South Wales Echo

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FRIEND CATLIFFE'S I CONSCIENCE. I BY SHIRLEY BROWNE. "Friend Gripstone, does thee want to buy a few nice spring- chickens ?" Rachel Catliffe's sweet voice sounded above the liurr of Mrs dripstone's sewing machine, as that thrifty matron stitched away at the new patch- work quilt she was making. Mrs Gripstone was dried up and wrinkled like a last year's tulip bulb left on the shelf by mistake. Rachel was round and blooming, with long lashes to her dark gray eyes, and a dimple at the curve of her chin. Chickens, hey ?'' said Mrs Gripstone. "Why yon don't mean to say you're selling off them beautiful young I Plyin-)utli Rocks, jest for broilers 7" Yes," said Rachel, with a sigh. Father has no work just now, and mother is ailing with her cough. And the money for the chickens will be quite acceptable if I can manage to sell them." How much 7" said Mrs Gripstone, curtly. Thirty cents apiece," answored Rachel. Give you twenty-five," said Mrs Gripstone. I could not sell them for less than thirty," said Rachel. "They will be worth fifty in a few weeks more, if we could afford to keep them." "Say twenty-eight and I'll take 'em." said Mrs Gripstone, with a bundle of patches sus- pended in mid-air. "Thirty," meekly persisted Rachel. "See," she added, lifting the lid of the basket, these are all fat and flourishing. Thee can fat them a little more, and thee will easily get fifty cents for them when Friend Doty comes around with his wagon for the hotels." Waal," rather unwillingly acceded Mrs Grip- stone, who had all a New Englander's delight in a bargain, I s'pose I'll hev to take 'em—but it's as much to oblige you, Rachcl Catliffe, as for anything else." Thee is very kind," said Rachel, gently. Fatner hain't sold the corner store yet, has he ?" said Mrs Gripstone, as she was counting out the money after having given the speckled beauties into the charge of Peter, the chore-boy. We heard that Manlius Moody had offered him a thousand dollars for it. No," said Rachel, "ho has not sold it. He will not sell it to be used for a drink store. It -.s a matter of conscience with him, thee knows, Friend Gripstone." Humph," observed Mrs Gripstone. It'll be a matter of bread and butter pretty soon, I should think. It's all he's got." "It was an unfortunate bequest of Uncle Watson," sighed Rachel. It's only adapted to a tavern—and hereabouts there seems to be ii,, opening for a temperance house." 'Tain'í; as if your father was a spry young man," remarked Mrs Gripstone. "He's a poor rheumaticky creeter. And your mother she never was real strong—and there are the children, you know. A thousand dollars would pay off the mortgage on the farm, wouldn't it ?"' Yes," said Rachel, "but father wouldn't barter his conscience for ten times a thousand dol- lars. Since Cousin Jotbam died of delirium tre- mens, he has had strong opinions on the subject, thee knows." • Mrs Gripstone said no more, but when Rachel was gone, she expressed her sentiments without restraint to her own family. "If ever there was a fool," said she, "Caleb Catliffe is one. What airthiy difference does it make to him what use Manlius Moody puts that tumble-down old house to. It's just throwin' away a thousand dollar." that's what it is." Jest my opinion," said Farmer Gripstone, who had always fallen down and worshiped the Moloch of gold. It ain't mine, then," said Haven Gripstone, a sturdy young fellow of two or threc-and-twenty. "There's enough people around here that have been ruined by the sale of liquor already. And Friend Catliffe is right to stick to his principles. Only it is hard on a delicate girl like Rachel to go out to day-work to keep the pot boiling." The Corner Store," as it had always been called, was undoubtedly a good, stand for what was called road business." It was on the way from the tanneries down the river. The cattle dealers, driving their herds to town, passed the very door. The village post-office was not far distant, and the newly-opened stone-quarries had recently attracted a host of stalwart miners. But Caleb Catliffe would neither open it himself, nor rent it to anyone who who would not pledge him- self to abstain from the sale of spirituous liquors. I am a poor man," said Friend Caleb, "but I am not poor enough to barter away my con- science." iSo ho lived on, pinched and poverty striken, in the ruinous old farm-house, while Rachel's earnings kept the wolf, Starvation, from the door. But one night Haven Gripstone met her re- turning from her day's work at Mrs Hull's, where she had earned seventy-fi ve cents by sitting closely at the machine from the pale winter sunrise to the fall of dusk. Rachel," said he, this won't do. You are working yourself to death." Oh, no, I am not," said Rachel, a flush rising to her colourless cheek. But I say you are," pronounced Haven. There has got to be an end to it. Let me end it, Rachel. Promise that you will be my wife." Thee does not mean it, Friend Haven," said Rachel, in a low voice. I do mean it," said Haven. I love you, Rachel. You must have seen it long ago. I want you to belong to me." Thy mother will never consent," faltered the pretty Quakeress. If you consent, Rachel, I don't care what any one else says," impatiently uttered Haven. But thee doesn't know all, pleaded Rachel. "I heard father saying last night that Squire Overington was going to foreclose on the mortgage next month. We shall be without a home,— father and mother, and Eunice and Dorcas. I could not leave them now. Haven, thanking thee all the same." Who has asked you to leave them, Rachel ?" said Haven, the assumed brusqueness of his tone covering a hidden depth of tenderness that was beyond all expression. Your parents and the children will be sure of a home where I am, Rachel,—you might be very certain of that." So Rachel went home, the promised wife of Haven Gripstone. "Thee should be a happy girl, Rachel," said her poor, pale little mother, with tears in her eyes. A good man's love is Heaven's choicest gift." There, wife," said old Caleb, exultantly, did I not tetl thee last night that Providence would provide a way for us 1" The Gripstones, however, did not take matters so complacently. "I, for one," said Mrs Gripstone, "won't never consent to my son's marryin' the darter of that poor half-crazy creetur', Caleb Catliffe. Net but what Rachel is a nice gal enough, but she hain't got a penny, and never will have!" And," added Mr Gripstone, who was equally hard in his way, there's that m's'able, shiftless family taked on to her apron-strings. We might as well open Town Poor-house at once But Haven Gripstone avoided these pitfalls by asking no one's consent, but quietly marrying Rachel one night in the rlend8 meeting-house. You aren't goin' to bring her here I" said the indignant mother-in-law, when she heard of it. II You are right," said Haven. I am not. I shall take her to the corner store. We intend to live in the little back shop until I can re- build the old place so that it will be decent to live in. I didn'tlearn the carpenter's trade for nothing! „„ Goin' to open a liquor stores ? said Mr Grip- stone, with sparkling eyes. There's money in it, if-" c, Nothing of the sort," said Haven. I shall do the best I can with the farm. If wo don't get along just at first, Rachel will try the experi- ment of keeping summer boarders. Of one thing we are quite certain—we shall ask help from no one but Heaven!" Mr Gripstone, senior, shook his head. As he afterwards told his wife, it sort o' stumped him to hear how. completely Haven had caught the twang o' them Quaker folks "It's sort of irreverent, talking about Heaven that-a-way outen the pulpit," said he. (Which was certainly an irreverence which no one could accuse Nathan Gripstone of.) Squire Overington foreclosed the mortgage on the Catliffe farm, as everybody expected he would do. Far be it," said honest Caleb, "to begrudge the man his own. I can now help Haven in the corner store fields, if the rheumatism will let me." And it was a very happy little household that gathered around the fireplace in the back shop where the old liquor seller had once stored his bins and barrels. The floor was covered with a light rag-carpet, the windows were curtained with white cross-bar, at five cents a yard-the children played in the sunshine, and Rachel sang at her work. Until one windy March night, when there came a terrific orash, Haven went to the floor with a lantern in his hand. It is as I feared," said he. In digging out the new foundation, the men have loosened the old supports too much. The corner stone is a mere heap of bricks and timbers "The Lord be praised," said Caleb Catliffe. He hath seen fit to wipe it off from the face of the earth,—now we can begin again All the neighbours from far and wide came to ▼iew the rains in the chill* raw light of the mor- row's dawn. But it was old Peter Fulke, the village idiot, who, rooting like a blind mole in the debris, discovered what had lain hidden for a cen- tury at least,—a rusted iron box, filled with old Spanish gold. I Pretty pennies, said Peter, with a grin, as he let them sift through his fingers. Pretty pennies." "It isn't real money?" said Rachel, when Haven showed it to her, a few minutes later. But it is, dear. Not out- coin,—but that of Spain. It is real, genuine gold. Gold that Heaven has sent to us." Is thee sure that it is ours, Haven ?" Yes, Rachel, quite sure." After that Caleb Catliffe and his conscience were held in bntter estimation in the vicinity. Even Nath;.» Gripstone came to see the ruins, and at the exact place where the square box bad bided its time, since the days when King George levied his insolent taxes on the North American Colonies, and Cornwallis rode, rough-shod, over the rights of the people. And out of that pot of buried gold rose the fair blossom of Haven Gripstone's new home, and Rachel's happiness. If thee had sold the old house to Manlius Moody, father," said Rachel, thee would never have found the hidden treasure. And a thousand dollars would have been a poor bargain." Poor.indeed, said FriendJCaleb, especially when thee considers, daughter, that I should have bargained away my conscience also."

BANKRUPTCY OF A MAGISTRATE Extensive Undertaking at Briton Ferry. On Thursday, at the Bristol county court- before Mr W. J. Metcalfe, Q.C., judge—the case of Charles Lonsdale Formby, of Salcombe, gentle- man, came on for hearing.—Mr H. H. Becking- ham said he appeared for the trustee, Mr F. D. Braine, of Neath, and he bad to ask his honour to annul the bankruptcy. Mr Formby, until a few years ago, was a gentleman of very considerable wealth, and holding a high position. He was deputy-lieutenant for the county of Essex, and a magistrate. He conceived the idea of erecting some works at Briton Ferry, and during the course of the erection of those works two gentle- men, who were trustees of his, disappeared with the trust fund, amounting to something like £ 90,000. That meant utter and complete ruin to Mr Formby and it also stopped all the building work going on at Briton Ferry. Having con- sidered his position, Mr Formby felt that to give up the works in their then condition would be to lose everything, and he raised money for the purpose of iinishing the works and starting them, but he did not estimate the capital required, and when the works were completed he found he had no capital to work them, and no means of raising capital. He found his only re- source was to hand over the works to his credi- tors. That was done, but immediately after- wards the secured creditors came down and took possession of everything, all the works and the plant, and there was barely sufficient for the secured creditors, and the unsecured creditors were out in the cold. The bankrupt was anxious to do everything in his power to assist them, and having conferred together, the unsecured creditors resolved to make Mr Formby a bankrupt, that they might make the fullest investigation into the securities and those who had realised under them. Mr Formby was made bankrupt. But when the investigation was completed the trustee of the creditors felt it would bu perfectly useless and hopeless to get into any litigation with the se- cured creditors to restore any of the property of the estate, and there was therefore no further object in keeping the bankruptcy proceedings on foot. Mr Formby applied to his creditor that they would allow the bankruptcy proceedings to be annulled, and they intimated their willingness to that being done. Hence the present application. His Honour said he supposed there was no objec- tion to the course proposed?—Mr Beckingham said there was no objection from creditors or from any other quarter; everyone iiitei-ested in the bankruptcy appeared to be unati Honour directed that the bankruptcy should be annulled.

THE STRANDING OF THE S.S. OlA VEAGA. Board of Trade Inquiry at Swansea The Master Censured. The Master Censured. At the Town-hall, Swansea, on Thursday after- noon, Mr J. C. Fowler (the chairman) and Cap- tains Beasley and Parkinson (the nautical assessors) gave their decision in the inquiry which has, for the past three days, been held into the circumstances attending the stranding of the s.s. Olaveaga, of Swansea, on a rock off Sables d'Olonne, France. The court found that the master (Mr J. P. Stephenson) was in default, but not the other officers. There was no evidence to satisfy the court that the master's explanation of the casualty was a sound and correct one- viz., the existence of a danger unknown, and unmarked on the chart. The court were of opinion that the ship struck on some part of one of the known obstacles, and they considered that the master was open to censure for taking a passage from the south-west by his own choice, having the alternative of the south-east or the great channel, which was com- paratively free from danger, and relying on his own observation, without seeking the aid of a pilot, who was at hand immediately after the casualty. Then he took the more dangerous passage when the tide was at half ebb, and the danger, consequently, more increased. The court believed the vessel was lost by a serious error in judgment, which amounted very nearly to cul- pable carelessness but considering the master's previous good character, they refrained from deal- ing with his certificate, and merely severely censured him.

ALARMING NUMBER OF INTER- I MENTS AT CARDIFF. A meeting of the burial board committee was held at the Town-hall on Thursday. Alder- man Stone presided. There were also present— Councillors Trounce, Beavan, Carey, Morgan, Hurley, James, and Andrews. The ordinary work was gone through, the cemetery manager's report shewing that the alarming number of 202 interments took place during the month of De- cember, being an increase of 76 over December, 1883. There had been 1,751 interments during 1884, as against 1,327 in 1883; increase, 424, The last six months of 1884 were most fatal, there being 981 burials as compared with 659 for the Isst six months of 1883, or an increase of 322.

PRINCE EDWARD OF WALES. The Mayor of Salisbury has received a letter from Prince Edward, thanking him for the address forwarded from the town council. His Royal Highness adds he will ever "strive to merit in future years the good opinions and hopes which you entertain on his behalf, and always by God's blessing, to act for the benefit of the people of these realms."

I FEEL SO WEARY AND TIRED" Is the exclamation of many whom we daily meet, yet they never pause to think or reflect upon the cause of this feeling. It may arise from "sluggish mid impure blood.' which, if neglected, is the forerunner of serious and chronic disorders. This weary and tired feeling is nature warning us that there is something wrong, which must be set right, or a long and lingering illness will speedily follow. What does nature require to throw off this weary and tired feeling? She requires to have new life and energy imparted to all the organs of the body, and the best means to do go is to take "G wilym Evans' Quinine Bitters," which purifies the blood, and imparts new life and energy. It is invalu- able to those who are suttering from affections of the chest, indigestion, nervousness, debility in its worst forms, depression of spirits, and melancholy. GWILYM EVANS'S QUININE BITTERS. THE VEGETABLE TONI c.-This preparation is now exten- sively taken throughout the country by patients suffer- ing from debility, nervousness, and general exhaustion, and, if any value be attached to human testimony, the efficacy of this medicine has been successfully estab- lished. Its claims have been tested and proved by the medical profession and others, and corroborated by the written testimonials of eminent men. The Quinine Bitters contain not only a suitable quantity of Quinine in each dose, but the active principles of the following well-known herbs—sarsaparilla. saffron, gentian, laven- der, and dandelion root. The use of Quinine is well known, but it has never been satisfactorily combined with these preparations until, after overcoming consi derable difficulties, the proprietor was able to secure a perfectly uniform preparation, combining all the essential properties of the above plants in thei greatest purity and concentration. It is now established as a family medicine, and is increasing in popular avourthe more it is known and tested. Gwylim Evans's Quinine Bitters is a tonic Pick-me-up,' scientifically mixed in happy proportions. MODE OF ACTION.—(And here lies the secret of the Remedy.)-Tlie Quinine Bitters (being a vegetable tonic), by their peculiar power, strengthen that part of the system which is weakest, and, therefore, most liable to colds and their attendant diseases. The in- gredients they contain cannot be put into pills, but the patient can follow his usual occupation without fear of exposure. GWILnr EVANS' QUININE BITTERS are recommended by Doctors, Analysts, Chemists. Sold in 3s 9d and 4s 6d Bottles, and Cases containing three 4s M Bottles at 12s 6d per case, by all Chemists, or from the Proprietor, arriage free, parcels post (under cover). N.B.—No one hould suffer without trying "G wilym Evans* Quinine Bittors.iNIr GWILYM EVANS, F.C.S., .Porprietor, a Moratory, LI welly, South Wales. 70868

f YANKEE YARNS. WHAT SHE WISHED,-An Austin youtig man has been boring a young lady with his attentions for some time past, although on various and sun- dry occasions she has given him. to understand that he was distasteful to her. A few evenings ago he assured her that he was anxious to fulfil her every wish. 1, Is it really a fact that you will do whatever I ask of you?" Your slightest wish is law. Command me, and I shall obey." 11 Well, then, I wish you would see. if you can induce my mother to marry you. She;is'a widow, and not so particular about whom t she-, marries as I am." My dear," he said, as lic'enteredthe house, who is that gentleman across thetreet 1" I am not sure, but I think he^is an old beau of mine." How long has he been wavingthis handker- chief?" "Ob, more than half an hour." Is he trying to flirt with you?" "That's just what annoys me. He may mean it for me or for the lady in the bay window above. If it's for me I ought to know it, and if it's for her I'll never speak to the shame-faced thing again as long as I live Oh, George, you don't know how vexatious it is to have roomers above you. I wish we had n little cottage of our own." Mr Robinson," Lid the bookeeper to the old man, in the office, "here's a. letter from Smith, over in Indiana, in which he proposes to pay 60 per cent. of the bill he owes." "Gootness, kracious, vot ish dat? V ot ish dat?" screamed the old man. Smith proposes to pay 60 per cent. repeated the bookkeeper. Can't ve schveeze more ash dot out oaf him, no vay ?" No, sir; I understand; that's the very best he can do." Yell, dot ish shameful vor a man to shont us in dot vay. Only 60 per cent., you shay ?' That's all. Von't he make eet sixty-von?" No, 60 is the limit." Veil, eef ve must, ve must, I shupposhe, bood I don't like dat vay oaf settling. We shoot haf mate two hoondert unt sheventy-five per chedt. on dose goots, unt now ve vill haf to be satisfied mit only a leedle ofer a hundert unt ten, unt any beezness man can see dat sooch profits vill I-Uin trade in sphite oaf all ve can do to increashe de proshperity oaf our republican institutions." Old bow-legged Jake, a coloured man of high standing and extreme blackness, ontered the county clerk's office and said, Boss, I wants a par ob marriage license. I'se a ole man, but I'se gwine ter marry one ob de youngest gals in dis community. Have the parents of the girl any objections to the marriage?" asked the clerk, hesitating as to whether or not the license should be issued. "Hit doan seem so ter me." Did you ask the old man's consent?" "No, sah." How do you know theu that he does not ob- ject?" Well, yer see, I has been callm' on de young lady for some time, an' las' night de ole man come in, tuck down a Army gun, an' said dat he reckoned ,me an Lindy oughter get married. Dis mornin' he come ober ter my house wid de gun, an' said sunthin' about my gcin' at once an' getten de license. I told him dat I had a wife somewhar in de country, but he cocked de ole gun an' looked Ro sad like dat I struck a trot for dis office." ''If you have t living wife, old man, I can't issue a license." But, boss, dis is one ob dese stringent cases. De fadder ob do gal is standin' out at de corner ob do house wid dat Array gun. It's better, boss, for a man to hab two libin' wives den it is for a 'oman ter hab one dead husband." Finally the old man with the gun was induced to come into the office and ex- plain. Well'. see, bass," he said, "old Jake hab been bumin' my oil an' wv.arin' out de bottoms ob my chairs long enough. He's been eatin' at my house more'n a year, courtin' my gal, an' now I wants him to board the gal awhile. Ef he don't, I'll ha,t> to injure liitn." After a while, however, the old man agreed that, if Jake would pay him five dollars, the affair should be settled without marriage. My friend," said a gentleman to a German whom he had met upon a comer can you tell me I where the post-office is ?" "Yah." Well, if you please, be kind enough to tell me." J know who he vas." I am in a hurry, sir," replied the gentleman, tell me whore it is." Oh, you vant to found der post-office out, aind it-* "Yes." "Oh. veil. Dots besser, you go four/plocks south, den you go two plocks dat vay. den you vas go four plocks nord, den you come mit two plocks dis vay." Why, you fool, that brings me back to this identical spot." Vell, dots all right." Then, where is the post-office ?" "You vant der post-office. Oh, yaw, dots yoost across der shtreet. Vhy don't you said so, yet I daught you vanted to took it away mit you, but you don't vas fool me once. I vas a candidate for dot places myself. I vas ft democrat neider. "-Pretzel's Weekly. CLEARING OFF TIMBER. I A few weeks ago, weaned with my editorial duties, I lay my pen aside and went an a visit to my uncle, who owns a farm in a distant State. I am partial to rural life. Nothing would suit me better than to own a farm in the country. I hardly think a farm in the city would do. The horse cars mighir run over your cows and t'ne policeman break into your corn-crib and steal y/our corn. Well, my uncle received me wi',¡h open arms. Said be: c, Parmenas, those heavy editorials that you wrote me were creating such profound sen- sation in Europe are wearing you out. Better look out, my boy, and not strain your-brain too much the top of your head may fly off nome day." I enjoyed myself very much, at Uncle Jim's. Nothing was too good for me--o,t least I thought so-and time slipped away very pleasantly. .t\8 cold weather approached the bracing air seemed to fill me with a desire to exerci/se my muscles, so one morning I remarked to 'Uncle Jim: "Say, haven't you got some timber ;you want cleared off this winter? I'm an excellent chopper, and to see the chips fly and the giant oak fall crashing to the earth always fills one with. unbounded delight. (Once, while in the army, 1 hacked_ down a few small cedars for firewood.) Uncle Jim immedia- tely got me an axe and pi loted me to the worst looking piece of timber I h ad ever seen. Most of the trees were four feet in diameter, and the un- dergrowth was as thick as the hair on a dog. Besides there was an intricate network of wild grape-vines woven in among the trees. Uncle Jim said: There, my boy, a.muse yourself," and left me. After an hour's ardons toil I made a clearing around one of the largest oaks, spit on my hands and sailed in. I managed to get through the bark after awhile, and then sat down and gasped for breath. I know now why a man's ribs are built so substantially; it's to keep woodchopper's hearts from jumping through their breasts and bounding off into the woods. When night csune I had made a hole in that tree about the size of the; first cut in a cheese, and I felt next morning ?.s if I had been run over by all the artillery and cavalry in the United States service. I was three days felling that tree. I cut all around the conf ounded thing and then tried to push it down, but it stood there as firm as the proprietor of of a one-priced store. I went to the house and secrotly got an old rip-saw, and tried that on awhile, but no go. Another hour's super- human effort with the axe, however, made the stubborn old fellow topple and crack, and the next instant he feU with a crash that shook the earth from Maine to the Gulf of Mexico. It fell across a new eight-rail fence and killed a cow that was grazing on the other side-killed her as dead as a cove oyster. I then sat down on a stump and shed the first solid tears I had shed in sixteen years. To think/that I sheuld toil "and sweat and swear for three whole days just to knock $50 out of my dear Uncle Jim's pocket. I went; sorrowfully to the house, and when the old gentleman came in he said: 11 Well, how are you getting along?" 41 Got that big tree down, I replied. Which way did it fall ?" asked Uncle Tim. "Downwards," T nswered, "and smashed four panels of fencing a gave an old spotted cow such a rap that her cu, i flew fifty feet, There s nothing saleable about her now but her hide and horns deduct the price of those and charge the rest to me." Uncle Jim sank into a chair, leaned his bead upon his hands, groaned dismally, and sighed, Poor Spot! Aunt Susan covered her face with her apron and sobbed, Poor old Spotty 1" The children also set up a wail of lamentation. I was forced to go into the kitchen and take a smoke of the old man's tobacco to hide my emotion. Pre- sently he came in and paid; Well, there's no crying over spilled milk (it was spilled milk in this instance, sure enough); you can go right on and clean off that timber, work the trunks up into cordwood and fence rails and the tops into firewood, and we'll say no more about it." No, uncle," I feelingly replied, that would be too slight a remuneration; you must receive a more generous reward. 1111 send you my paper for twenty-five years at $2 a year." The next morning I came home. There's a coolness now existing between Uncle Jim and vul.

FACTS AND FANCIES, NARROW ESCAPE.—The chimney flue. A "PLUCKY" FELLOW.—A busy poulterer. A FIGURE OF SPEECII. Naught set down, in malice. WHAT AN IRASCIBLE FATHER SAYS.— As the twig is bent the boy is inclined to shoot out at,the, door. FOR THE WEATIIER-WISE.- The weather can scarcely be called "settled while heavy "dews". are seen every morning. Why is it impossible that there should be/one best horse on a racecourse ?—Because you will always find a better there. A poor copying-clerk at the French Ministry of the Interior was lately asked what place he occu- pied there. "Oh, a very good place," -he)replied between the stove and the window BUSINESSLIKE AND STRAIGHTFORWARD.—Three American young ladies stopping at a village inn in Switzerland, filled in the columns in the visitors' book headed "Occupation" with the words, Looking for a husband." A certain newspaper proprietor, lately deceased, was once vigorously attacked for inserting objec- tionable advertisements in his newspaper. My dear fellow," he replied to his tormentor, what can I do ? I charge them double price I" ( The master of a national school was censuring a pupil for the dulness of his comprehension, and said, Is not the price of a penny loaf always a penny ?" when the boy innocently answered, "No, sir; the baker soils them two for three-halfpence, when they are stale." We don't want all this we don't want it/ said a solicitor the other day to a voluble/old lady in the witness-box, "It is irrelevant." But the witness paid no heed, and talked on, finishing with, "There, you've got it, whether you'want^it or not and it isn't irreverent either -<>- QUESTION AND ANSER."—Parisienno who has hired a tiny villa for the season in Normandy, addressing the proprietor: What are these pillows stuffed with? They are as hard as rocks." Proprietor: "Goose feathers." Parisienne: Ah, I see-not separated from the bones!" General Lee one day found Doctor Cutting, the army surgeon, who was a handsome and dressy man, arranging his cravat complacently before a glass. "Cutting," said Lee, "you must be the happiest man in creation." Why, General?" Because," said Lee, you are in love with your-, self, and have not a rival on earth." Minister to Rory: "Why weren't you at the kirk on Sunday ? Rory: I wis at Mr Dunlop's kirk." Minister: "I don't like your rinning aboot tae strange kirks in that way. Not that I object tae yer hearing Mr Dunlop; but I'm sure ye widna like yer am sheep straying away into strange pastures." Rory I widuacare a grata, I¡ sir, if it was better gress." Inquiring stranger to steamboat pilot: That is Black Mountain, is it?" Pilot: Yes, sir; highest mountain about Lake George." Stranger Any story or legend connected with that rnoun- tain?" Pilot: "Yes, lots of 'em. One of the most harrowing is about two lovers that went up j that mountain and never came down again. j Stranger Indesd What became of them ?" ;1 Pilot: "They went down on the other side." ¡ The late Judge W., on a visit to Niagara, when the car was in use on the inclined plane, raised-) and lowered by steam power, went into the start-: j ing-house to witness the descent, too timid to go himself. After the car started, fully impressed with the danger, he turned to the man in charge and said, Suppose, sir, the ropo should break ill The man, with a serious countenance and a aingls I eye to business, replied, Oh, that would be all right—they all paid before they went." JOINT PRODUCTION.—" I had gone to the ¡ apartments of a friend of mino," writes n ¡ dramatic author in the Paris Figaro, but stopped short in the nntc-rooin on hearing the following words, uttered in q. tone of the greatest excitement-' You are an assassin, a regular butcher.' And what are you but a white-livered coward?' Then I heard the sound of a straggle going on, and the fall of a heavy Body ori the floor. On bursting into the room, I found my j friend collaborating with one of his colleagues, with whom he was trying to settle an argument friend collaborating with one of his colleagues, with whom he was trying to settle an argument as to whether, at the close of the play, a woman I was to he sacrificed or to receive forgiveness." FAITH I-It is Cardinal Manning who relate* this incident aa having happened to hiitifelf- One night I was returning to my residence in Westminster, when I met a poor man carrying a basket and smoking a pipe. I thought over this Aristotelian syilogism:—He who smokes gets thirsty; he who is thirsty desires to drink he who drinks too much gets drunk he who gets drunk is lost. This man is in danger of mental sin. Let us save him. I affectionately addressed him. 'Are you a Catholic ?' 'I am, thanks be to Heaven 'Where are you from ?' 'From Cork, your reverence.' 'Are you a member of the total abstinenca society?' 'No, your reverence.' Now,' said I, 4 that is very wrong. Look at me; I am a member.' 'Faith, maybe your reverence has need of it I shook hands with him and left him." PEOPLE SHOULD BE CAREFUL IN GIVING ADVICE. She was telling at a neighbour s bow her husband ¡ had been troubled for several days with a severe pain in the head, and that she had done every- thing to relieve it, and that the doctor's medicine did not seem to do any good, and that she was tired out, fussing and fretting. Thereupon a new neighbour, who had just been introduced Ito her, kindly asked if she had tried soaking his feet in mustard and hot water. Insult me in my affliction, will you, you shameful hussy gasped the wife of the sick man, her fingers working con- vulsively, her blood rising to boiling heat and her voice getting higher and higher. The hostess in- terposed in defence of the new neighbour, and quiet was finally restored. It appeared that, some years before, the sick husband had been deprived of both of his legs by the breaking of a piece of machinery, and there had been a story that his present wife had married him for his money. HIS JAPANESE VASE. I X. is a distinguished writer, rich, famous, but withal of extraordinary avarice. During five years he laboured at a great literary work, into which he put heart and soul, and in which he was greatly assisted by the generous kindness of a young friend who often served him as secretary. When the book was finished and greeted wUh great approbation by the public, the wife sug- gested to her husband the propriety of offering the friend some {testimony of appreciation of his services. There is your Japanese vase," she said it cost you very little, and you do not prize it much; but I have heard hiip express vast admiration of its colour and workmanship. As,we dare not offerhim money, why not delicately beg him to accept this. as a token of your gratitude I" X listened without replying. Tho next day, meeting his young friend, lie said to him, My dear H., I am under such a weight of obligation to you—words cannot express- Do not speak of it, I beg." If I might, without seeminv indelicacy, suggest— there is my Japanese vase-you admire it so much-" Generous friend But I cannot deprive you- "Indeed!" broke in X. blithely. Then I must be allowed to insist that you come and look at it upon my cabinet just as often as you feel disposed!" JACK'S LIBERALITY.—A man-of-war's man, a regular British tar, stepped into a post-office, and, addressing the postmaster, asked, "D° T » J em J enkins, A.B., of the Bulldog ] w -b,, replied the postmaster. Why do yo -j Because I want you to give a letter to him, replied the sailor, on saying which an epistle. "Very well," said the postmaster; the letter shall be sent to him J* y™ must put a stamp on it." "Bw the deuce can you send a letter to Jem Jenkl?« nK fjf f yjU Uow him?" inquired the tar. Oh, that does not matter ? answered the postmaster. I can send the letter but it will ccst you a penny for the stamp. otamp!" cried the sailor. "Show me one. 4 A stamp was accordingly shown to him, when he exclaimed, 14No, shiver me if I put Jem Jenkins off with a penny, for he often spent a crown upon me! Haven't you got anything handsomer than this?" The postmaster replied in the affirmative, and showed him a twopenny stamp. Well," cried Jack, this^looks decenter. But haven't you got anything better? The postmaster showed him a shilling stamp, which Jack inspected with an ex- pression of approval, saying, All right; put five of them on the letter. Shiver my timbers, I will never send Jem Jenkins less than five shillings' worth 11' Saying this, he threw down five shillings, took lipfche five shilling stamps and stuck them on the letter, which he then threw in the letter- box, with expressions of satisfaction at having spent a crown on J em Jenkins,

THE SALVATION ARMY BALANCE-SHEET. 1. The report of the work of the Salvation Army during the year ending September 30th, 1884, which has just been issued, includes a balance- sheet, in which the principal items of receipt and expenditure are shown. These accounts, which have been audited by Messrs Josiah Beddow and Son, chartered accountants, show that the total sum received during the period mentioned was, omitting, as we shall do through- out, the shillings and pence, £ 74-,665, and the whole of this large sum was spent, with the ex- ception of a balance in hanu of £448. The items are allotted under several headings. First comes the general spiritual fund, which started on the 30th September, 1883, with a balance to the good of only jMl. The donations and subscriptions to this fund amonted to £ 6,549, and the other principal items of receipt were J3840 repaid from and on account of various stations 2596 received on account of the expenses of officers charged with the oversight of divisions; 2400 paid as pro- portion of rent by the trade department; £388 subscribed to pay the costs in connection with the action respecting the Eagle Tavern; £ 1,635 from members' subscriptions and collections taken at meetings for the auxiliary defence and supply fund; Z720 balance brought from the thanksgiv- ing and extension fund S9,616 balance brought from the extraordinary relief fund and £ 3,282, grant from thetradedepartment. The total recepts of this fund were £ 24,493. The counter account shows the following items of expenditurej Grants and aftvnnr-as to corps for general expenses and offic,?rs' 22,343; salaries, travelling, and otherexp' officers charged with theover- sight of divisiu :1,779,; office salaries, printing and 'stationery, me., at head-quarters, £ 3,768; rent and rates of offices, cleaning, coal, gas, etc., £ 2,253; salaries of staff officers attached to head- quarters, £637; expenditure incurred at council of war and special charges, £ 614 books and uniforms supplied to poor stations, £ 984-; postage and telegrams at head-quarters, L793 travelling expenses, £ 564 legal charges, 2632 printing and postage of annual balance sheet, official boxes, and rents of halls for meetings, £ 1,714 auxiliary, defence, and supply salaries, cost of printing Auxiliary Monthly," and sundry expenses, £ 353 grant to Training Home, £ 4,500 grant to sick and wounded—by wounded "—being meant those who are injured in street disturbances— £ 500 cost of actions in suit Ebbetts v. Booth, to determine the Eagie Tavern question, 21,591 and expenses involved in yielding up possession of the Taver £ 384. ()"; -io, The amount left in hand at the end of was £ 176, Then comes the building fund. L-io re- ceipts on account of which were £ 36,228. This sum included a balance from the year ending September, 1883, of £ 6,045 an advance on the mortgage of St. James's Hall, Bath and Frome, £ 1,201; mortgage on Castle- ford Barracks, £ 1,000 mortgages of £ 1,200 and £1,000 on Battersea and Camberwell barracks respectively donations, subscriptions, and rents for the erection of Marylebone bar- racks, £ 1,269 a mortgage on these barracks, £ 1,000; amount received from various corps for rent?, £ 5.803; and loans for the erection and purchase of buildings, £ 13,588. The principal items of expenditure were £ 2.527, Mr a. new building at Leamington; £ 3,518 on account o; the barracks at. Marylebone £ 1,148 on account of building at York; £1,265 paid for rents of I halls used by various corps, and £ 5,380 loans repaid. Tho rest of the expenditure was in smaller sums, nearly all under £ 500, and the total shows a balance in hand of £,031. Thn I summary shows that the financial year 1833.% started with a balance in favour of the building fund of £ 5,104-; the total receipts on account of the general spiritual fund were £ 24,4-52, and the other sums received were-For India, £ 734; for the training homes, £ 6,302; rescue home, £ 135; sick and j wounded, £ 334: foreign service, £ 3,704; Fr.-mce and Switzerland, £ 2,082 United States, £ 13 Aus- tralia and jNJew Zealand, £ 339 Cape of Good Hope, £ 72; Canada, £ 89 Sweden, £ 118; anu for the building fund, £ 50,182; makuigf, Av?fch the shillings and pence omitted, tho total of £ 74,665. On the expenditure side we find the balance over- paid to various .departments account for £ 5,391, and the following payments have been made for carrying on_ the movement: General spiritual iunu, £ 19,316 India, £ 655 training homes, £ 10.947 rescue homes, £ 132; sick and wounded, £1.161; foreign service, £2,831; France and Switzer iar.d, £ 2,316 United States, j-157; Aus- tralia and New Zealand, £ 318 California, £55 Cape of Good Hope, f,,3 7 Canada, £141; Sweden, £ 25 and building nxnd, £ 30,146, leav- j ing a balance in hand of £ 44S. The profit and loss account of the trade department shows that the business is conducted with very considerable profit. When the year com- menced there was a stock on hand valued I at £ 7,368; purchases of books, paper, &c., were made to the amount of 29,355; the paper, ink, stereos, &c., for tLc War Cry and Little Soldier cost 216,322; the printing of these two poriodi eatH, and purchase of general literature, cost 23,456 purchases for the general outfit depart- ment came to £ 16.247 and wages,manufacturing, &c., amounted to £1,048; making a total of £ 53,799. On the other side the receipts were From the sales of books, &c., and printing, £ 11,927; sales of War Cry and Little Soldier, £ 20,250; and sales in the outfit department, £ 18,782; a total of £ 59,959; the stcck left on hand being of the estimated value of £ 11,385. The expenses under the heads of wages, plant, rent, salaries, &c., came to £ 11,594, and the re- sult of the year's transactions was to leave a nett profit of 26,790. Mr W. Bramwell Booth, the "Chief of Staff," states in the report that £ 30,000 will be required in order to maintain the work throughout the world during the present year.

ASLEEP IN CHARGE OF A BRISTOL VESSEL. Suspension of a Second Mate's Certificate. For falling asleep whilst in charge of a vessel during the captain s absence in his cabin, Kemp Heavisides, second mate of a vessel called the Lochiel, from Bristol to Calcutta, had his certifi- ficate suspended for three months by the Liver- pool Marine Board on Thursday.

RADICAL REFORMS. Professor Stuart, M.P., speaking at Bolton on Thursday night, advocated the easy transfer of land, the abolition of the law of entail, and com- pensation for disturbance in case of improvements on the conclusion of short leases, and the increase of powers to loge governing bodies to acquire land or houses. demanded that education should be v,i;shpH being found in the funds of the dises Treia Church. He advocated the governme^ f by Irishmen sent from England reform in the constitution of too

THE BETROTHAL OF PRINCESS I BEATRICE. The Whitehall pHncess °V.a a.uthorifcy after her eatrice and her after her a:de with the Queen for six months in each year, an? er 81X months will pro- bably be in ^e™any. During this latter time the JJuchess of Albany will live with the Queen. T'"3 marriage of the Princess Beatrice is the outcome or a love match which had existed four years. It has all along been discouraged by the Queen.

THE PRINCE OF WALES AND I BIRMINGHAM. At a special meeting of the Birmingham Agri- cultural Society, held at the Queens Hotel on -Thursday, under the presidency of the Mayor, Alderman Martineau, a committee was ap- pointed to consider what preparations should be made for the reception of R.R.H. the Prince of Wales on the occasion of his visit to the show in November.

OLDHAM BOILER EXPLOSION. I The inauest on two of the four men killed by the Stanley Mill explosion, Oldham, was con- cluded on Thursday night. The scientific evi- dence was to the effect that the valve of the economizer might have become frozen, and it was recommended that there should be an extra vaiv The jury returned a verdiot to that effect.

THE CORPORATION OF LONDON having required the pr uni-fs of the Bankrupt Agency Association, 29, Ludeate-hill, E.C., for city improvements, tne Alliance Clothing Company, 33, St. Mary-strest beg most re- spectfully to inform tho inhabitants of Caiaiff and neighbourhood that they have £ the whole of the above company's stock," comprism0 Hobson and Co.'s stock of clothing, George Oliver s stock of hosiery and ties, and Strauss Bros.' stock of fancy goods for immediate sale at a trifle over one-half the origina invoice cost. Sale now proceeding at the Alliance immediate sale at a trifle over one-half the origina invoice cost. Sale now proceeding at the Alliance Clothing Company, 33, St. Mary-street, Cardiff. 244

The State of i rade. CARDIFF TRADE REPORT. J [SPECIAL REPOI1T DY OUR OWN I CARDIFF, Thursday Night,—It is satisfactory | to notice the great increase in tho coal clearance this week as winpared to those of last. '-T'13 to notice the great increase in the coal clearance this week as winpared to those of last. rlla I entries of tonnage for loading have, however. fallen off to a small extent. This may be in measure accounted for by the prevalence duviJ# the past week of easterly and north-easrerv winds, which axe not the most favourable f°* tonnage bound up this Channel. Sliipp01"3 generally have materially benefited by the provement in trade; second qualities are, however, easier. The weather has, on the whole, oeeV favourable to the movements of the tonnage general shipment of coal. There is no prosper' of any immediate falling off in the activity of tpe trade of the port, inasmuch as, great as the shIP" ments have been, the tonnage cleared is verY ne_arlvrepla.ced by the carrying capacity of tb' ships which have entered during the same Prices of steam coals have remained unchanged.. In the freight market qoutations for the Med1' terranean ports an slightly easier, owing to t-ho extensive cng-agements which have been enters" I' into. Orders are fairly plentiful, and there bein? a moderate supply of tonnage offering for employ ment, a satisfactory amount ol charter.ng In** been done. French and Spanish coal freights af0 been done. French and Spanish coal freights af0 still unchanged, and the same may be saia of the homeward freights from Bilhao and the MGditor- ranean ports with iron ore. The demand for ton* nage for Gibraltar and the Italian ports is steady* and that for Malta, Port Said. and the nighet, Mediterranean pITts is easier. Tae same may be -aid of the outward rate of freights for the Black Sea, -and the homeward freights thcnce are firmer* There is an easier tone in outward rate3 for the East Indies, but there is an improvement in homeward frieghts from thnL quarter. The demand for tonnage for the West Indies cot" tinues to be steady, and there is no alteration to report in connec'on with quotation for the Bra* zilion and River iJlate ports. There are one ur I two transactions announced this weak in contlee- tion with Transatlantic steam chartering lor viz., Cape Verds and St. Thomas ar. 9s, 0,111,! Havana at 10s. The outward iron carrying tr:),c¡" with the United States is flat, and the homeward business thence ea ner. Exports for the week: Coal. 14-8,024 tons; 670 tons; pzitent fue", 3,705 tons; coke, ;59:" sons. Imports for the week: Iron ore, 1,750 tons pitwood, 1,565 loads. SWANSEA TRADE REPORT. I [SPECIAL REPORT FROM OUB OWN COSTTUSPOVDKKRT.J I SWANSEA, Thursday Night.-I,. is satisfactory I to be able again to record considerabie activity the trade of this harbour during the past, week- The imports and export trade, nave been iarg • and an average amount of tonnage has arrived ballast to load. Tha selection of Swansea for the Í1.F. meetings of the tin-plate trade lias given general satisfaction. There have been no clearances of tin-plate" the States during the week, but shipment now being made by the Cambrian Company. The quarterly meeting held iast week ha" had much effect on operations in the tia-piciv- trade, and its condition is still quiat; prices are, if anything, weaker. Sales of common cokes have been made during the week, in soini (•ases at 13 9J per box; but the ruling figures for the better brands are still 14-s, 143 3d, and 14s 6d; but even at these figures it <, is not possible that much profit is made, and .] there appears to be no grounds cor supposing tha» any permanent improvement in prices will tak8 place until combined action on the p >rt of makers is carried out in the direction of reduced produc- tion- imports.—Uor.stwise—jtiaize, cw ions oax»« 356 tons flour, 50 tons piters, 557 tons muudic, 160 tons ore, 165 ton.) lead ore, 7 too. zinc ashes, 22 torn burnt ore, 165 tons blende. 164 tons copper ore, 476 tons flue dust, 13J tons chemicals, 92 tons snIt, 135 tons brick*' &e., 189 tons pig-iron, 1,335 tons. 0 Imports.—Foreign — Pot-i: Manganese, tons. Bilbao: Iron, 1,141 tons. Huelva: rites, 693 tons; copper ore, 809 toniz.. Messina Sulphur, 1,000 tons. Gijou Copper ore. 33 tons, J 9,1, f I Oats, 109 tons. St. Jobn" (N.H.) Deals, 837 loads. Total imports for t.i-j week, 10,452 tons. Exports.—Foreign—France: Coals, aa patent fuel, 1,120 tons; ti-ii-plate, 105 tons- Alderney: 60 tons. Copenhag.-n Co-d 1 ,aO tons. Ber?en Coals, 510 tons, Genera- 80 tons. Lisbon: Coals, 435 tony general, 20 tons. Valencia: Patent tU0*> 750 tons; coals, 143 tons. Cadiz: 290 tons bricks, 5 tons. Corunna Coals, lb-* tons; Matam: Coals, 1.500 tOllS; tlue'.va Coals, 1,255 tons Civita Vecehia: Coals, 1.700 tons; patent fuel, 1,250 tons Genoa coal 280 tons; Leghorn: Coals, 515 tons; patent fuel, 2,966 tons Bona: Coals,540 tons ;BussoralI: Coals, 1.400 tons general, 120 to.-is; Cape Town Coals, 620 tons Dakar: Coals,600 tons; St Helena: Coals, 434-tons Paysandu Coals, 568 tons; coke, 33 tons; Rio Grande: Patent fuel, 159 tons; Tocopilia: Coals, 600 tons; general, 10 tons Rio Grande do. Sui Patent fuel, 145 tons Para Coals, 321 tons. NEWPORT TRADE REPORT. [SPECIAL REPORT FROM OUR OWN CORRESPONDENT.] NEWPORT, Thursday Night.—The exports or coal for the past week to foreign countries, ex- clusive of bunkers, is something like 5,000 tons over last week, and comes up to about our average quantity, though not to so high a figure as we have lately been accustomed to. The arrivals even of steamers have, in some cases, been hin- dered or delayed by the strong north-easterly winds that have prevailed, aud which have enabled a large number of wind-bound vessels to proceed to sea. The docks and wharves aro therefore not so well provided with tonnage. Freights have not materially altered. In some particular cases, and where tonnage was much wanted, higher rates have prevailed, but on the whole the market is flat. It is, however, worthy of note that many owners refuse to entertan. business at present quotations, as there IS D"i: margin of profit. Wmicrhfc! ■ ,r The coasting trade is quiet. 6 are lo\V> and the demand tor coal ft"10 ace weather will probably Sive thls tfade a slight ""There is no alteration in prices of coal generally. Small steam is scarcer, and worth more monev. Vvnorts coal for the week ending 14-th Jan. ToScL-East Indies, 2,200 tons; River Plate, 712; Brazlls, 440; Guadaloupe, 2,014; Egypt, 2 000; Malta, 1,650 Italy, 4,750; Fiance (Me- diterranean), 2,150 Spain (Mediterranean), 1,850 Gibraltar, 2,640; Spain (bay ports), 1,860; France (bay ports), 4,866; France (northern ports), 2,140 total, 29,272 tons. I he ironworks of the district are fairly active there are a few vessels loading. The c earances ha ve consisted of one cargo by Rio O-rande, by sailer, one for Santos, by steamer, and another for Kotterdam, also by steamer. The imports have included 10,570 tons of iron ore from Bilbao, Porman, and Benisaf. J? wood is to hand, neither is there any particuiai demand for it. THE TIN-PLATE TRADE. (BY LBWYS AFAN.) The following were the quotations for Straits tin per ton on the first day of each month during the last ten years :— 1875. 1876. 1377. 1878. 1879. :e s. d. £ s. (I. £ s. d. £ s. «. £ s. d. Jan. 95 10 0 81 0 0 76 0 0 10 0 61 0 0 Feb. 91 10 0 80 0 0 73 10 0 63 0 0 60 0 C Mar. 90 0 0 73 0 0 72 10 0 64 0 0 62 10 0 AprU 89 0 0 73 0 0 70 10 0 63 10 0 £ 8 0 0 May 83 0 0 71 10 0 69 0 0 61 0 3 .Tune 83 0 0 7M 0 69 0 0 65 July 82 0 0 73 10 0 64 0 0 62 ° ° 65 10 0 Aug. 78 0 0 73 0 0 66 10 0 61 10 0 64 5 0 Sept. 62 0 0 71 10 0 65 0 0 68 0 0 70 0 0 Oct.. 8:3 0 0 72 0 0 65 10 g i0 0 ,5 0 0 Nov. 85 10 0 74 10 0 70 O 0 60 0 0 94 10 0 Dec. 82 0 0 7? 0 0 66 M u W 10 0 93> 0 O Jan 91 To ^2130X'o 109 ° 93 0 0 85 0 0 P«h q\ 0 8 90 10 0 10 0 92 0 0 76 0 0 Mnr" « 0 0 88 0 0 111 0 0 93 0 0 84 0 0 Anr 86 0 0 88 10 0 107 0 0 96 10 0 82 5 0 M £ v 82 0 0 87 10 8 97 0 0 97 0 0 82 15 0 S 71 0 0 88 0 0 9710 0 95 10 0 84 lo 0 Tnlv 84 0 0 89 0 0 95 8 0 94 15 0 83 15 0 An J 91 0 0 91 0 0 104 5 0 94 10 0 82 15 0 86 0 0 90 10 0 101 10 0 94 5 0 83 0 f Ort 83 0 0 95 10 0 107 0 0 95 10 0 79 15 0 Nov. 90 10 0 98 0 0 89 0 0 92 10 0 Dec. 93 0 0 105 10 0 97 10 0 86 10 0 THE WEST MIDLANDS IP ON, COAL, A D HARDWARE TkADKS. BIRMINGHAM, Thursday.—The qu.ut.rrir nseot- ings have not much swelled flnisneu iron makers' ■;rder books, but increased buying is expected in two or thrtw weeks. Ordinary oars were :£6, and common, £ 5 10s. Galvanised sheets of 24 suage, £ 11 5< to £ 11 10s, which means a drop of 30s on the twelve month. Best thin sheet limis quoted working-np qualities, £ 10 10*; corutivm tank plates, £ 7; common boilerplates, £ .-i^to £ 8. Native pigs tame; first quality, 00s. third quality, 56s. "I I rrinted and Published by the Proprietor* DAVID DUNCAN & SONS, at their Steam PriBtinc Works, 75 and 76, St. Mary-street, und W ettreet in the i 7