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THE OMNMUS. 1

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THE OMNMUS. [Thinp Seen and Heard by the Condacior.) Nexe week we are in for something great at the Palace. < One way to make your troubles grow it to tell them to others. During the week we have record of strik (e) ing events at Ammanford. When we begin to build up the virtues of a friend, we soon bury all his faults. Neither Here Nor There figured in the races on Saturday, and it was neither. Llandovery has been taxed with profiteer- ing. A case of follow the leader. » Ainmanford still going strong. This time in Genesis; and we are still looking for it. Ammanford Fair was blessed with glorious weather, and the kiddies had a most enjoy- able time. Due, presumably, to the shortage of fire- wood, a clothes-line prop has been missed from Tirydail. » It cost the Ammanford and District Chora: Society nearly £ .400 to go to Corwen. The prize was £ 75. There are those who will tell you that barbers' charges will be of the hair- raising" order. T h ere an e l ectrica l There appears to have been an electrical breeze at the Llandilo Urban Council meet- ing held last week. A member of a local Council is reported to have said that the cemetery was the only undertaking, that paid. Berach Bach started his career at the early age of 7 years, and, like a famous brand of whisky, is still going strong. Ammanford should have played Llandovery at cricket on Saturday last, but at the last moment the match was cried off. Carmarthen Rural District Council, on Saturday last, agreed to appoint a Local Tribunal under the Profiteering Act. A woman was A woman who is in her 90th year was cecently awarded a special prize for the personal cultivation of her allotment. The delightful accompaniment provided by the Brynamman Orchestra on Monday evening at Ammanford was highly commented upon. Probably he's been fishing," said the magistrates' clerk on Monday last, when the defending solicitor presented a witness named Roach. < A witness aged 90, giving evidence at the Ammanford County Court on Thursday last, said that he was able to read and write with- out glasses. We are not only going to attempt to get the National Eisteddfod to Ammanford, but we are going to get it."—Aid. W. N. Jones on Monday night. A horse named Selected came in first at the races on Saturday, but unfortunate ly 'twas not our" Selection," and preferred to Stand Alone." Some jubilants must have thought the Gamant United A.F.C. had been snowed under, writes a correspondent. King Sol came to the rescue. Rugby and Soccer football will in full swing at Ammanford on Saturday. The Rugbyites yppose Brynamman, and the Soccerites Gorseinon. ? The young ladies who walked at mid-night to Glynhir Falls, and on a tree near by pinned a note to record their exploits, must have been possessed of courage. ? The ribbon of the Victory Medal may now be worn by all members who are entitled to the award. A preliminary issue of two inches of the ribbon will be made. I So fully occupied with the glowing pic- ture of love presented at our cinema were the young couple, that they never even noticed that the light had been switched on, and lo! and behold. Referring to Lord Dynevor on Monday evening, Ald. W. N. Jones said that he owned us, we owned him, and between us all we are quite a happy family." And so say all of us. Father, please let me have sixpence to ,give to a poor lame man who only has one arm. That's right, my son; always help the afflicted. But who is the poor lame man? He takes the tickets at the circus." A great tribute to Mr. Aldridge, the stationmaster at Llandovery, who is leaving for Marsden, was conveyed in the few words spoken by an employee, at a presentation meeting held; recently, the latter adding: "He is not only a man but a gentleman." # The Bolsheviks have proclaimed ttie most wonderful Utopian ideals, but they have coupled them with the most cruel and wicked behavtour that would disgrace the Stone Age or the Hottentots of South Africa," declared Mr. Winston Churchill at the Criterion Restaurant. Medical Officer: Now, Sergeant, I am very much concerned as to the quality of the drinking water: what precautions do you take against infection? Sergeant: Well, Sir, first we boil it-" M.O.: Good." Sergeant: Then we filter it-" M.O.: Excellent- Sergeant: Then we drink beer." The head of a member of the finny tribe caused untold suffering a few evenings ago. Its brilliancy mingling wih thr darkness of the night, reminded Juliet of diamonds. She even came to the window in her nightdress, ■90 richly engrossed with her thoughts, but the striking of a match by a passer-by revealed the whole secret. The clerk approached his employer with the request that he should leave him off on the following afternoon, adding: My wife wants me to go shopping with her." The employer replied to the effect that owing to pressure of work it was impossible, where- upon the olerk said: Thank you very much air. You are very kind."

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