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#■'—■ IMPERIAL PARLIAMENT.
#■' — ■ IMPERIAL PARLIAMENT. HOUSE OF LORDS.—MARCH 28. Lord Cross, answering a question from Lord Arran, stated that the evidence given before rhe Royal Commission presided over by Sir Edward Fry would be laid before Parliament at an early date, it being now printed and only awaiting the revision of the digest. The report of the Commissioners, he added, required careful consideration by the Govern- ment and the Irish Land Commission, and no con- clusion could be arrived at until the evidence was available for reference. HOUSE OF COMMONS. THE POSITION IN CHINA. Mr. Davitt asked whether any papers relating to events in China were to be presented to Parliament this session and, if so, when? Mr. Curzon: Papers are being prepared, and will be laid as soon as possible. They will include the information received by H.M. Government relative to the requests for concessions by European Powers. It will not, I am afraid, be possible to present them before the Easter recess, the collection not yet being complete, and reference having to be made in several cases to her Majesty's representatives abroad, but we we pushing forward the papers with the utmost rapidity. Sir E. Ashmead-Bartlett: Will these papers also include the negotiations with Japan ? Mr. Curzon: I do not think this question is quite fair. I cannot at present recollect the negotiations with Japan to which my hon. friend refers. Mr. R. G. Webster asked the Under Secretary for Foreign Affairs whether he would cause a map of the Empire of China to be placed in the Tea Room for the use of members seeking information respecting that country. Mr. Curzon: Yes, sir, I shall have pleasure in com- plying with the requeet of the hon. member. Mr. Maclean Will the right hon. gentleman have the map altered so as to show the present state of China. Sir E. Ashmead-Bartlett asked whether Her Majesty's Government had received confirmation of the statement that the Chinese Government had accepted the Russian demands, which include the lease of Port Arthur as a fortified naval base, the lease of Talien-wan as the fortified terminus of the Trans-Siberian Railway, and a right to make a rail- way from Petuna to Port Arthur. Mr. Curzon said Her Majesty's Minister at Peking telegraphs that the Russian agreement with China was signed yesterday, but we are not yet aware of the actual terms. Sir E. Ashmead-Bartlett: I beg to give notice that I will to-morrow, or on the first favourable occasion, move the following resolution: That in thd event of the Government being unable to maintain the terri- torial integrity of the Chinese Empire, it is their duty to secure a fortified naval base in theGulf of Pechili; and it is their duty to secure that the Valley of the Yangtse Kiang and the West River shall be placed within the sphere of British influence." Mr. Ritchie, answering Sir Howard Vincent, said, according to the Chinese Custom Department, the imports into China from the United Kingdom and the rest of the British Empire in 1896 were nearly 27t millions sterling, of which more than half was for Hong Kong. Most articles paid Custom duties at the Chinese treaty ports, at rates nearly equivalent to five per cent. ad valorem. The rates on British goods levied by France in Indo-China, and by Russia in Eastern Siberia, were much higher. STATEMENT ON THE PAR EAST PROMISED. At the close of questions, Sir W. Harcourt asked Mr. Balfour to make such arrangements as would enable the Government, before the House rose, to make a statement with reference to their policy in the Far East. He did not ask him to state the exact arrangement, but Mr. Balfour would probably be able to do so to-morrow. Before the Easter Recess the House should have a statement from the Government of the position in which this country stood in the matter. He did not desire to press upon the Govern- ment anything inconvenient to the public service or injurious to the public interest, but since the declara- tions made by the Government on the first night of the session, which seemed entirely satisfactory, cer- tain circumstances had occurred, and the House should know whether the statement made by Ministers then still held good, or whether circumstances had altered these declarations. Mr. Balfour said the leader of the Opposition had aBpmssed a very proper desire that there should be some statement of the recent policy of the Govern- ment in the Far East and some opportunity given for discussing it. It was impossible that the whole subject could be adequately surveyed before the House separated for the Easter Recess, because the papers necessary for the discussion would not be in the hands of members. However, ha recognised not only that it was desirable, but that it was absolutely necessary that something should be said before the House separated. The only question was as to the most convenient time for making that state- ment. Negotiations were at this moment proceeding, and he could not tell the House when the Govern- ment would be in a position to make a statement. Of course, the later the statement could be put off the more chance there would be that the Govern- .ment would be able to speak freely and to give the House full information. It might, therefore, be desirable to defer the matter so late as to-morrow week. The Government had every wish for their own part to say what they had done, and to defend what they had done if it was to be attacked; but their hands for the moment were tied, and it might not be possible within the next few days to give the right hon. gentleman and the House the opportunity they so naturally and properly desired. Sir W. Harcourt entirely accepted what the right hon. gentleman had said. He had no desire to press matters, and he desired much more to have a state- ment as to the position of the country than to raise any particular controversy. GREEK LOAN BILL. On the motion for the second reading of this bill, Sir li. Ashmead-Bartlett said the Under-Secretary had made an astounding statement when he said the evacuation of Thessaly was a question of paramount European importance at the present moment. What about the questions in the Far East? Mr. Corzon I said European importance. Sir E. Ashmead-Bartlett said the right hon. gentleman should have expressed himself more clearly. Continuing, he declared that a policy of sham sentiment and false humanitarianism was at the base of all our feebleness abroad. It was this policy which necessitated the present loan. The bilt was read a second time. THE NEW GOVERNMENT BUILDINGS. The motion for the second reading of the Public Buildings' Expenses Bill was then brought for- ward, and after some debate the House divided. when there voted for the second reading 202, and against 19. THE PRISONS BILL. Mr. Dillon resumed the adjourned debate on the second reading of the Prisons' Bill. He condemned as an outrage the sending of children into a common prison. Mr. Davitt supported the rejection of the bill, though it showed some spirit of progress. He found no improvement in the rules dealing with penal servitude speech was still penalised among 'prisoners, but the food was slightly in- creased. He attributed the failure of the present i system to its very severity, and he contended that imprisonment shonld be made more effective by being made more reforming. He spoke of the ¥rison dietary as a scale of scientific starvation. he punishment diet was too inhuman to give to a dog. He admitted that the accounts he gave of the effects of inadequate diet, were disgusting and horrible details. But he was only telling the House what he had seen. The prison dietary in Australia was far better. Most other coun- tries were changing their prison work in the direction of teaching industries and tradss to the prisoners. He advocated agricultural work as eepeciaiiy suitable for prisoners. On the motion of Mr. T. P. O'Connor, the debate was adjourned.
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IN remote corners of the earth there are tribes who Re still in the Stone Age of culture, and ignorant of metals. Von den Steinem found them at the head- waters of the Xingu the Jesuits discovered them in • Alaska and the La Plata Museum now publishes an account of the Guayaquis of Paraguay, who dwell near the headwaters of the River Acarary. They are timid and harmless, shunning the whites, who ill- treat them. They use the bow, lance, and stone tomahawk, wear tall caps of tapir skin, and adorn their necks with strings of bone and teeth. They an.« broadheaded or bracycephalic, undersized and proge nathous, that is to say, their mouth projects like tha- of a negro. Dr. Ehrenreich regards them as akin tot the Botocudos of Brazil. THE Americans are about to build a railway to the Yukon goldfields, and 150iles will be in working order by September. The route ip by steamer to the mouth of Stickeen River, near Fort Wrangel, Alaska, by boat up the Stickeen to Telegraph Creek, and by railway to the head of Teslin Lake, 150 miles distant. Steamers run up the lake to where it discharges by the Hootalingua into the Yukon. ALL the slopes of Mount Wasatch, in the United jBtatea, are said to be covered with red snow. The colour is due to the presence of protococcus nivalis, a kind of microscopic plant that awarms.in the snow. THE membership of the New England Free Trade League bat increased by 141 aince the first of thia
OUR WORK IN EC4 '/PT. !
OUR WORK IN EC4 '/PT. In the statistical returns—1881-1897, just issued by the Government of Egypt, there is remarkable proof of the good results of English Government. During our administration improvements hare been going on in every department of the country, the natives no longer fearing illegal extortion or unjust punishment. The result of the blessings of security of life and property are abundantly illustrated in this singularly suggestive report by the financial adviser of the Government, Sir Elwin Palmer, from which we take the following: The population of Egypt has increased in 15 years by 2,920,486, or 43 per cent. Notwithstanding the increase of about 13 per cent. in the cultivated area paying taxes, the Land Tax is now less by £ E85.691 than in 1881. The average tax per feddan in 1881 was £ 1 2s. it ia now 18s. 3d. The annual tax on land has, since 1891, been reduced by £ E507,600, other direct taxes having been reduced by £ E223,000, and indirect taxes amounting to EE186,000 per annum have been abolished. The Tobacco Tax having been raised and the smuggling stopped, it now produces over a million, whereas in 1881. the revenue derived from tobacco only amounted to £ E97,168. Scarcely any arrears of Land Tax now exist, whereas in past years the amounts were very large. The expropriations and sales of crops for arrears have been reduced more than 50 per cent., and are now ui n quite insignificant. Since 1890, the policy has been to diminish the direct taxes, covering the loss of revenue by an in- crease in the indirect taxes, and thus causing a more even distribution of taxes and an increase in the number of taxpayers. The only indirect tax, how- ever, that has been raised is the tobacco tax, while others have been reduced or even abolished entirely. The taxation per head of population in 1881 was £1 2s. 2d.; in 1897 it was 17s. 9d.,a reduction of 20 per cent. Two hundred and twelve miles of new railway have been opened. There has been an enormous develop- ment of the railway and telegraph traffic, second- class passengers having increased from 415,000 to 1,153,000, third-class passengers from 3,100.000 to 9,412,000, and merchandise from 1,275,000 to 2,796,000 tons, while the number of telegrams have I increased from 688,000 to 2,498,000, half the number being on account of railway service. A similar development in the Post Office has taken place, letters, newspapers, money-orders, &c., having very largely increased in number. The expenditure on public instruction has been increased by 37 per cent., the number of schools has risen from 29 to 51, and the number of pupils from 5366 to 11,304. The increase in the judicial receipts shows that ths I people have learnt to take advantage of the courts, especially as regards registration of deeds. Large sums of money have been expended of late years on irrigation--i.e., on reproductive works- 1700 kilometres of agricultural roads, 2512 kilo- metres of drains, 3054 kilometres of canals, and 575 kilometres of basin bank have been constructed in the provinces. The number of men called out on corvee has been reduced from 281,000 to 11,000 men. Imports have increased by over E2,600,000, while, notwithstanding the enormous fall in the price of cotton and sugar, there has been only a slight falling off in the value of the exports. The quantity of salt sold has doubled, while the price has been reduced by close on 40 per cent. The tonnage of the Port of Alexandria has in- creased from 1,250,000 to 2,270,000. The amount of bonds outstanding on the market in 1881 was £ 98,376,660; in 1897 it was £ 98,035,780, notwithstanding E13,219,000 of fresh debt raised to cover extraordinary expenditure, and £ 3,400,000 in- crease of capital, due to conversion. The interest charge in 1881 was EE4,235,921 in 1897 it was EE3,908,684. The market price of the Five per Cent. Privileged Debt in 1881 was 96J; in 1897 the market price of the same debt converted into 3 per cent. was 102. 2 The Four per Cent. Unified Debt was at 71f in 1881, and at 106- ,1in 1897. The amount of debt per head of population was, in 1881, E14 8s. 9d.; it is to-day E10 Os. 2d.
" IMPERTINENT COMMANDS."
IMPERTINENT COMMANDS." Certain British Army subalterns have a curious grievance (says the Daily Mail) against their colonels or adjutants. To what extent this grievance affects the whole body of subalterns there are no available means of ascertaining but where the practice which is complained of is found to exist in several regi- ments, it is quite on the cards that it is not confined to those regiments, but is more or less general. Here, then, is a statement of the grievance of one of those concerned: "Officers in the army are public servants, and are paid out of the public purse. The public service does not allow trade monopolies. This being so, I would like to ask whether it is not against all the regulations of the service that, as is often done now, a colonel or an adjutant of a battalion or regiment should command their sub- alterns when joining to go for their accoutrements, &c., to the Army and Navy Stores, and, further, whether the adjutant should have the power to pro- hibit the subaltern wearing accoutrements not made at the stores ? Of course, if these officers hold trading shares in the stores, it makes it so much the worse. It seems preposterous on the face of it that, as now happens, certain newly-appointed subalterns re- ceive a notice from the officers commanding them, whether they like it or not, to go to the Army and Navy Stores for their accoutrements, to one particular tailor for their uniforms, and to one particular cap- maker for their caps, and if they do not do so they are liable to be refused permission to appear on parade in any of these things made elsewhere. By what possible right do these particular officers arrogate to themselves the power to issue and carry out these impertinent commands, and who are the Army and Navy Stores to have this monopoly as against the many tradesmen who, paying largely to the revenues from which these officers are paid, are yet to be excluded by the very men they help to pay from trade competition in their branches of the various trades concerned ?"
A YACHTING CELEBRITY.
A YACHTING CELEBRITY. Sir J. J. Coghill, Bart., eldest son of the late Vice- Admiral Coghill, is the subject of a short article in the Yachting World. For over 40 years Sir John Jocelyn Coghill has had a strong love for the sea and yachting. Sir John, who is the fourth baronet, was born in 1826. He served as a Lieutenant in the 59th Foot, and is a Justice of the Peace and Deputy- Lieutenant for the county of Dublin. While in Ire- land he resides at Glen Barrahane, Castle Townsend, co. Cork. Sir John has had a varied and extensive yachting career, dating from 1854, when be commenced with the racing cutter Fayaway, a 10-tonner. Cutters were his early love, the Fayaway being succeeded by the Sylph, a 20-tonner, and then the Zigana, which was also rated at 20 tons. Sir John's devotion to the sea, however, was allied to a strong fondness for fore- and-afters, and his trio of cutters was succeeded by a 30-ton yawl, the Water Lily, which in its turn gave way to his first schooner, the Windward, 36 tons. The favourite cruising-ground of Sir John Coghill is the south-east and east coasts of Ireland. He ha, also spent a good deal of time in Scotland and on the south coast of Ireland. In 1858, along with his old friend, the late Capt. Henry, 4th Dragoon Guards, Sir John took the 125-ton schooner Mariquita to the Mediterranean. One of Sir John's pleasantest recollections is the memory of his experience as one of the crew of the 50-ton Fife-built cutter Cymba in what was probably the first Corinthian match ever sailed. The race took place at Kingstown in Cymba's first season, when she won everything. It was not a very easy matter in those early days to get together racing crews cf amateurs, and the owners of the 11 boats which were entered for the event were on the hunt for capable Corinthians for many months before the date fixed for the race. The conditions were that no paid hands be allowed on board except the skipper, who was forbidden to touch a rope or the tiller. The Cymba won the 100-guinea Cup, which was the prize offered. On the day of the race it blew so hard and the sea was so nasty that only four out of the 11 entrants started, the winner being under double-reefed canvas.
SMART SMUGGLING TRICK.
SMART SMUGGLING TRICK. A very unique smuggling scheme was unearthed a few years ago by the United States Secret Service officers in North Dakota. It was noticed that an un- usually large number of cattle were being driven across the line to the North Dakota markets, and the Secret Service men planned an investigation. For some time their work was in vain, and they had about given up hope of discovering any unlawful operations when an accident revealed the fact that the nostrils of the cattle were stuffed with opium wrapped carefully in tin foil. In this,way each steer was worth twice its normal value. Hundreds upon hundreds of animals had been driven across the border with their nostrils loaded with opium, and it was estimated that the smugglers had cleaned up a profit of £ 5000 before the discovery was made.
[No title]
SALESWOMAK Mademoiselle, I can strongly recommend you this etyle of mantle. Only last week an intimate friend of mine became engaged in one just like it."
CURRENT SPORT.
CURRENT SPORT. The wind and the rain and the stormy weather that has prevailed all through Great Britain latterly spoiled all forms of sport, but the University Boat Race suffered on Saturday most of all, and what had promised to be an exciting contest was turned by the climatic conditions that prevailed into One of the sorriest processions that had been seen during the long series of encounters. That the better crew, ceteris paribus, won, seems reasonably certain, but had Dame Fortune, who has been so dead set against the Cantabs from the first, only given them the choice of stations, the result might have been reversed, for Oxford was immensely advantaged by the shelter of the Middle- sex shore, and almost from the first the Cambridge boat was full of water. Under the circumstances it might have been better to have postponed the race, but the course is attended by so many inconveniences that one can well understand the unwillingness on both sides to adopt it. In the Association Football International on Saturday at Belfast the Irishmen took the field with the hope high of breaking the monotonous succession of Scotch victories. But in spite of their fine dash and resolution, they could not break through the fine defence of the Scotchmen, and three times the visit- ing forwards, playing with admirable combination, got through, the Irishmen being thus beaten by three to nil. The result seems to point to another success for the Thistle on Saturday next, for the Englishmen only beat the Irishmen by an odd goal. Two important local Association football Cup Competitions were decided on Saturday-the Lanca- shire and the Birmingham-and in both First League were beaten by Second Leaguers. There was a time when the Blackburn Rovers beheld the insignificant- looking "old pot" side by side with the handsome Lancashire Cup among their trophies but now they have fallen on evil days, and their sideboard is as bare as Mother Hubbard's cupboard, for Newton Heath knocked them out in the Lancashire final. Similarly Wolverhampton Wanderers were once holders of the Association Cup; on Saturday they ould not even beat Walsall for the Birmingham Cup. The Scotch Cup was, as expected, won by the Glasgow Rangers, though Kilmarnock made a better fight of it :han some anticipated. Saturday's games leave the First League Association Football table in a very interesting condition, for the leaders sustained another defeat, this time from West Bromwich Albion, who thus come again into the running for first place, being four points behind United, with two games in hand. Sunderland, how- ever, were left only one point behind, with a game in hand, and. unless the leaders improve on recent form. the Northerners are likely to get to the top for the fourth time. By beating Sheffield Wednesday, Stoke bettered their chances of escaping the test matches, and Notts drop back to 15th place, Bury still being the wooden spoons. After their hard game at the Crystal Palace on Thursday of last week, and with two men, including their goalkeeper, on the injured list, Notts Forest did not seem to have a rosy chance against Aston Villa, even with the advantage of ground. Buttheyquite outplayed the Villans and won easily, going up to seventh place in the table. This left them three points ahead of Derby County, the other finalists, with two games in hand, so that it must not be thought that the final is a moral for the County. Newcastle United's position as runners up in the Second Division of the League competition is now practically assured, even if they lose all their re- maining games, for Manchester City, who now occupy third place, are seven points behind with only five games to play. There is very natural disappointment in the South at the result of the replayed semi-final for the Association Cup last week, for the appearance of Southampton in the final would have given a rare fillip to football in the South. Southamp- ton were distinctly unlucky to lose, for while they failed to take advantage of the strong wind in the first half they had the best of the play for the greater part of time after crossing over, and they had to face a driving snowstorm at the finish when the two goals were scored in such sensational fashion. At the same time, no one will grudge the Reds" their victory, for they have ever been good sports- men, and it was their fifth appearance in the semi- final. In Rugby football the concluding stage of the County Championship was reached on Saturday in the tie between Northumberland and the Midlands at Coventry. Unfortunately, bad blood between the Leicester and Moseley Clubs led to the weakening of the home side, who were further without Unwin, the International half-back, who is on the injured list. Their prospects were therefore not highly fancied, but still one hardly expected the very decisive victoryof the Northerners, who had the best of the game from the start to the finish, and won by a substantial margin. The Northumberland forwards were both fast and heavy, and their backs much cleverer than their opponents'. J-. F. Byrne was rather disap- pointing. The House of Commons and the Brigade of Guards Point-to-Point Races came off on the Bourton Estate, near Buckingham, on Saturday afternoon. Owing to adverse weather and a strong, biting easterly wind, the spectators were limited. There were 12 entries in the House of Commons race, with eight starters. Mr. J. W. Phillips's Oliver, ridden by Mr. J. A. Pease, came in first; Mr. W. Raymond Greene's Dundas, ridden by owner, second; Hon. E. Douglas Pennant's Admiral, ridden by owner, third; Sir Samuel Scott's Joan, ridden by owner, fourth Mr. W. Raymond Greene's Sphinx. ridden by the Hon. R. George Verney, fifth; and Lord Willoughby de Eresby's Springtime, ridden by the owner, sixth. Oliver won easily. For the Brigade of Guard's Race the Coldstream Guards scored 71 marks, securing first place; the Grenadier Guards 50 marks, or second place; and Scots Guards 37 marks, third place. Mr. T. Lloyd, on Mr. W. Darell's Pilot, passing the winning post first. The council meeting of the National Cyclists' Union was held in London on Saturday, a large number of delegates being present. Mr. R. Todd presided. The treasurer's report showed that the union was in a sound financial condition. The pro- position by the Sussex Centre, that the licensing fee for professional riders be reduced from 5s. to 2s. 6d. was lost, as also was the proposition by the Man- chester Centre, that only licensed judges should officiate at race meetings. The proposition by the Professional Licensing Committee that In the event of any race being postponed the Centre Com- mittee shall have power to make compensation to any extent" was carried. The chief officials of last year were re-elected. The voting for the General Com- mittee resulted as follows: Messrs. Blair (41 votes), Hallowell (38), Lonsdale (35), Hail (35), Swire (33) Buss (32), Graves (31), Sansom (30), Campbell (28) Owen (27).
PROMOTION FOR TAMMANY MEN.
PROMOTION FOR TAMMANY MEN. It is a fortunate thing to enjoy the favour of Richard Croker nowadays. Three years ago Captain Devery was one of the victims of the Lexow investi- gation and was dismissed from the police force. He took his case into the Courts, which ordered his rein- statement. With the return of Tammany to power he has been promoted with railroad speed. On January 7 he was made a police-inspector. Seven days later he was made a deputy chief. Now he is assigned to duty in the borough of Manhattan, thus ranking next to Chief McCullagh. Many believe that it will not be long before he becomes McCuUaglis successor. Devery owes his good fortune to the fact that he is a favourite of Croker, and to the desire of Tammany to vindicate in a signal manner all thoJ whom it believes were persecuted by the Lexow Committee.
PURGING THE BOURSE.
PURGING THE BOURSE. The effect of the repressive Bourse legislation re- cently passed by the French Chamber of Deputies against the coulisse or open market will be the trans- ference of the large markets, especially in mines and stocks such as Spanish and Turkish, to Brussels. The agents de change, in whose favour the Bout re Re- organisation Bill was passed, only number 60, but will be increased to 75, and these will correspond to the whole Stock Exchange in London. Paris will thus ( to be a great financial centre, and all busi- ness involving the element of speculation will be transacted in Brussels.
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OF the making of new bishops the Sheffield people seem to desire an end. At least, the Archbishop of York has been driven to the opinion that there is little chance that the cutlery town will accept his offer to surrender £ 1000 a year from his arcliiepis- copal income in order to make a See at Sheffield. The archbishop now talks of an appeal to the whole of South Yorkshire for assistance in the matter. THE town authorities of Bonn have established a curious tax. A projecting window or balcony pays 50 marks (£2 10s.) a year, and every additional balcony or projection over it 25 marks.
THE FAR EAST. --
THE FAR EAST. WAR PRECAUTIONS AT HONG KONG. The Times Hong Kong correspondent says that orders were issued on Friday of las-, week that the naval establishment should make urgent preparations to place itself on a war footing. The staff has been temporarily augmented, and is working night and day. The French cruisers have gone north-avoiding Hong Kong. A despatch from Peking states that on S un- day M. Pavloff, the Russian Charge d'Affaires, was to sign the agreement with China regarding the lease of Port Arthurand Ta-lien-wan to Russia, and the right of constructing a railway to both ports. Port Arthur was to be handed over on Monday. China retains sovereign rights over Port Arthur and Ta-lien-wan, and these ports will be open to warships of all nations. It is probable that the forts at Port Arthur will be taken over by the Russians. The Chinese Government has decided to open, as a treaty port, Fu-ning-fu, in the province of Fo-kien.
■■,—— FIRE AT BROCKLESBY HALL.i
—— FIRE AT BROCKLESBY HALL. Brocklesby Hall, the residence of the Earl of Yarborough, was almost destroyed by fire on Sun- day. The fire broke out on Saturday in one of the chimney flues, but was extinguished by Lord Yar- borough's Fire Brigade. Unfortunately, however, it broke out again at nine o'clock on the following morning, and this time was not subdued until irre- parable damage had been done. The house brigade was unable to cope with the flames, and assistance was sent from Grimsby, but the fire obtained such a hold that the library, the dining hall, and all the chief bed-rooms were burnt out. Two valuable paintings were destroyed. Lord Yarborough per- sonally conducted the salvage operations, and one hundred servants and farm labourers were engaged in fighting the flames and saving pictures, furniture, and other valuables. Most of the books were burned, but the valuable Worsley collection of manuscripts was fortunately saved. Lady Yarborough and her chil- dren are in London. Lady Yarborough's beautifully decorated boudoir, which is so greatly admired by all visitors to Brocklesby, escaped damage by the fire, but the room was deluged by water. The damage will, it is expected, fall not far short of £ 20,000. The pro- perty is insured, but there will be a loss sustained by the destruction of the books and various heirlooms in the hall that cannot well be covered by in- surance.
THE SOUDAN.
THE SOUDAN. MAHMUD'S RUSE. Deserters from the Dervish camp at Hilgi agree in reporting that Mahmud's force is very short of food. Every day he issues orders for an advance next morning, but on the following morning announce that he has had an inspiration that his followers must not march, because the Turks are coming to attack them and to be annihilated. A special correspondent at Ras el Hudi says that there appear to be only three courses open to Mahmud—to remain where he is and go to pieces from want of food; to fall back on Shsndy, in which case he will lose all his prestige and disobey the Khalifa's commands; or to advance on Berber, when he will have to fighr. the Sirdar.
SPAIN AND THE UNITED STATES.
SPAIN AND THE UNITED STATES. A CRITICAL SITUATION. The Spanish Government is taking measures to have the report of the Spanish commission on the Maine disaster communicated at the earliest pos- sible moment to President McKinley, and if it be not laid before Congress it is understood that the Spanish Minister in Washington will print it at the cost of his Legation. The im- pression in Madrid is that the United States contemplate an early intervention in Cuba. The American Minister has made a statement to the effect that the President of the United States desires peace with Spain and peace in Cuba, and that he himself, so long as he is accredited to the Spanish Government, will work in that direction. A despatch from Washington says the Spanish Government has telegraphed officially that it holds the Maine disaster to have been due to an internal explosion.
MR. GLADSTONE.
MR. GLADSTONE. AS FAVOURABLE AB CAN BE BXPBCTED." The following report was posted at Hawarden Castle on Sunday evening "Owing to the stormy and wintry weather Mr. Gladstone has not been out to-day. Dr. Dobie this afternoon met Dr. Hubert Biss, and found Mr. Gladstone's condition as favourable as could be ex- pected." Mrs. Gladstone attended morning service at Hawarden Church, as did Mrs. Drew and Miss Dorothy, Mrs. Dumaresq, and Afr. Henry Gladstone. PUBLIC PRAYERS. On Sunday morning, at the Greek Church of St. Sophia, Bayswater, the Archimandrite Paraschis, who was the celebrant at the Holy Eucharist, made an eloquent appeal to the congregation in reference to the subject of Mr. Gladstone's health. Addressing the worshippers, he said, with great feeling: Brethren, this morning I desire that you will join with me in praying that our Heavenly Father may y in His great mercy relieve from suffering and restore to health an illustrious Englishman, eminent in many walks of life, distinguished in the Senate and at the university, but throughout a long career one who has always been a true-hearted servant of God and a loyal servant of tho Cross. William Ewart Gladstone is bound to our nation by a thousand ties of affectionate regard and service. But he ia more than the friend of Greece. He is the cham- Sion of all that is noble, and pure, and humanising. [is magnanimity has shone forth in a dark world like a bright ray of sunshine. Let me, therefore, invite you not merely as an Orthodox priest, but as a man speaking to men to pray that he may be spared to his family, to his country, and to man- kind. The Archimandrite then proceeded with a special prayer for the veteran statesman, the congregation betraying signs of deep emotion. Archbishop Walsh, having been informed that in- fluenza prevails to a great extent in his diocese, hat issued a letter removing the obligation of fasting during the remainder of Lent, except on certain specified days. In the concluding part of his lettei he says he has been asked to remind the faithful of the a duty they owe to the aged and suffer- ing statesman to whom Ireland is mainly indebted for more than one great measure of justice. Tin letter proceeds: Withdrawn for ever from the connections of publi< life, Mr. Gladstone in his present state of patient suffering attracts the sympathy not only of those who in his years of energetic public service venerated him as a political leader, but also, and perhaps even more especially, of others who in public offices were his strenuous opponents. From a respected Irish Catholic gentleman the thoughtful suggestion has eome within the last few days that if any oppor- tunity presented itself I should ask the faithful of the diocese to discharge some portion of the debt of gratitude which we owe to Mr. Gladstone by now remembering him in our prayers before the Throne of Mercy. I feel grateful for the suggestion. Doubtless through this letter it will be the means of obtaining for our venera,blebenefactor of former years many prayers, and in particular a prayer that God in whom he always trusted may now in his hour of suffering be pleased to send him comfort and relief to lighten his heavy burden, and to give him strength and patience to bear it, in go far as in the designs of Providence it may have to be borne for his greater good.
THE PREMIER'S HEALTH.
THE PREMIER'S HEALTH. Jwd Salisbury was allowed to go through an extra quantity of work on Saturday when the state of the weather necessitated his putting off his departure for the Riviera. It was then settled that the Premier, with Sir W. Broadbent and the Hon. Gwendolen Cecil, Lord Salisbury's daughter, should leave Charing-crosit oh Monday morn- ing at eleven o'clock for France. Lady Salisbury had been at Beaulieu for ten days, and everything was in readiness for the Premier, for whom was reserved a special cabin on the Dover and Calais boat, and special saloons on the English and French railways. Lord Salisbury will continue, while abroad, to transact such urgent Foreign Office business that Air. Balfour and the Duke of Devonshire may think it advisable to submit. There is every hope that with good weather the marquis will be able to take much outdoor exercise.
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A WONDERFUL feat in dancing is recorded from Berlin. At a recent ball, a prize of a gold ring was offered to the lady who waltzed the longest without stopping. Twelve couples competed. They began, waltzing at 12.30 a.m., and It was 5.45 a.m. before the winner and her partner stopped waltzing. By 2.20 five couples had dropped out, and at 4.15 another lady fainted. Two more couples dropped out at 4.45, and at 4.50 only two couples remained on the floor. The lady certainly deserved a gold ring for, all that exertion. THB busiest time on the Atlantic cable is between the hours of ten and twelve in the forenoon. During that time, on an average, about 900 messages pass over the cables each way. THE total income of the various Protestant mis- sionary societies in Great Britain and America for last year reached £ 2,600,137. These societies had 11,659 missionaries, male and female, in the mission field, assisted by 64,290 native helpers.
LEVEN BODIES FOUND IN A 1…
LEVEN BODIES FOUND IN A 1 CELLAR. | A gruesome discovery has been made in a Con- gregational Chapel at Philadelphia. The building was under repair, and the sexton and his assistant were clearing out an accumulation of fire refuse in the celiar. Many cartloads of the rubbish had baen removed when suddenly the assistant was pre- cipitated into a hole. He was assisted out again by the sexton, and further examination revealed the fact that the pit contained seven boxes each of which con- tained the remains of children. The Sexton's story is as follows: Roddy, my assistant, stepped into a hole, or at least he thought it was one. We both took the lamp and looked into the hole, and were more than surprised to find a box in it, and, lifting it up, found the remains of what might have been an infant child. How it came there I don't know. The officers are trying to find out all about that, and there are six other boxes just like it to find out something about. Of course, I told the police about what we had found, and they took charge."
BARGAINS AT THE ZOO.
BARGAINS AT THE ZOO. The readiest source from which to fill up lacunas in the Zoo is (says a writer in the Windsor Magazine) the stock-in-hand of the wild beast dealers, such as the Jamrachs, Cross of Liverpool, or the surplus stock of foreign menageries, or of men like Mr. Hagenbeck, of Hamburg, who both own menageries and import wild animals obtained by their collectors abroad. The first expensive purchase made for the Zoo was an Indian rhinoceros, bought in 1834. The price was merely alluded to as heavy but, as for that year the cost of purchasing animals was £ 1200, while in the previous year only E160 was spent, the animal probably cost not much less than £1000. The society had extraordinary luck in their rhinoceros collecting, whether by purchase or otherwise, though the animals cost a small fortune. In 1875 they bought of Mr. Jamrach a rhinoceros, never before seen in Europe, for the great price of £1250. This was believed to be a Sumatran rhinoceros, though it came from Chittagong. A few months later some un- doubted Sumatran rhinoceroses were shipped to England, and one was purchased, also of Mr. Jamrach, for E600. This was found to differ from the first, which was not only a new species, but at that time the only specimen known to exist! It was named the "hairy-eared rhinoceros," and several have since been obtained. Another rhinoceros, from the Straits of Sunda, was then bought for E800, so thf.t at a cost of E3850 the Zoological Gardens were able to exhibit all the species of rhinoceros found in Asia. Other high prices paid are £100 for the first chimpanzee, £ 800 for a young hippopotamus, and E600 for a giraffe. Some of the most interesting animals seen from time to time in the collection are deposited "-in other words, they are left at the Zoo as a loan. Some- times they are accepted to oblige the owners some- times, on the other hand, the owner confers an obligation on the society by lending them. Occa- sionally the owner wishes to sell a rare animal, which the society is indisposed to buy, but is glad to exhibit, while the creature, like a picture hung at the Academy, is more likely to find a buyer.
THE WORLD'S NAVIES.
THE WORLD'S NAVIES. The Army and Navy Year Book" rates the navies of the world as follows: 1, Great Britain 2, France; 3, Russia; 4, Italy; 15, United States; 6, Germany; 7, Spain; 8, Japan; 9, Austria; and 10, Netherlands. Under present naval contracts Japan in 1899 will go to the fifth place, crowding down the United States and Germany one point.
THE ROMAN'S HIDDEN TALENT.
THE ROMAN'S HIDDEN TALENT. A well-known antiquarian of Rochester, Kent, writes: "A labourer brought me a choice gold solidus 'of Valentinian the Second, as fresh as the day it was minted. He found it in a hole carefully tilled up with flints in Dully Wood, Doddington. I wonder who the Roman was who hid his talent in the earth?"
JEWS AND MONEY LENDERS.
JEWS AND MONEY LENDERS. A paper which addresses itself to the juveniles of the Jewish community, Young Israel, has been speak- ing out against the doings of the usurers, and the money-lenders in their turn have written strong letters to this well-conducted little journal. Ac- cording to an article in the present issue the letters ore of two classes. There are those who have written denouncing us for what we have said, and using the paltry argument of threat. These, one and all, might have saved themselves the trouble, for in any- thing that we may say upon this matter, we are amply prepared to take any consequences which these individuals care to, or think they can, employ against us. Then there are those whose threat has taken the lowest form of all, a form which only such an individual as an usurer could devise, for they have written warning us of the with- drawal of their subscription to our paper. In each case, we have gladly accepted their offe. Rnd we shall be delighted if their good example is followed by any other usurers, so that our subscription list may be purged of those whose names upon it can do it noth- ing but harm. Another class of protesters are those who have written and asked, What has this to 00 with a paper like Young Israel? We will tell them. If we have any raison d'etre at all, it is that we should be especially the organ of the younger members of our community, and we know of our knowledge two things-first, that thousands and thousands of our young co-religionists are in- duced to place themselves within the toils of the money lenders' clutches, by reason of the allurements held out, in order that they may gamble in one manner or another. Cases have come to our knowledge in which young Jews have found facilities by their intimacy, as friends of usurers, for entering into money-lending transactions; and the end of it has been that after years of bondage, in which the debt has been paid many times over, they have had to release themselves from a burden of liability-which notwithstanding all the payments, has never grown less-by exiling themselves to a far distant country. And, in the next place, we feel it our duty to warn young Jews against entering into this vile and nefarious calling. It is an occupation which yields its fruit, but that fruit is never other- wise than bitter. The usurer mostly makes money, it is true; but we have never known one who could truthfully say that he was a happy man. Shunnec by friends who are worthy the name, ostracised as he is like a moral leper by the community, the finget of scorn is pointed avhini wherever he goes. Pachy- dermatous he may be, but the consciousness of the ruin and degradation which everywhere follow him must rack his very being so that he comes at last him- self to loathe and detest his own occupation. None the less, he is seldom able to desist from it; for the curse of the spirit that caused him to enter into it and to carry it on in nearly every instance clings tc him like a veritable Old Man of the Sea. A few days ago, as most of our readers will be aware (continues Young Israel), Sir George Lewis, whose experience of the evil done by these usurers must be almost unique, spoke out, and spoke out well, before a Committee of the House of Commons which is now sitting to consider the question. We do not think it necessary here to refer in detail to Sir George's evidence, but there was only one small point to which we must take exception, and in regard to which doubtless Sir George was misin- formed. He spoke of these usurers coming from Poland and Jerusalem. As to the latter, we know of only a single case, and, as to the former, although we know some very bad instances, still English Jews have produced usurers as bad in every way as their foreign brethren. Sir George Lewis spoke of a notorious money-lender of the West-end, who doubt- less had wrought untold evil in aristocratic circles, but perhaps a worse case could be cited from the East-end, where a money-lender has, at this very moment, in his clutches an immense, number of struggling Jewish artisans and small Jewish traders, and, we especially regret to say, not a few of our ill- paid ministers. In every case he carries on his trade with a relentlessness and an energy which neither the misery of his victims nor their helplessly hope- less circumstances prompt him to mitigate. We congratulate Sir George Lewis upon having been able to lend such powerful stimulus and excellent advice to the Committee of the House of Conjipon? which is now sitting, and as a Jew to utter in behalf of his co-religionists so practical a protest. Thus he carries out the tradition of our people—if we produce the bane, we produce, too, the antidote if we evolve the poison, we evolve, too, the cure.
SOME GILBERT WHITE LETTERS.
SOME GILBERT WHITE LETTERS. The Manuscript Department of the British Museum has acquired by purchase the original letters on V The Natural History of Selborne," written by Gilbert White to Thomas Pennant, between, 1767 and 1773. The letters are remarkably interesting and valuable, and were returned to White, when he first conceived the idea of writing his famous natural history. The Museum has also secured Gilbert White's original manuscript of his Garden Kalendar," from 17.51 to 1767—a most important work which has never been published. It is in the form of a consecutive diary, recording the writer's almost daily operations on his I own land, and notes of the results of his garden ex- perimonta.
POLLING AT MAIDSTONE.
POLLING AT MAIDSTONE. Polling took place at Maidstone on Saturday for the election of a Parliamentary representative in the room of Sir F. Seager Hunt (Conservative), resigned. The candidates were Mr. F. S. W. Cornwallis (Con- servative) and Mr. John Barker (Liberal). Voting was carried on under great disadvantages so far as the weather was concerned. The roads, in conse- quence of the thaw which set in, were in a very bad condition, and there was consequently delay in bring- in" up outlying electors. The result was declared at night as follows: Cornwallis (C.) 2214 Barker (L.) 2036 Conservative majority 178 The result was received with loud cheers by a large crowd, who, in spite of the inclement weather, had gathered around the entrance to the Town Hall since eight o'clock. In a short speech the successful can- didate thanked the electors for returning him to represent. them in Parliament. Out of the 4800electors on the register 4290 voted. The results of previous elections have been: 1885. Major A. H. Ross (C.) 2184 Major M. S. Hume (L.) 1839 1 -< Conservative majority 345 1886. Major A. A. H. Ross (C.) 1917 Mr. T. P. Baptie (L.). 1603 Conservative majority 314 Bye-election, December, 1888. Mr. F. S. W. Cornwallis (C.) 2050 Mr. J. Barker (L.) 1865 Conservative majority 185 1892. Mr. F. S. W. Cornwallis (C.) 2443 Mr. T. W. Nussey (L.) 1627 Conservative majority 816 1895. Sir F. Seager Hunt (C.) returned unopposed. Mr. Fiennes Stanley Wykeham Cornwallis, of Linton-park, near Maidstone, is the eldest son of the late Major Fiennes Cornwallis, of the 4th Hussars, and grandson of the late Mr. Charles Wykeham Martin (M.P. for Newport and West Kent), of Leeds Castle, Maidstone, who married as his first wife Lady Jemima Maria, daughter of the last Earl Cornwallis. He is also a nephew of the late Viscountess Holmes- dale, Lady Julia Mann-Cornwallis-, who was the last surviving child and heir of James, the fifth and last Earl Cornwallis, and on whose death in 1883 he inherited the Linton Estate, a portion of the property of his great grandfather. He was born in 1864, and was educated at Eton, and is a magistrate and deputy- lieutenant for the County of Kent. Mr. Cornwallis is not new to the House of Commons, having been elected in December, 1888, for the borough, in the vacancy caused by the death of Major Ross. He was again returned in 1892. At the general election of 1895 he retired on the ground of ill-health. He is the 49th new member returned to St. Stephen's since the last general election, his return on the present occasion making no difference in the balance of political parties.
A CLOAK BY DAY, A COVERLET…
A CLOAK BY DAY, A COVERLET AT NIGHT. In his cuetomary report about the Canary Islands, Mr. Consul Maclean remarks: Anyone visiting Tene- riffe must have observed the fact that each and every male peasant wears a cloak composed of an English blanket, drawn in at the neck by a leathern collar. These blankets may be seen in every state of wear and condition, from the new, glossy blanket of the well-to-do adult to the ragged remnant that half clothes the lad of 14. At this age, boys who until then have slept in the main cottage with their parents and the younger children, are relegated to out- houses and verandahs, and it can be easily under- stood that almost the first purchase made by a young peasant is an English blanket, his cloak by day and bed covering by night. But, in the hard times recently undergone, such purchases have been comparatively rare, and although it is difficult to obtain figures, I am credibly informed that the demand for this one article of British manu- facture has fallen 25 per cent. below the average. This is partly attributable to the reduction in the peasants' purchasing power, and partly to the drain on the population for recruits for Cuba. It appears to me that a lesson (applicable to all trades) is to be drawn from the matter of the blankets; namely, that a good article of manufacture once widely known amongst the country people, most conservative in their habits, will hold its own so long as its quality is maintained. No shoddy article would stand a month's wear as a blanket-cloak, and I have been informed by a Spanish merchant of high standing that an attempt to introduce an article from Spain resembling in ippearance the British-made blanket was a failure.
I EMPLOYMENT FOR EX-SOLDIERS.
EMPLOYMENT FOR EX-SOLDIERS. The report on recruiting recently issued gives a good deal of attention to this subject, showing in what direction the soldier who has earned his dis- charge may look for employment. Efforts to obtain a fixed proportion of the situa- tions as postmen have this year been crowned with success, as the Postmaster-General has recently ap- proved of arrangements under which one-half of the appointments as postmen will, in future, fall to ex- soldiers. The new scheme cannot, however, take effect immediately, as the telegraph messengers who were 16 years of age or more on September 1, 1897, have first to be provided for. The Commissioners of Customs have decided to reserve all appointments as Customs watchers for military and other pensioners. The First Commissioner of Works has decided to give preference to pensioners for employment as park-keepers. A large proportion of appointments as prison warders already falls to ex-soldiers. A new body—Inland Revenue attendants—was formed at Somerset House in the early part of 1897, and the War Office, by timely action, secured a fifth of the appointments for army pensioners. The wages are 22s. a week, but the body is a small one, and only four situations have so far been given to army pen- sioners. They all joined on March 1, 1897. The House of Commons' committees of 1876-77 and 1894-95 recommended that all appointments as messengers in Government offices should be made from persons who had served in the naval and mili- tary forces, and the" Instructions as to Civil Employment, at present in force state that in filling appointments as messengers in Government Offices preference will, as a rule, be given to army and navy pensioners. Candidates for these posts are selected from those on the official register kept at thfe War Office, which contains only the names of non-commissioned officers discharged with pensions, whose characters are recorded as "exomplary" or very good." Before being placed on the register the documents of each candidate are carefully examined by Colonel Borrett, Assistant Adjutant-General for Recruiting, and no man is entered therein whose character does not bear the closest investigation. In the War Office all messengerships are in future to be reserved for army pensioners, and, in the Treasury and the de- partments subject thereto, vacancies will, as a rule, also be given to pensioners. Army Reserve men and discharged soldiers who fulfil the necessary requirements are admitted into the ranks of the Metropolitan, City, county, and borough police. In the London City Police in 1896 there were 196 ex-soldiers. In the Metropolitan Police in the riallW year there were 2201, and intm. county and borough police 3904 were employed. A strong appeal wag addressed by the Secretary of State for War to the county councils, mayors, and provosts of the various corporations in England, Scotland, and Ireland, directing their attention to the claims of deserving soldiers to civil employment, and asking their co-operation and support to -hi; end. Tire replies to this appeal. so far as they lu.y been received, express sympathy with the object in view and a desire to further the employment of ex- soldiers on their return to civil life. The appeal has also resulted in increased applications by employers of labour both large and small for the services of ex- soldiers. In 1892 the principal railway companies promised to employ ex-soldiers in larger numbers than they had previously done, and it was estimated that they would annually absorb about 2000 men.
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WOMEN are notoriously bad shots. In Western Australia not long back the wife of a mine manager was christening an engine, and had to throw a chAni* pagne bottle at it. The locomotive was one of un- usually large dimensions, and she was only a couple of yards from it, yet she cleverly managed to miss it and hit her husband—a portly person-—below the belt, knocking him into a cistern ten feet deep and badly hurting him OHIO has produced a genius TYHQ wants Uncle Sam to. build warships of rubber. On a postal card addressed to Congress, dated from Ypn Wert, he points out that cannons or torpedoes can't pierce or go through rubber on hitting the vessel," and he adds that all missiles would rebound from the sides of a ship built on the lines suggested. THZRH are nearly 250,000 more men than women in Australia, and in new Zealand also women are in a minority.
- FTJN AND FAXCY.
FTJN AND FAXCY. MAID-SERVANT: "Professor—oh, professor! just think. I've swallowed apijil" Absent-minded Pro- fessor: "Never mind here is another one." WIFP '-Darling, there goes a wliom I re- fused." Husband: "Oh, where? I would like to congratulate him." THE CAMEL (to the Polar bear): "Oh, I don't know! You're not so warm." The Polar Bear: "Well, I don't see what you've got your back up about." JONES (picking himself up): It's all right, Miss—- I'm not hurt," Miss Bloomer: "It's all right. My new suit is ruined! you mean thing. Didn't you hear me ring the bell ?" SHE: Charley, the engagement ring you gave me has E. C.' engraved on it. I hope you were never engaged before." He: "Never darling! 'E. C.' stands for. well-er-well, that means 18 carat," PLRASH, ma, I don't want any of those cultured peaches." Cultured peaches, Johnny? What can you mean by that? The ones with specs on 'm.. MOTHER (suspiciously): If you haven't been IA swimming, how did your hair get so wet?" Little* Dick That's perspiration-runnin' away from bad boys wot wanted me to disobey you an' go ia swimmin. FOGG Fenderson is a good enough fellow, but. he is terribly slow at seeing a joke." Bass: Is he 1'1 Fogg: "He slipped on a piece of orange-peel the other day, and had a fall. Everybody laughed, but Fenderson couldn't see the point of the joke." Bass: "Not surprising." Fogg: He saw it about 21 hours later, however, when another fellow did the same thing." CHATTERTON I hear she's a good shot." Miss Anthropy: She ought to be. She uses lots of cl powder." THEY say he is short in his accounts, don't they ?" That is what they say but the fact is, he is short in his cash." SELFISH HUBBY: "Let's go to the exhibition to- night." Patient Wife I daren't leave baby, dear." Selfish Hubby: Well, I'll tell you what we'll do. IH go." SOME months ago, a gentleman went to fish off Blackpool Pier. He had been unsuccessful in catch- ing any fish, when one of the local loafers, who had been watching his non-success, hazarded this re- mark: I say, sir, what bait 'ave yer got on yer 'ook ?" Cheese," said the angler, who knew more. of fresh water than salt. Why, bless yer," said the loafer, there ain't no mice in there BORROWS Nellie, hand me my umbrella, will you ? It has commenced to rain." Mrs. B.: "I lent your umbrella to rr. Sweetfern last night." Borrows: What on earth did you do that for ? Didn't you know it was his ?" WHAT was the trouble at church this morning ?" inquired one Dakota citizen of another. I under- stand there was a row." Oh, it didn't amount to anything. Some of the members in the back pews threatened to shoot the minister unless he spoke louder. That was all." AND have you sufficient means, young man, to support my daughter in comfort?" Oh, yes provided I'm not ruined by the expenses of a long engagement. AN old lady, hearing of a pedestrian's "great feat," wondered why they didn't iAerfere with hiw fast walking. MRS. PRIM Your husband is quite literary, E am told." Mrs. Missit: Yes indeed. Why, with his books and papers he litters a room worse thamo anyone I ever saw." CUTTER There goes the liglft-weight champion- of England." Butter: That's so ? Who is he p Cutter: My grocer." JKNKINS "I don't like to make any complaint TO a neighbour, Mr. Tomkins, but your dog kept up a terrible barking all night." Tomkins Oh, thacis all right; he's used to it-won't hurt him a bit. Kind of you to mention it, however." AIIA I I have found the meanest man at last. What did he do ?" He's deaf, and has never fcoKl his barber." SHE Mr. Jilter does not pay his wife mucit attention." He: "No the only time I ever knew of his going out with her was once when the gas exploded." IT was Mr. Justice Maule who said, in answer to a witness who declared that he had been wedded 6D the truth from infancy: Yes, sir but the question is-how long have you been a widower ?" BEGGAR (piteously): Ah, sir, I am very, very hungry." Dyspeptic (savagely): -Then have the decency to keep your good fortune to yourself. I haven't had an appetite for years." ENAMOURED YOUTH: I beg you, sir, for the hand of your daughter. I cannot live without her." Old Grumps: Glad to hear it. I can't live with her. Name the day, young man, and have it soon." Enamoured Youth (backing off): Urn—er—please give me time to reflect." IT'S no use to feel of me wrist, docther," said Fat, when the physician began to feel his pulse; "the- pain is not there, surr-it's in jjiy hid entoirely." POUCE-SRI:GEANT Are you all ready for the raid on the gambling establishment?" Constable:" Yes. I notified the proprietor yesterday." AN American hostess has printed on her invitation cards, in one corner "Dancing at eight," and in the opposite corner: "Home, sweet home, at twelve o'clock." MADOE: I think Jack is going to propose to me soon, mamma." Her Mother Why do you say that ?" He took me out to look at a tandem bicycle last evening." TRAMP I called ter see, lady, if I could do sum work for yo." Kind Lady: "What can you do?" Tramp: "I'm a sort of dentist, mum. I want top advertise; so I'll put a set of teeth into a good pre. fer nothin' MANAGING EDITOR What was it that young fellow wanted ?" Office Boy: He says that he wrote a sonnet entitled 'Dolly's Dimples,' and it got into the paper headed Dolly's Pimples,' and that he wants it explained, as it got him into trouble with something he called his feeansay." A KANSAS farmer who could not get harvest-hands put this notice upon his fence: Itarvest hands wanted. Hired girl pretty and genial. Cabinet- organ music in the evening. Pie threo times a day. Three spoons of sugar with every cup of coffee. Hammocks, feather-beds, or leather divans at your option for sleeping. Rising hour nine o'clock in the morning. Three hours' rest at noon. Come one- come all." MAGISTRATE (to the accused): It appears that you gave the plaintiff a black eye?" Prisones: Yea, your worship, but I'm quite prepared to give him half a sovereign as compensation." Magistrate (to plaintiff): You hear what the defendant says, Are you willing to accept the half-sovereign?" Plaintiff (eagerly): "Rather! (To the defendant): Come outside, old chap, and black the other eye How long did you know your wife before you married her, Grims?" "Not a minute. Don't know her yet. Never will know her." I DON'T know anything more disagreeable than a. man who will not do what he can." "Oh, he is not in it with the fellow who insists on doing what he can't." IRATE FATHER When I die I shall leave you without a penny." Son:" Certainly. You're bound to. You e<tn't take any with you, you know—not even a penny." "WE are much worried about our Johnny." "Why?" Well, he is 12 years old and we haveit'fc yet caught him lathering his face with his fathev's shaving-brush." 0 Do you know Flo's engagement is broken off?- "No. How did it happen ?" He sent her a song called When We Were Young. A PONDEROUS basso having just completed a long solo at an afternoon concert, a little girl's voice was heard, saying, "Mamma, has the gentleman quite done garglin, TUB Magistrate It appears from your record that you have been previously convicted thirty-seven times." The Prisoner (sententiously): "Man is not perfect. Probably you have your faults." R HB: "Am I ever to have my way about anything?" She: "Of course you can have your way when your way is the same as my way, but when our ways a Be different, then I'll have my way." TOMMY; Did the fowl hurt, you, Mr. Higgs ?" Mr. Higgs: "What d'you mean, my boy? What fowl ?" Tommy: Well, I wanted to know if it hurt, 'cause mamma said you had been henpecked for twenty years." Old Gentlemen (jn omnibus, to young man who has not vacated his seat to accommodate a lady, severely) When I was young, sir, I would have got y 1:1 up and given the lady a seat." Young Man Then, sir, lam. sorry to see that you have lost your polite- ness with your youth." I REAR, dear, that you've broken your engage-- naent with Fred." "Yes, dear, we are unsuited to each other, all through the Early Closing Associa- tion." "The what,? The Early Closing Associ&> tion ?" Yes Our shop closes now- for the half day on Thursdays, and his office only closes early on Saturdays." Do you know your orders, sentinel?" was asked of a not overbright soldier on guard duty recently. Yes, sir," was the reply. Know the points of the compass?" continued the officer. "Yes, sir." "It you face the rising sun, your left hand would be on the north of you and your right hand to the south of you. What would be behind you ?" "My knapsack, sir." THB BARON: "Well, she won't marry me. She has accepted my rival, the Count." His Friend: You seem quite cheerful, however." The Barom: Oh, yee! the fact is, the Count and I pooled 01U issues. Our understanding is that if she marriea either. we divide the money."