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,-. )FIELD AND FARM

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IGARDENING GOSSIP.

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HOME RINTS.

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<'Yd, TYPICAL .TIFF.

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< 'Y d, TYPICAL TIFF. No tea ready ?" "You always want tea just when you see I'm busJ with baby." And you always want to be busy with baby just when you know that I'm coming home to tea." V Well, I should think you could wait a minute or two, when you see what a difference it makes to me." Apparently I have to wait an hour or two—that seems to >be the general rule. If six o'clock doesnt suit you for tea, why in the name of wonder don't you alter it, and fix it for half-paet, or seven, or any otksrtimeyoq like, only, for Heaven's sake, do keep to it when you have fixed it. But every day now it's the sime th/n^—' tea at six, tea at six, tea at And then t'm kept waiting for it till five minutes toiseven, or Ifwn&JpM* JkAd if I say a. single word, you grumble and say that I'm so unreasonable, and so cross 1" So, you are. You are cross and unreasonable. Why in the world need you have come blustering in like that, just when you knew I should be putting baby to sleep? In another five minutes she would have gone off nicely, and I could have taken her upstairs, while tea was being set. You never care a bit how tiled one gets, and how one's arms ache, nursing the dear little soul. All you care for is tea, tea, tea, just to the exact minute." Well, why in the world need yon turn this room into a nursery every afternoon, when you know that I am coming home at six o'clock? There's a com- fortable nursery upstairs-wily can't she go to sleep there, and then I shouldn't disturb her? You cant expect a man always to walk about on tip-toe in his own house. However, she's wide awake now—let me have her to play with for a little while, and you ring the bell and see about tea." Now is it likely? It would be nine o'clock at the very earliest before I could get her off, if you were to excite her now. I don't know what time you are likely to get your tea, as it is—"I shall be at least half-an-hour settling her—you've roused her up so already." "confound it all! Then 111 go without tea!" You needn't loenfound it all,' and you needn't go without your tea unless you wish to. I shall take the baby away, and you canning the bell and have the tea brought in. You'll have to have it by yourself, for I-shan't be ready, but I don't suppose youll par- ticularly trouble over that—it's your tea, not your wife that you are always in a hurry for now—it always used to be the other way—your wife you wanted, not minding about your tea. But times have changed." So has my wife. For she always used to lore looking after me, but now she is always too busy." She isn't. She does love looking after you. But J'ou are so exacting and jealous, you want all the ooking after to yourself, and seem to think that the baby doesn't matter at all." And you seem to think that the baby wants all the looking after, and that I don't matter at all. I don't suppose youll think it matters much if I spend my evenings at the club, so that you can look after the baby without interruption." •She est alone that evening, thinking things over, ami musing after this wise—" I wonder how soon he'll come home. I'll have a lovely supper ready by the time he does. But if he has gone to the clpb it wen't 'be any use, for hell have supper there. I wonder why I have grown so cross and irritable lately. I wish I 'hadn't let him go like that. It isn't so very strange after all that a man should like to find his tea ready when he comes home tired. And it it quite true, all heeays. I "always used to be on the look-out for him, and I never let him find me not •ready for him before by came. Little precioUB And it isn't her fault. But I can't help her waking up at the wrong moment. Men are so unreasonable —'they seem to think babies can sleep to order—that they ought to wfcke up like alarum clocks, at the time you set them for. Well,there's not much of the alarum clock about <our baby, unless it is an alurum clock that is permanently out of order—she certainly wakes one up pretty effectually too. But she has never yet, even once, woken up at the time her daddy appointed for her, and I don't suppose ehe ever will, so what's 'the use of worrying? "I don't know what to dÐ-Im sure I try to de my best. But I can't bear to leave her to a young nurse when I hear her crying. As for friends- well, of ccurse, there are her aunties ready enough to help me, >and'her bwo grannies who simply idolise her. But then, I never can make myself believe that anybody-else <ban mAage my biby. "But, oh dear, this is rather dull and dreary. Charlie spending his evenings at the club, because I'm cross, and because he's ciross too. I never thought being married was going to be like this—I thought 'he was going to pet me, and coax me, and be a devot.edwonm.,per at the shrine of all my fancies, for ever and ever. Breaming dreams, and seeing visions, is all very well, as long as you're engaged—. but you «oon get disillusioned after you're married. The dreaming doesn't last long after that, and the visions dont come true. I wonder why the world goes on marrying and giving in marriage—we all get warnings enough, and yet wean go on justthesame. Each one of us says: Oh yes, but then, my husband won't be like that ease will be quite different from the ordinary run of marriages—mine will be a new and improved edition of marriage!' Bo we all think, poor fools that we are; and we get married, and we soon find out, that we might just as well have profited by the universal experience, and believed the popular doctrine, for my' husband turns out just the same as everyone else's husband after all, and my' case doesn't prove itself the noteworthy excep- tion we flattered ourselves it was going to be. I wish he would come home, and Jet me make it up. I'll tell him that I didn't mean to be so eross, and that I'll be quite punctual to-morrow. How slowly the time goes, but it's getting terribly late, and the little special make-up' supper will be quite spoiled." And he. He spent the evening at the club—but it wasn't very successful somehow. There were so few members in. The evegjngpapers were dull. The billiard play was popr- The cAe/ was not in his usual form, and dinner had been no treat. He couldn't get absorbed in his boofc—he supposed be was tired. Somehow, everything seemed awry, and he felt rasped all over. Every^ now and then his mind kept going bacjc l^his she certainly had been aggravating.' Jt.^as bad enough to keep a man waiting for his ^meals, biik to argue with him when he was hupgrv-—no wonder^ couldn't keep his temper. jSpt still, yes, he certaifflj had been a little harsfy \So. doubt slra was tired, perhaps it was true that fie didn't consider how a 1,t won't go to sleep, *sears one out; nor how tiresome,it must be to have it\f9used upragain just^at thectritical moment, Besides, too, he had noticed that the had been looking a Jittle over-strained and Worn-out lately, perhaps, she wanted. a change-pit-was a long time since she had any sort of a holiday—how stupid of him not to think of these things sooner, instead of letting theM drift jnto" su% eftreqgpjt. & Well, he would séW abut it to-morrow, and make arrange- ments to ^tak^. her off somewhere atonce. He wouldn't imjpntient. anofheritim^ and then per- haps things would run smoother. But still, of course-well there's, no use dwelling on it—better forget all about it, and go on as if nothing had hap- pened, and treat the holiday as if it had come in the natural course things. One can't always be living at a lover's high pressure of sensationalism." At last it was time to go home. What! Not gone to bed, Edie? Tears, too, land not had supper? Why, it's nearly eleven o'clock!" I was waiting for you. I wanted to make it up, because I was so cross just now, but I won't be late again." Don't be so absurd, child. Crying' over that. Why, Edie, we can't go on for ever being sentimental lovers, we must settle down into practical people at last. Don't think any more about it, and I won't either. I had supper at the dab, so I shall go on upstairs. You had better have yours quickly, and come too. Youll make yourself ill, sitting up so late." She had supper by herself. She would have pre- ferred to leave it and go on being a sentimental lover, whose misery affects the appetite. But then, be had said they must leave off that kind of thing, and settle down—and it's very dull being a senti- Sental lover all by one's self-.o she choked back the tears and the lump in her throat, and tried to swallow her supper like a practical person."— Marion ElUtton, in Pearson's Weekly Extra Christmas Number.

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ART AND LITERATURE.

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FUN AND FANCY. - )

AMERICAN HUMOUR.

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