Barry Herald

YoUIfd taen try to air their knowledge; old men try to avoid airing their ignorance. DESPATCH from San Domingo states that General JXtpinez has been elected President; and Senor Vasquez Vice-President of the Dominican Republic. THE death is announced of Shakir Pasha, who was appointed by the Sultan Inspector-General of the Anatolian provinoes after the Armenian massacres of 1896. COLOWSL YERMOLOTT, the Russian Military Attache, ts accompanying Major General Boutowsky, of the Russian Army Staff, in hirVitHs to mflitaiy ertabtfsh- vsnts in England.

THE NEGLECTED PORT OF LONDON. Some time ago the Liverpool Journal of Commerce drew attention to the condition of the navigable channels in the Thames, and expressed the opinion that the port would be a serious sufferer if the Con- servancy authorities did not at once increase their dredging plant. Recently the newspaper published the gist of a letter written by Mr. Alfred S. Williams, of the Atlantic Transport Company, giving the re- marks very striking point indeed, for it showed not only that the approaches to the docks of the metro- polis are disgracefully neglected, but that the respon- sible authorities are themselves actually misleading shipowners as to the condition of the channels. It can scarcely be credited that in July last, when the Atlantic Transport Company wrote to the Con- servancy authorities asking that the channel to Tilbury should be dredged so as to allow vessels drawing 30ft. to come up the river at all states of the tide, the reply given was to the effect that the re- sources at their command were not adequate to meet the enormous expenditure which would be entailed.

THE KAISER AND THE CARICATURES. The Emperor William, it seems, takes the keenest interest in the caricatures of himself which appear in the English comic journals. These were very plenti- ful during the period of the famous telegram which his Majesty sent to President Kruger, and it was his habit, when sitting with his family in the evening, to amuse himself with looking over the Punch cartoons. He would laugh at the caricatures of himself until the tears ran down his cheeks. A lady who has an intimate acquaintance with the Imperial household says that the Emperor entertains the deepest affec- tion for his Boyal grandmother indeed, the Queen is the one monarch of whom Kaiser William stands in awe. A good thing, too.

A MOTOR WEDDING. Betrothed couples in Paris who go with the times I now drive in motor cars to church for the wedding ceremony. The latest of these up-to-date marriages has (says the Paris correspondent of the Telegraph) I been celebrated at Saint Germain l'Auxerrois, and I the very stones of the venerable sacred edifice, one et the most ancient in Paris, must have been shocked when this bridal party drew up to the porch, not in stately equipages, but in a long procession of some 20 horseless vehicles of the newest pattern. A large crowd had gathered to witness the arrival. Cheers went up mingled with humorous remarks when the cortege of motors appeared. The bride's and bride- j groom's carriages were decked out with white lilac, chrysanthemums, and ferns. The others were merely resplendent with brilliant new paint. After the cere- mony the party drove away to Saint Cloud, the mechanicians of the cars playing a kind of dis- cordant wedding march on the foghorns and trumpets.

THE NORTH NATAL BATTLE. GROUND. The bird's-eye sketch map published herewith shows roughly that part of North Natal where the principal battling of the war so far has taken plaoe. Sir George White's headquarters were at Lady- smith, and General Symons had his camp between Glencoe and Dundee. The distance from Ladysmith to Glencoe Junction by rail is about 42 milea. At Giencbe Junction a branch line of the railway runs to Dundee, a distance of about five and a half miles. The main line, which is shown traversing the map, proceeds northward over Laing's Nek into the Transvaal, passing through Newcastle, which is about 37 miles from Glencoe Junction. About two-thirds of the way from Newcastle to Glencoe Junction are Hatting Spruit and Hat. ting, and near Hatting, at Dannhauser (marked in the extreme north of the map), the Boer centre, under General Joubert. was established. The whole of the frontier between Natal and the Orange Free I State (which is to the left of the map) runs alongthe top of the Drakensberg hills. The numerous passes crossing the range have been for some time in the possession of the Free State Boers. The greater part of the frontier line between Natal and tbe Transvaal runs along the Buffalo River. A range of hills called the Biggarsberg range runs straight across from the Drakensbergs to Glencoe, and then takes a more southerly direction towards Rorke's Drift on the Buffalo River. From the Boer centre about Hatting a detachment moved rapidly to the right of the railway, and crossing the Biggarsberg Range came down Elandsiaagte, where it cut the rail- way and the telegraph with a view of destroying the communications between Sir George White and General Symons. Elandslaagte is about 15 miles by rail from Ladysnnth. From the Boer right, on the far side of the Buffalo River, an attack was concen- trated on Dundee, and was repulsed by General Symons in the actIon in which he was fatally wounded. In the meantime the Free State Boers were threaten- ing an attack upon Ladysmith, and had at one time advanced with their right on Besters Station, a station on the railway from Ladysmith to Harrismith (and to west or left of the territory covered by our little map), and their left on Acton, Homes, which lies to the south-west of Besters, near the Tugela River. But they retired, and General French, under the supervision of Sir George White. engaged the Boer forces at Elandslaagte, and utterly routed them. General Yule, who had succeedecl General Symons in command of the Glencoe detach- ment, had to expect the probable advance of tho main column of the Boer forces under General Joubert. He fell back to Waschbank, aoout- xteen miles to the south of Glencoe, where the Boers had in the meantime suc- ] ceeded in blowing up the railway bridge. Sir George Al hite advanced from Ladysmith along the road to Glencoe, and having encountered and defeated a detachment of Boers on the way. joined hands with General Yule, who then marched his force into the strong British camp at Ladysmith, there to await further eventualities. The camp was menaced by Free State Boers to the westward, and from the north by Joubert's main force. Tht. country between Laciysmith and the Tintwa, on the Orange Free State Border, is flat till it reaches the foot hills of the mountain range; and there is little cover on the veldt, the scrub being of the scan- tiest. Our map gives an idea of the mountainous and broken character of the country away to the north and east of Ladysmith. Job's Kop. by Sun- day's River, just south-east of Elandsiaagte, is 5694ft. high, and Mount Indumeni, in the Biggars- berg range, overlooking Wessel's Nek, and the rail- way at Waschbank, is 7200ft. high. Glencoe Hill, up which the British force made its grand charge in (I the first battle, rises steeply 1000ft.

MOORISH INDUSTRIES AT GLASGOW. The arrangements for the representation of Fes industries at the Glasgow Exhibition of 1901 are almost completed. The Sultan, it is understood, will finance the undertaking to the amount of 30,000 dollars. Six of the merchants of Fez have been appointed to superintend the arrangements, Mid they will accompany the deputation, their expenses being paid for them 22,000 dollars of the total sum advanced will be spent on the purchase of th» exhibits, &c., while the remaining 8,000 are to defray the cost of installation in a building which is to be ilL a Moorish style of architecture. The builders, tile cutters, and others arc said to have already left Fez. It is probable that the towns of Rahat and Tetuaa will likewise be represented at this exhibition.

A GRKAT COMPORT."—Yes, it is often misery for a person to cough and cough until it distress both bimself and friends almost beyond endurance, but HEATING'S COUGH LOZENGES would stop all fhat; they are simply unrivalled one akme affords relief. Sold everywhere in tins lSyd- each. THE Duke of York is described as having been "ft free-spoken, happy-hearted, gallant lad, full of the liveliest interest in everything that was going on, and bent on learning as much as he could from his travels." He was fond of practical jokes, and was very popular with his shipmates, as he had no special indulgence, and had to do his full share of work, and gave himself no airs. He won more than one prize for boat-sailing, and, during the time he was in the Britannia, under Mr. Lawless, his tutor, he studied science, the history of the British Navy, as well as modern languages. THE French statistician, Dr. Livrier, says that half of all human beings die before 17, that only one person in 10,000 lives to be 100 years old, and that only one person out of every 1000 lives to be 60. How would you like it if you came home and gave your wages to your wife and ahe went ext end lost them?," asked a man of a Glasgow Sheriff. The n Sheriff replied not. He was a WwbW".

[AIL RIGHTS RESERVED.] JALEBERD'S BUMPS. A PHRENOLOGICAL EXPERIMENT. BY JAMES GREENWOOD. AUTHOR OF Dick Temple," "Reuben Davidger," Wild Sports of the World" Curiosities of Savage Life," "Fair Phyllis of Lavender Wharf" "Under a Cloud," A Little Ragarnltfill," II Kerrison's Crime, Three liogues," "Humphrey Ðyot," "Silas the Conjuror," etc. CHAPTER V. IH WHICH, OWING TO A FOHTUNATK MSCOVKITY OF THE DOCTOR'S NOTB nGOlr, MY VIEWS OF THE SITUATION ARB ALTERED. DOCTOR FLIGHT was standing at a writing-table. with his coat and hat on, writing in a little square book as though something bad occurred to him as being worth making a note of, and he was afraid he might forget it if he left it until he returned. 1 recognised the book at once. It was the same that he usually carried in the breastrpocket of his dressing-gown—the one that was on the table that first night when I was narrating to him what he called my "favourite wickednesses," and in which he from time to time made brief entries. I still kept my eye at a crevice between the folds of the shutters, and presently saw him close the note- book and place it in the writing-table drawer without locking the latter. Then he put on his gloves and went out of the library. I knew that he was going out, and probably would not return until dinner-time, for I heard him tell the housekeeper so. Here then was an opportunity not to be missed. Why should I not, before I took my departure, find: Out what the doctor's mysterious movements meant ? He had never failed to produce the book, and to lay it handy at his elbow with a pencil, whenever we got into conversation and I had no doubt that the key to the secret" was to be found within ita covers. Anyhow, an investigation of the book's contents Would be useful in assisting me to decide whether I should be off at once, or if it would be safe for me to ttay on a little longer. With the French windows fastened on the inside merely with a catch, and me with a clasp-knife, it was Of course easy enough to secure the little book and carrying it to a snug little arbour, I filled another pipe and sat down to read it. I had received some education as a youngster, besides what I had picked up in prison schools, and could read writing pretty well, and the doctor's was a neat hand. Of course, it couldn't be expected that I should be able to make out all the medical language in which the notes were written, but I had not akimmed through more than half-a-dozen pages before I laid down the book and had a good laugh. I took it up again and read on to the end of the writing, including what I had seen him jotting down only a few minutes before. There seemed only one conclusion to arrive at. "He is cracked," says I, "there cannot be the least doubt in the world of that!" The book itself seemed to show enough to prove it, but now I came to put this and that together there was other evidence that such was the case. There was the queer twinkle in the eyes of the gentleman at the wholesale chemist's and druggist's in Holborn when the doctor appealed to him for a character. There were the knowing winks the barber had tipped me when he was advising me to keep a still tongue in my head. And then again there was the doctor's own strange behaviour—the mad kind of lighting up of his face and eyes, and his being on the point of embracing me for very joy when I told him about those peculiar pains in my head. It was puzzling at the time, but the book made it all clear enough. The doctor's craze was phrenology He Was not satisfied with accepting it as a fact, that a person's virtues and vices were all signified by so many bumps and depressions on the cranium, and which were his natural heritage and remained so unalterably. He had invented a wonderftil con- trivance, by means of which the worst type of head might be remodelled, and the greatest rascal that ever existed changed to a respectable member of society. Of course there no were bounds to the social revolu- tion this splendid discovery would effect. To say nothing of the incalculable moral advantage it would insure, be reckoned that it would be a saving of at least three millions a-year to the State, by its making possible the absolute abolition of prisons, peniten- tiaries, madhouses, and perhaps workhouses as well, it being fair to assume that at least three-fourths of the pauperism of the country was attributable to vice erikdicable by his process. It was an exceedingly simple one. The marvellous results mentioned were to be attained by an applica- tion to the bumps" of a combination of certain potent chemicals. These would dissolve and dissipate the vicious secretions of which the objectionable boney bumps were composed, and in course of time cause the rockiest head to' become beautiful as the plains of heaven, the morals of the owner amending correspondingly. I discovered at the commencement of the doctor's notes that he had carefully set down all the chief J instances I had related tobllrt of the wickednesses I took most delight in, and it seemed, though, knowing nothing about phrenology myself, I, of oeurse, was unaware of it, that in the operations lie had already performed on mebé had paid particu- lar attention to those bumps that most required toning down. So confident was he of the efficacy of his system and so impatient for results, that he looked for them as soon as theeeoond morning. Under that date he wrote: "I may be mistaken, but I fancy I already detest a difference in the manner and general demeanour of my patient. There is more placidity of expression in his eyes, which at first were always restlessly roving from this to that, and clearly denoting what he longed to lay hands on according to his old habit,. I have no doubt that his one natural idea when I induced him to come here was to rob me and decamp. I expected no other, and was not surprised to see him furtively examining the table spoons at dinner to assure him- self that they were really silver. Thai was yesterdayl To-day the keen edge of his intuitive dishonesty seemed to be already blunted. Acquisitiveness did hot strikingly.pmnifest itself when I purposely laid my gold phronpmeter on the side-board and left it there as though I had forgotten it. Heglanced towards it once or twice and that was all." And the next day. Joy Can I any longer doubt the reality of my great discovery ? For three days only has my patient been subjected to its influence, and he is already a changed man. He a most confirmed and inveterate rascal, in whom, young as he is, almost evry form of vice and iniquity was so deeply rooted. He complains of 4 strange sensations,'of inexplicable prickings and which point to one conclusion only— triumph and glory for me! But I must learn to re- strain myself. Had Bird been less of a dolt, my emo- tion this morning would have betrayed me to him." I read on. Bird is more crafty and cunning than I at first imagined. He is so completely lacking in all that re- lates to conscientiousness, that if he obtained the least inkling of the true state of affairs, he would not, I feel assured, scruple to tell me any number of lies to give me false encouragement, so that he might re- main in his present comfortable quarters as long as possible. I caught him last night, while my k, was turned, pouring part of his grog oat of the glass into the coal vase. Why was this ? Does he suspect ? But it does not matter. So that he does not spare my tobacco he will sleep soundly enough." .1 I open my eyes at this, and couldn't help grinning as well. So it was I who was crafty and cunning!' Good, that, from a man who had been hocussing a fellow's very pipe! No wonder he could afford to keep his word that my food and drink" should not be tampered with I had plenty of time, and I read the note-book all through again, but discovered in it no passage that interested mo so much as that which furnished the useful hint, that, by giving him false encourage- ment, I might remain in my present" comfortable quarters," as he rightly called them, for a long time yet to come. I no longer entertained the idea of immediately de- camping with all I could conveniently lay hands on. It would pay much better to remain where I was. Now that I knew all about it I need feel no alarm at the doctor's midnight visits to me in my bedroom, or even at the clever contrivance be resorted to for de- Sriving me of consciousness before he unlocked the oor to gain, admittance. At all events, all the unpleasantnesses put together were more than compensated for by the increased ad- vantage I might make my own now that I was possessed of the key of the position. I put back the note-book carefully where I had found it, and went out for a walk that I might COD* sider and arrange my future plans. 4,. CHAPTER VI. I PEEL IT MY DUTy TO GIVE DOCTOR PLIGHT JCt. COURAGJOIBNT. OLD DKBOBAH GIVES HZ A BIT OF HJ118 IIIXD. HATsaine evening—we always sat and had a chat for an hour or so before bedtime—be inquired in quite an offhand way, though I could see he was neryanxious for the answer: > And how is your head. Bird P Has it (juits left off aching?" ot quite, sir. It is better; the throbMng has wased, but I am not free from the other strange sensa- tions I mentioned to you. It is a touch of bilious- ness, very likely," I added, innocently. You see, sir, I am quite unused to the rich sort of living get here." Exactly. You shall have a rhubarb draught, he replied, in an"absent-minded sort of way, and then after a few moments' reflection he remarked, So the throbbing has left you ? But the strange sensations,' as you call it, have not?" It has troubled me off and on all day-just at one spot." And I laid a finger just on the place. I hope," says I, there is not anything forming there." The doctor took my head in his hands. I don't feel anything," said be pleasantly. It must be your fancy." I shouldn't be surprised if it was," said I. puffing at my pipe in a perplexed sort of way. If I nave queer new fancier of one sort, why not of another ?" He was lighting a cigar while I was speaking, and, keeping a sharp eye on him, I at once detected an alteration in his demeanour. The flame of the match showed his suddenly flushed face, and his hand shook. I don't quite understand what you mean," he remarked, still intent on his cigar, as though to avoid looking me in the face. What queer new fancies are you alluding to ?" Well, perhaps fancies' is not the right word. Impulses would be more correct, but queer, for all that. Ha! ha! I feel almost ashamed to tell you, sir, for you will hardly believe it, and if you do you will laugh at me. I'm turning charitable But the doctor did not laugh. On the contrary, he looked grave and deeply interested. How do you mean, turning charitable ? Do you feel an inclination in that direction ?" "I did, but it passed off, thank goodness. Why, I should be just about ruined. Fancy a poor fellow like I am giving away half-a-crown!' Did you do so ?" he asked, eagerly. Well, I wasn't quite such a fool, but it was a near thing. It happened while I was out for a walk this morning. If the impulse,'as we will call it, had lasted only half-a-dozen seconds longer, the old woman would have had it, there can be no doubt about that." Doctor Flight rose suddenly from the table at which he was sitting, and went to the window as though something in the street had attracted his attention. But I knew exactly what caused him to do it. When he turned towards me again, his just-now flushed face was as white as his shirt front, and he was so agitated he could not hold the cigar steadily bewteen his lips. And who was the old woman ?" he asked, with a lame attempt to appear quite at his ease. She had something to sell, I suppose, and you nearly gave her a half-a-crown in mistake when dealing with her?" Worse than that!" I replied, laughing. As I need hardly say, I had the story all ready cut and dried for him. I was actually going to give away the inoney out of pity The doctor raised his eyebrows, and nodded for me to proceed with the story. Yes. I was taking a stroll through the park this morning, and I saw an old woman sitting near the Serpentine, nursing in her lap a starved-looking flower-plant in a little flower-pot. I should hardly have thought, Granny,' says I, 'that you were likely to find a customer for your flower in a place like this.' But she flushed up in a moment at that. Sell it. she says I haven't brought it out to sell. It belongs to my poor little grandson, who is bed- ridden with a bad hip. I bought him this geranium to stand by his cot, thinking it might cheer him up a bit. And so it did, but our dark little back room doesn't agree with it, you see. And seeing it pining and hanging its leaves, my poor little fellow has taken it so sorrowfully to heart that he seems like to die too. So these last few mornings I have brought it out here into the park, hoping that the fresh air and the sunshine may liven it up a bit." "God bless my heart!" exclaimed the kind-hearted doctor. Poor soul, poor soul 1 I wish I had been there; was she very old?" Old enough to know better, sir. The idea of mak- ing such a fuss about a paltry little geranium She actually cried over it. She was cracked no doubt. Don't you think so, sir?" You did not think so, evidently, while you were talking with her," he replied sharply. Why do you think so now?" "That's what 1 can't make out. You are right, sir. I beiieved it then. Blest if I couldn't have snivelled with her! I wouldn't have believed it of myself. And so you gave her your half-crown ?" No, I didn't," says I with a laugh. Not likely. At least at the time it was likely.: I felt Ja sort of swelling in my throat, and my hand went in search of my pocket just as though it had power to do as it pleased and I had no control over it. What an awful sort of thing, doctor, it would be to be seized with a complaint that took that form and there was no cure for it!" It would all depend on there being always money in the pocket the hand went in search of. In your case you repented in time, eh ?" Ii 'I suddenly pulled myself together, sir. Why, what has her sick little grandson lying in the dark back room to do with you, I said to myself, that you should throw away a half-crown on him? If you want to indulge in that kind of tomfoolery, wait till you have got money to spare. So I wished her luck with the old geranium and left her." Doctor Flight looked disgusted. I am sorry to hear you say it, he remarked you should have yielded to your first impulse." What! and wasted two-and-sixpence ?" "It would not have been wasted. Very, very far from it. Had you given it her, I would have returned you ten shillings for your half-crown with much pleasure." I wasn't aware of that," says I simply. I will bear in mind what you have told me, sir, and do better another time." The doctor couldn't resist laughing at that. I am not blaming you," he remarked. if you had given the old woman the money, it would have been better for her, and for me, and for you. We must be patient. It will come all right in time." What will come right, sir? My growing so silly that I shall give away money in that way ? Not while I am of my present way of thinking." Probably not," returned the doctor, quietly. But the time may come when you will not regard it as silly. But I need not say any more about it—except this. If while you remain with me yoo should feel a sudden, impulse to act in a way that is as you think right, don't check the inclination. Give it full play, and let me know the result. It will provide us with something to talk about when we have our usual chat after supper." That night he gave my bald sconce an extra dress ing. I was again shamming insensible, but when it came to his drying the yellow stuff in with the little disc of metal heated at the gas, he made it so hot and held it to the place so long, I was like to have cried out with the pain of it. I began now to take a calmer view of the position. It was plain that I had only to play my cards judiciously and I might make a good thing of it. The main thing to avoid was over-doing it. That the doctor was fairly crazed with his phrenological fad was likely enough, but he was a thoroughly ehrewd and sensible man otherwise, and not easily 'cheated. The worst of it was that, as I gleaned from the note-book, he gave me credit for at least as much cunning as I possessed, and was constantly on his guard against it. The only thing in my favour was that he thought me capable of duplicity of only a Very shallow sort. With my bumps for his guidance he had but a poor opinion of my intellectual faculties as a whole, and deemed himself quite equal to check- mating any attempt I might make to impose on him. It would, therefore, be to my interest to encourage him in that opinion while I manoeuvred with him on quite another tack. I had only one aim in view. He, had plenty of money, and he must be made to pay for making me the subject of his secret experiments which I, of course, knew to be all bosh. One thing I resolved on, and that was to abandon the precautions I had taken against his depriving m« of sensibility while he operated on me. There was not any danger worth speaking of in that preliminary process. I might safely rely on that. His perfect belief in the ultimate success of what his heart was set on, made my life as precious to him as his own. I ran no risk in allowing him to carry on his experi- ment in his own cranky way, while, by continuing to thwart him by slyly putting aside from my nostrils the saturated sponge, was pretty sure to end in the discovery of the fraud, and, most probably, in my im- mediate dismissal. So I no longer troubled myself about that branch of the performance. I took my glass of grog-more than one-after supper, and smoked the tobacco, although I had no doubt that it was drugged so as to produce drowsiness—-andthen I went to bed, kno*- what would happen, but making no effort to keeping awake. Indeed, I found that after smoking more than a couple of pipes of the doctor's tobacco, it would have been no easy matter had I attempted it. No life could have been easier. Plenty to eat and drink, nothing to do but amuse myself, and never without a few shillings in my pocket. And the most comical part of it was, as I often reflected when I ■was taking a stroll in the park or elsewhere to pass the hours between meal times, so far from it all being in any way my deserving, it trardue entirely to jajjy way 11 11 being A sort of curiousity of iniquity ineuvoibt% w cept for a Miracle that only one man in the wcrld was able to work on me The chief drawback to it was that it was a rather lonesome life. I had nobody to talk with but-the doctor, and that only.for an hour or so before bed-time, and, as I need not say, for choice I would have selected more lively company. There was no one else in the house bat Deborah, the housekeeper, and she had hardly a civil word for me. She was not an old woman, not more than forty probably, and being, especially when well-dressed, as I then was, not a bad-looking young chap, I had hopes at first of making myself agreeable to her. But Deborah did not take to me. Of bourse, she did not know anything about what was going on between me and the doctor, but being an old and trusted servant that alone was enough to make her my enemy. Unless I am mistaken she was not with- out her suspicions that her master was not quite right in his head, and I think it not unlikely that she had an idea that I was practising on him instead of him on me. She was watchful of me as a warder. Once she came into the room and caught me withont my wig. 11 You mustn't suppose, Mrs. Deborah," says I, pleasantly, that because I am obliged to have my head shaved I am cracked." Po," Oh, dear no, I am not such a fool is to think that," she answered, with a grim shake of her head it isn't you that's cracked. Far from it." "You are complimentary. If it isn't me, who is it? Not yourself. I will undertake to answer for that much." "I am glad you are aware of it," said Deborah, fixing me with her black eyes. I have got all my senses about me, you may rely on it. And I mean to keep a close watch on you as long as you remain in this house, so I tell you plain." As I need not say, I was rather taken aback. I was never good at keeping my countenance when suddenly tackled. You are an impudent old woman," I blustered. What would Doctor Flight say if I should acquaint him with your rudeness ? How dare you; ma'am ? What do you mean?" But Mrs. Deborah was not of the sort that is easily put down. What do I mean?" she replied, dauntlessly. Look in the glass! Why, your very lips are as white as paper. You hain't the first one that has cheated and imposed on my poor master, but I believe you are the very worst of the lot, and so I don't mince matters with you. But you won't be allowed to have it all your own way; mind that!" "I shall certainly acquaint Doctor Flight with your outrageous conduct." "Do so if you dare," returned Mrs. Deborah, snapping her finger and thumb defiantly, and then you shall see what I will do I know more than you think, maybe." Of course I was glad in one respect that I bad pro- voked the old woman to speak her mind. As I have before remarked, I was aware that she disliked and suspected me, and it was quite as well to know the extent of her animosity. As for her vaunt of what she knew," that probably was mere nonsense. But she was quite right when she said I did not dare tell the doctor. But I was on my guard, and had as little to say to her as possible, and the irksomeness of having no one of my own class to talk to increased. To be sure, had I felt so disposed, I might, with my abundance of leisure, have sought the society of some of i my old companions, but I did not care to mix with them just at present. Not that I was too proud. Nothing would nave given me greater pleasure than to have gone among them for a few hours and stood treat, and related to them all the amazing adventures that had happened to me since my l*st discharge from prison. But I was afraid to risk it. I knew beforehand the advice they would give me if I let out that my master was well off and had plenty of plate and other valuables in the house. Beside*, another scheme had got into my head. And, I may reveal this much in advance, that if, by ram- ming my head against a brick wall I might, by chance, have knocked my precions scheme out again, I oould not have done a better thing. (To be continued)

ABUUr ROYALTY. There some interesting gossip in tho November Woman at Home about various Royalties in this country and on the Continent. Very few people are aware, however, that the Princess of Wales is an omnivorous reader. She is fond of novels in their place, but she enjoys'more truly the perusal 'of some serious book, as her secretary 'and librarian would tell you. But her chief love, as everybody now may know, is for music. Wagner is her musical idol, and she positively delights in his operas. And the Princess herself may fairly be called an executant of no mean order. Further we are told that the Duchess of Albany is herself a great educationist. When a young girl at home, her parents gave her a position of trust in connection with the elementary education in her father's Duchy of Waldeclv-Pyrmont, and after her marriage she devoted much time to scientific and advanced studies under the guidance of the scholarly Prince Leopold. She is a woman of exceptional information and ability, and this has been a little lost sight of in the midst of the Duchess's more prominent phil- anthropic interests. She has set herself resolutely to the important task of making her son a wise and just ruler, and there can be little doubt that her efforts will be crowned with success.

A PREACHER'S DEFINITION OF; A GOOD WIFE. > 1. Discoursing in tho Church Gazette on the Bishop of London's presidency over a woman's meeting, "Dr. Primrose" says: Here is the definition of a good wife given once upon a time by a preacher First, she should be like a snail, always- keep within her own house but she should not be like a snail, and carry all she has upon her back. Secondly, she should be like an echo, to speak when stye is spoken -to; but she should not be like an echo, to have the last word. Thirdly, she should be like a town clock, always keep time and regularity; but she should not be like a town clock, to speak so loud that all the town may hear her.

NAPOLEON'S BOOTS. The boots in questian belong to history., At the present time, however, they belong to a Strasburg antiquary, who has paid 25 marks for them. They were made by an Alsatian bootmaker named Moll, who had been paid 1000 francs for them, and. the Emperor wore them on the day of his coronation. They came into the possession of the painter, David, who utilised them for his coronation picture. Finally, they were returned to the shoemaker, who returned to his native village. After his death they became the property of the commune, and were ex- hibited in tne town hall. When put up for sale recently they realised the ridiculously low price of 25 marks. ( =

IT is interesting to note that one effect ot the Home Office Order permitting prisoners sentenced to fine or imprisonment" to pay as much of the fine as they can and work out the balance in gaol has 1\ been to fix a regular tariff for imprisonment. The magistrates found it unfair that a man sentenced to 10s. or seven days who paid 5s. should be kept in de- tention for four days, and so they now make the scale of fines half-a-guinea or a week, a guinea or a fortnight, and two guineas or a month. This, it will I be observed, works out at ls. 6d. a day as the price of freedom from imprisonment. Miss AGNES WEsTON has done more than any other living woman for making Jack" a better man in the service of his Queen and country. A Devonshire woman, she is proud when her blue-jackets call her mother." It was in the year 1873 that Miss Weston first espoused the cause of the sailor, and her first great undertaking was the outcome of a blue- jacket's wish. In the Tempi* Magazine, an interest- ing account is given of ber splendid work. Jack ashore in the olden time used to be a very diffe- rent man from Jack ashore to-day. The Boyal Sailors' Bests, or Miss Weston's homes. have had a good deal to do with this great change. Here is a picture of one of the Bests. A blaze of electric light, mirrors, marble-topped tables, silver urns, smartly-dressed waitresses, and crowds of bluejackets worth waiting on. It is no uncommon thing for the sailors ashore to con- sume from Saturday to Monday at one of these Bests 1700 sausages, 2000 eggs, 3000 rolls and butter, 5cwt. of fish, 2cwt. of ham, and 100 gallons of tea, coffte, and cocoa, besides tarts, cakes, &c. During the past 25 years over EZOOoo has been entrusted to Miss Weston for her work, and it is her < proud boast that she can accoant for every penny, aad show that it has been laid out to good advan- I tage. Each of the two principal Rests, at Ports- mouth and Devonport, has cost £ 100,000; but the work has grown so fast, through the increasing •ttength of the Navy, that lonsidsiable developments uwaeedt4, especially at Devonoort,

THE MAYDUE SCANDAL. "You are a private detective agency, Mr. Norton ?" Arnold Norton, taken by surprise, for once exhi- bited his thoughts. That is," added Lady Maydue, you undertake, for a fea, to make yourself privately and confidentially useful." The man smiled blandly. It bad startled him at first to discover that old Lady Maydue—maiden mis- tress of Caldwell Manor and Lady Superior of that very select and superior country side-had pierced his defences and guessed his connection with Rally, Norton & Rally, private inquiry agents, of London and it came as a shock to him that the old lady had invited him to the Manor not, as he had fondly as- sumed, to make his persoaal acquaintance and to raise him to the county eminence he hungered after, but to avail herself of his professional acumen. Arnold Norton, during his tenure of the Red House on the breezy hill-brow, had certainly learnt little of the manners and customs of the pleasantly- haughty old maid. Yes," continued her ladyship in answer to a pro- fessional glance from the little man's upressive eyes. There's a skeleton in my family cupboard, but it's well locked in; still, I have a nephew." "Mr. Bruce?" "Bruce Maydue, my poor brother's child. I adopted him when a boy now, as you :must have observed, he is a splendid specimen of manhood; and if I wanted him whea he was a troublesome child and I a strong, capable woman, I want him doubly, trebly, now that he ip the bloom of manhood and I a lonely, decrepit Oh, no compliments; this is purely a business interview, Mr. Norton. I want to keep my nephew and Your nephew wants to marry ?* 5 Not so fast, inygood man. Bruce do in net want to marry-or he didn't this morning. I have him under perfect control so far. There's not a girl in the country he cares a trumped trick for. But there may be this evening. As you are probably aware, The Laurels is let and the family arrives to-day." Mrs. and Miss Riseley." Precisely. The girl is said to be pretty-beauti ful. I knew her as a child, and can even believe the latter. And they will be our neighbours; their grounds rub mine. Of course, I shall not throw crumbs to the pigeon—hardly, my good man. There's been a scandal in the family, you know-brother in the army-cardi —suspicious resignation. Not that that 'ad make any difference to me in the ordinary way, bless you, no. But it's as well to have a handle to your excuse when you mean to raise one, and—we shall not visit. Still, Bruce goes out, and—there you are I" And you wish me, madam- To prevent-positively prevent—my nephew falling in love with Mona Riseley." What ? I wouldn't undertake it I" exclaimed Norton. Lady Maydue shrugged her shoulders. "Yet you are said to be -a cute specimen of your class." The reiteration silently passed the man's lips, and' it bit them in the passing. He had already been more disappointed than he had had opportunity to realise in his discovery that Lady May due's invitation was purely a business one. He had swallowed the obvious tone of superiority and the deprecating mode of address by which her ladyship had conveyed the intimation that but for his professional utility he un- doubtedly would not be sitting in the Manor House and now he was bluntly told that he was a cute speci- men of his class. Of his class! He who had gone; into the country and built himself a mansion in order1 that be might attain a social level denied him in London (where society was too often his client), and had sedulously—and to some losi-woven around him a fabric of independence wherein the webs that linked him to. the agency never strayed. Arnold Norton, gentleman, mentally boiled. I follow you, madam," he said curtly. Your son is to be saved from marriage with Miss Riseley. Very well. I promise you that be shall My dear man," cried her ladyship with an out- burst of gratitude, do this for me, and-. You know my bankers? The cheque is yours when you prove safety. When I am gone my nephew can please himself and marry to his heart's content; but until then I want him. Do as you promise, and you will not find me backward Arnold Norton had risen. Lady Maydue, observing his pale lips and danger-looming eyes, wondered if the man always suffered so when working out his professional problems. Rest en-y, Lady Maydue," said Norton. "Your nephew shall not marry Miss Bisely." And as he left the house and quaffed tlie crisp in- vigorating country air. be added to himself j Fori will marry her myself. IVe met her several fifties, with happy results. Cash shall -inarry blood, and then, Lady Maydue, out of'your cupboard comes the family ghost you fondly imagine is locked upsecurely, unlE-ss-unless you eat dirt for your contemptible pride!" i>r » » -# # #. Mr. Norton determined to develop his plot with- out delay, so he put on a pair of skates and went for a spin along the narrow, wood-banked river that skirted his estate. As chance devised it he came upon Bruce Maydue endeavouring to lower the local amateur record for the skating mile. Bruce was for pMsing, but the other stopped him. 1 "Good morning, Maydue "Brace mentally re- sented the intimacy of address—"Having a spin on the ice ? Splendid exercise. Think the1 frost'11 last ? Not? Pity! The Riseleys are de to-day. Mona- Miss Riseley, that is—is passionately fond of skat- ing." Bruce lifted his eyebrows expressively. Mona, indeed I What cheek the fellow had got! Norton smiled, and determined to plunge. It's a bit of a secret, old man," he said confi- dentially, and I wouldn't tell everybody. But I know I can trust you, Bruce. Fact is, I'm as good as engaged to Miss Riseley. Only the announce- ment is wanting to complete the transaction, and that, for private reasons, is reserved for a space. Now you see why, knowing Mona was coming here to live, I built my nest on yonder hill," Bruce did not reply. He could not. The announce- ment had robbed him of words. "Why. my dear fellow, you look astonished I" laughed Norton. Aren't you going to congratulate me ?" No," snapped Bruce. "Oh! Why not?" "Because it's a- t Because I don't feel called upon to do so." With which lame termination to a threatened ex- plosion Bruce skidded away. The faint wind: chased him with Norton's cry- I say; Don't forget what I've told you is' strictly- confidential." So," added Norton to, hinue If he doubts my yarn. He almost called me a liar. But I am too far down the social ladder to be treated to the lie'direct. Well, I've started ar bold game, and I must play boldly to my own lead." He went home and wrote careful letter to Mrs. Bisely (one of his clients at the time of the son's army disgrace), in which he welcomed her to Cald- well, asserted that he could know no happiness till she and her beautiful oaugbter had honoured him with a call at the Red House, and as a temporary solace, promised himself the felicity of calling at The Laurels in the morning and repeating his welcome in person. By the way" (he added), "I dropped in at the Manor to-day. Lady Maydue was very downcast. She is torriibly afraid that her nephew will get matried and leave her, though I doubt that Bruce will be so misguided, since he has been informed, in no uncertain language, that her ladyship will stop supplies and cut him off with a shilling at the first rumour of matrimony." The following morning he went to The Laurels. A lie drove through the gate he spied a familiar figur6 coming down the avenue from tne house. Bruce Maydue I He has forestalled me—but not my letter, fortunately. Has be made things hot for me, I wonder P" He scanned the youth's few closely as they drew together. Bruce had recognised Norton's turn-out at it entered the gate, and the smile died from his eyes immediately. As he passed th« cart his face wore a most dejected mien, from which Norton augured well for himself. « Not only Mrs. Biseley, but Mona herself, was at the door to welcome Mr. Norton, who greedily ac- quiesced in their desire that be should be shown over The Laurels. And, as if that were not encourage- ment enough for one day, be accepted a pressing invitation to stay to lunch. When he left The Laurels his scheme, he felt, was well assured. He had played boldly, and he had won. What other construction could he place upon the morning's affairs ? Bruce Maydue had been sent away with an ill-becoming hang-dog air, while he, the cute and well-to-do private detective, had been feted beyond experience. Undoubtedly his letter to Mrs. Riseley had hit the mark, and Lady Maydue's skeleton was already hammering at the cupboard door Nor was Norton's experience of that day gainsayed the next, or the next. The Riseleys bad taken a violent fancy to him. The fact was so obvious. For three weeks they either rode or skated with him every morning, lunching promiscuously at the Red House and The Laurels. And only once during that period of joy did Bruce Maydue cross their path; they all cut him dead. It was delightful-to Arnold Norton; and it came about that when, three weeks after the Biseley* Stffivfed at £ aldwsllt Norton found' himself upon toe fiowa rives gliding along betide the most beautiful girl in the county, with Mrs. Riseley far in the rear, and only the over-bending trees to listen, that Norton suddenly said: Mona, I love you Sh!" replied the girl, her cheeks flooding red. Mamma is behind." I can't help it," sighed Norton. I love you, dearest, and I can't keep the fact to myself for a minute longer. Mona, do you love me, too ?" Mona slowed up and glanced down the river. They were alone. She clutched at an overhanging branch white with hoar-frost, and sighed deeply. Mona, dearest, won't you answer me and put me eut of my anxious misery ?" I—I scarcely know how," stammered the blushing girl. Say you love me! That's all I want. Say youH be my wife, and live in the Red House, and be the dearest little spoilt woman that ever had her own way. Say yes,' Mona. Only yes' I—I'm afraid I-I couldn't say that," "Couldn't? Why not? ell me why not, Mona 1 Tell me! You don't love me T You can't say you'll marry me ? Why not ? Oh, why not ?" "Because _;|Her eyes met his for the first time, and he perceived a gleam of triumph in them. Because Miss Riseley is my promised wife." Bruce Maydue had come unexpectedly upon the scene. Arnold Norton saw him, and shrank as from a heavy blow. Mona," continued Bruce, go to your mother, dear, while I inform this-man-that you and I have been engaged for the past year. Yes," he added, drawing nearer to Norton as Mona skated away, I was actually engaged to Miss Riseley when you lied that she was engaged to yon." But what about Lady Maydue ?" sneered Norton with great satire. What about her ladyship?" Ah!" said Bruce, I had forgotten her ladyship. Just come with me, will you ? Perhaps-1 Who knows ?" With which indefinite encouragement Bruce led the way, followed bythe uncertain Norton. At the bend of the stream the former drew tip and, assuming a listening attitude, beckoned the latter to do like- wise. I From the other side of the jutting bank Lady Maydue's voice was audible. I am only half surprised, my dear. If Bruce eould have resisted your sweet face and winning manners he would have been unworthy the came of Maydue. Have I not fallen a victim myself ? I, who vowed vengeance upon the woman who sup- planted me in my nephew's affections. And though I deplore the means adopted to degrade that detec- tive agency, I congratulate you, Mona, dear, upon the result. It. was a beautiful game of bluff, though, equal to his own; but of course it is a secret among ourselves—unless Mr. Arnold still wishes to rake my ancient family skeleton from its cupboard, in which case, my dear, we will-nml-e it public The Maydue scandal is still a secretjthough Norton's degradation leaked out when he left the neighbour- hood.

A PARSON'S WIFE'S ORDEAL. Among the sad instances of parsons' wives I have known (writes Martin West in the Church Gazette) have been those of the unhappy women whose hus- bands have gone wrong, or been, to put it mildly, doubtful. The pains they have taken to cover this up, not only from the parish, but also from family and friends, must have been almost equivalent to a martyrdom. One lady I knew had a husband who had become virtually an Agnostic while she retained her faith. She hoped and believed that larger knowledge would reconvince her husband, and therefore she was naturally reluctant that he should resign his Orders. Doubt. is common (at times) to us all, and I well remember escorting her home once after she had been to call, when she explained the position. I took the same view, and eventually her husband conquered Giant Despair, for his name is stiil in Crockford." But she must have passed through an awful time.

REINDEER FLESH FOR FOOD. It is stated that a strenuous attempt is being made by some enterprising Norwegians to popularise rein- deer flesh as an article of diet in Europe. The ex- periment of raising the animals in large numbers for slaughtering purposes will be fairly tried. They ex- pect to tfind profitable markets in Trance and Bel- gium, and will even endeavour to induce beef-eating Britons to purchase the article.

DETECTIVES ON WHEEL^. Birmingham at the present time is seriously suf- fering from the depredations of a band of midnight robbers. Night after night extensive robberies have been committed, and the ordinary police service has seemed powerless to check it. Matters, however, have now become so grave that a special corps of cycling detectives has been employed to patrol the streets on lampless cycles.

POSTAL COMMUNICATION WITH SOUTH AFRICA. The Postmaster-General can at present only seenre as far as Cape Town the transmission of cor- respondence (including parcels), addressed to persons in the Transvaal (South African Republic) and Orange Free State. The postal authorities of the Cape Colony may or may not be in a position to effect delivery of such correspondence to the addressees, many of whom are no doubt at Cape Town or in other places in communication with Cape Town. Correspondence (including parcels) for Rhodesia and other parts of British South Africa, with which communication has been or may be cut off, is also being forwarded to Cape Town or Durban, for transmission to destination by the first available means.

RUSSIAN NAVAL SCANDAL. The chief persons concerned in the Black Sea naval scandal, first brought to light about two years ago, will be brought to trial shortly at Seba3topol, before a special naval court-martial. Two of the senior officers accused committed suicide shortly after the disoovery of the huge defalcations in the Black Sea Naval Commissariat, and more particularly in the Coal Supply Department, in which the frauds are said to amount to several millions of roubles. There is just now a pretty plentiful crop of huge peculative scandals in Russia. The Credit Association and the Mamontoff scandals at Moscow both rank in popular parlance as Russian Panamas, but public feeling in that country is very slightly agitated by such events. They are, unhappily, only too common, and too characteristic of Russian commercial and financial morality.

SOLDIERS AND THEIR SONGS. It has been asked, why does not the Poet Laureate give us a song at the present time ? There is an opening (suggests a writer in the Daily News) for a good poem for publication, but Tommy Atkins pre- fers to be his own poet. Give him a ringing tune like Strolling Round the Town," and he will put words to it. Not that his officers can't write verse. Major Hobday, R.A., wrote a splendid burlesque, which ran through India from Simla almost to Kurrachee. Colonel Baden-Powell is responsible (a correspondent writes) for I ne'er shall forget her, ■ i That girl of Valetta, The first time I met her I thought she was prim* But I managed to get a Peep through her faldetta, And thought that I'd better Get out while I'd time. The feldetta is the hood and shawl combined worn by Maltese women, and the story goes that the women of Valetta are under a vow to wear it until the expiration of a century from the time their ancestors fell victims to Napoleon's soldiery, a tory Maltese ladies indignantly deny. The Grenadier Guards marched on Khartoum singing "A Little Bit off the Top."

THE END OF A FAMOUS GUNBOAT. News has just been received from Sierra Leone of the sale of the famous gunboat Alecto, the best known of all British war vessels in West African waters. Her service on the coast alone has been longer than the life" of most ships in: her Majesty's Navy. There was hardly a little war in West Africa in which the Alecto did not take part. Being of very shallow draft, she could go up the various rivers with ease and safety. However, she is now obsolete. The vessel, it is stated, has been bought by the Anglo-Beige Company of Sierra Leone, and is to be converted into a trading ship. .),

THE INCREASE OF IRISH LUNACY. The latest report of the Inspectors of Lunatic Asylums in Ireland, though dated July 28. has only now been published. It shows that the total number of insane in establishments on January 1, 1899. was 20,304, as compared with 19,590 in the previous Janunry. This shows an. increase of 691 in the numbers under care in the district asylums, of 23 in I private licensed houses and institutions for the insane, and of nine in workhouses: while the in- mates of the Criminal asylum have decreased by one. A decrease of one is shown in the number of lunatics remaining in prisons awaiting transfer to asylums; and the single Chancery patients "iSO show a decrease of seven. The total incrt-n^e for the year—714—was larger than ttiii, tor ]SS7—G24—and exceeded the average increMS* for the previous 10 years, namely, 444. A table yivmg the number and distribution of all lunatics under I BIRD'S-EYE VIEW OF NOBTH NATA L. I i ",r care on December 31 of each year from 1880 to 1898, shows that in this interval of time an increase of 7322 has taken place in the total numbei the in- mates of district asylums have increased by 6622; the criminal lunatics at Dundrum have decreased by eight; the patients in private asylums and institu- tions have increased by 92; and the pauper lunatics in workhouses by 526. As stated in previous re- ports, these numbers point to the fact that the main increase has been in the population of district asylums. Thus, in 1880, the ratio of the insane in district asylums to the total number under care was G7 per cent., and in workhouses 27 per cent. In 1898 the ratio in asylums had risen to 75 per cent., while in workhouses it has fallen to 20 per cent. So far as any conclusions can be, drawn from the admissions to district asylums, the statistics show that the total admissions have increased by 184 during the year, and that this increase has taken place both in the first admissions and the re-admissions—the increase in the former being 125, and in the latter 59, as compared with the previous year. The increase is, however, to some extent accounted for by the large number of transfers from workhouses, and of these transfers the great majority of those shown on the asylum books as first admissions have been for many years resi- dent in the lunatic wards of the workhouses. Although, as just stated the numbers transferred from workhouses to the asylums during the year have increased, it may be remarked that the numbers re- maining in the former institutions show np corre- sponding diminution. No provision exists in Ireland by which any returns can be obtained of pauper lunatics wandering at large, or residing with rela- tives. except through the decennial census. It is, however, probable that the latter olasses which fur- nish a large proportion of the first admissions to asylums jnd workhouses, are decreasing from year to year. The absolute figures cannot, however, be obtained until after the next census.

TOO BIG A PASSENGER. The Morning Post reports an amusing misadven- ture which has befallen M. de la Porte, the reporter of the Naral Budget. M. de la Porte expressed the wish to make a trip in the submarine torpedo-boat the Gymnote. His desire was, of course, acquiesced in, and the Gymnote was ready to start, when it was discovered that M. de la Porte, who is a very corpu- lent man, eould not be got on board. The hatches which give admission to the Gymnote are exceedingly narrdw, and it was quite impossible for M. de la Porte to pass through them.

A rnxG upon medical advice, Admiral Dewey has ohnndnned his proposed trips to Philadelphia and Atlanta, and will not accept any more invitations. Tlu: annual sale of the Queen's Christmas stpck will be held on Wednesday, December 6, at the Prince Consort's Flemish Farm in Windsor Gfsat Park.

MOSQUITOES AND MALARIA. A Correspondent writes to the Lancet: At the pre- sent time the work of Major Ross has brought the question of the connection between mosquitoes and! malaria so prominently under notice that it is inte- resting to find that long ago the mischief wrought by mosquitoes was suspected by the acute Japanese. In a little Japanese romance written (or translated) by Ji. Morris and published in 1885, the following statement occurs: The Japanese declare that its (the mosquito's) constant attacks bring on a kind of fever and this is by no means improbable, having in view the fact that this pest prepares for the summer campaign by a course of training on the swamps and marshes of the neighbourhood, and inoculates whole families with the essences of these odoriferous hunting-grounds. If sleepless nights com- bined with repeated doses of this subtle poison were not to give rise to feverish symptoms it would, indeed, be strange.