Fair Motorist: "Well, good-bye, dear-no doubt we shall run against you in London this season Jessie: You seem to like hie attentions. Why don't you marry him h" Jennie: Because I like hit; attentiot; Aire. Highflyer: Do you care for can- delabra?" Mrb. Newrich: "Canned alabro? I ain't never et none." Molly: "I don't see why you have decided to marry Jack. You're not in love with him." Polly: No; but another girl is." The man whose troubles don't need nuffin* but good advice," said Uncle Eiben, "will allus .•fen' dat -he has any number o"" friends." ''Here, hold my horse a minute, will you? Sir; I'm a member of Parliament!" "Never mind. You look honest. I'll take a chance. Johnny went to see the stock yards; Mothr missed him in the jam; Johnny fell into the discard, And came heme as potted ham. "You say that your friend was utterly pros- hated by a mere case of mistaken identity P" Yes. He mistook a toadstool for a mush- fOOM." T~ Now Johnny," asked the teacher, what do we see in the country besides grass,^trees and fl«werfi ?" "Patent medicine signs! was the prompt reply. "Do you know that there is money in angora oats p" I know that there is in one. It ate tk vest of mine and there was a JE1 note in one of the pockets." Gueet: "Is the feeding good in this hotelr Hotel Clerk: Good ? I should thing so. Why, 75 per cent. of our guests get gout, and the re- maining 25 dyspepsia." Oyer: Slugem, the ex-prize fighter. is mak- ing money hand over fist." Myer: "So? What's ibis game r" Gyer He's running a prepara- tor school for college boys." Pat: ",nat be ye charge for a funeral notice in yer paper ?" Editor: Half a crown an wch." Pat "Good heavens I An' me poor brother was six feet high." He tried to land on the other man's neck, But the other man had to be shown; The would-be lander was a sorry wreck- He had larded, instead, on his own. The following melancholy conversation be- tween two small boys was recently overheard: "I say, Jimmy, who is that man with your mother r" That ain't a man that's tathei- Minnie: "What frauds these beggars are! I met a blind man who said, 'Please, give me a penny, beautiful lady.' Mamie: Yes, he said that to make you think he really was blind." lie- "And so young Northam is engaged to that plain Miss Addison ?" She: Yes, but Love is blind, you know." He: "Well, I don't know, for he must have seen twice as much in her as l did." "i es, sir, my wife is a most extraprdinary woman When I proposed to her, what do you think she said?" "'This is so sudden,' t-ourse." "No, sir, she said, 'I expected this.' A smart young fellow called out to a farmer who was sowing seed in the field, Well done, old fellow, you sow: I reap the fruits." "May- be you will," said the farmer, "for I'm sowing 'Iu-I'nn_" Bizzer "I regret to learn that your son failed in his graduating examination at the Univer- sity." Buzzer: "Well, he says he could stand that if only his crew had not been beaten in the lJeat race." Waiter (to cook): "Steak for one. Gent don't want it raw, nor he don't want it burned black." Cook (angrily): Is that what he said? Waiter: "No, not exactly. I ask how he wanted it, an' he said 'medium. It has tra-nspired at the War Stores Inquiry that the contractors always found it impossible to cheat the 7th Hussars. It is now rumoured that this regiment is to be renamed the King's Own Sharpshooters. Own Sharpshooters. Mrs. Housekeep: "I think we'll get along. Bridget, if you can only manage not to disobey me." New Servant: Faith, we kin fix that uisy, mum. Let me do as Oi p-l'ase an' don': give me any orders." Patience: ''Do you really think Dauber is a peniusr" Patrice: '"Indeed 1 do! You evi- dently never saw any of his paintings ?" Oh, ves, I did, and that is why I think he is a genius ile sells some of them." Dr. Deepeearcli is a wonderful man." Why what has he done that's wonderful 1"" He has discovered over 50 new diseases." "Can he evii-otheui,illf" Oh, dear no." He leaves that for someone else to do." I hear your master is a perfect lady-killer, James, especially since he got his new auto mobile. Is that so?" "Well, partly, ma'am, tOO to speak. He's run over quite a lot, but none of 'em's dead yet." At last the time came," said the Arctic ex. plorer, v when our sole supply of food consisted or a few canned ox tails and pickled pigs' feet;" "Then," said his hearer, "you were indeed re dnced to extremities." Dad (severely): "And, look here, Ethel, yot; mustn't encourage that young man to stay so lati every night. It's disgraceful. What does youi mother say about it ?" Ethel: She says met haven't altered a bit, dad." Did you ever make a mistake in a diag- nosis ?" Only once. I was called to attend a sick man whom I said had indigestion, ana Jess than a week later I discovered that he wai rich enough for appendicitis!" Husband: Why do you encourag6 that Mrs ,Tattles to keep calling so often? It is becaus< you enjoy hearing the neighbours talked about?" .Wife: Oh, no; but when she is here I know sh. isn't somewhere else talking about me." I suppose you can remember when a lot 01 this land could have been bought for a song." r Yes," answered Farmer Corntossel. Bui after seein' how much my daughter's singin lessons cost that doesn't seem so cheap." Mammy," said Pickaninny Jim, as h. watched the meteors falling, does you see at dat brightness comin' down?" "Yas, indeed.' I know what makes it. De cullud angels hai been put to work sweepin' up de golden city." Bobby: &y, they have some smart detec- fives in our town. They can find out whi robbed a place by thumb marks." Benny: That's nothing. Why, our cook can do thai every time I sneak jam out of the pantry." The man who wins my admiration," said th< serious girl, must be one who can stand firm i. his convictions in the face of ridicule, opposition. and personal danger." H I see," said Misi Cayenne. Your ideal is a football umpire." "My first husband," she sobbed, "was a kind gentle man, always considerate of me. H< always let me have my own way." "Yes," growled the second, and look at the result." "1",esult? What result?" "Why, he's dead." Motorist: Two pounds for that thing ?* Biddy: Shure, she was the apple of me eye, anc laid two eggs a day. She was the constant.play. riiate of me only daughter, and wok us up regu- lar every morning. She was a rale pedigre4 burrd." "There is no place like home," said the mat bf gentle sentiments. Yes," answered7 Mr. Cuinrox. But when you've got two countrj houses, a residence in the city, and are paying board at three summer resorts, how are you go ing to know where it is?" No, I can't subscribe. I don't believe in sending out foreign missionaries. There is quite sufficient distress in our own country." But it is our duty. to feed the hungry." "Then surely you can feed them on something cheaper than missionaries." Judge," said Mrs. Starvem to the magifr trate who had recently come to board with her, tr I'm particularly anxious to have you try this chicken soup." I have tried it," replied the magistrate, and my decision is that thE chicken has proved an alibi." Scadsby showed a good deal of promise when he was a young chap," remarked the man who was revisiting the town of his youth. How did he come out ? Never amounted to any- thing," "aid Old Resident, after he was elected the most popular man in the town! Sarah, a coloured woman, was busily employed about our small northern kitchen when I had occasion to go out there, and by way of being pleasant, said, You are from-the south, are you not, Sai-a It Law, yes, miss 1" was the an- twer. Born in the south?" I continued. Ori- ginlly bawn in Richmond, miss," was the as. conisking reply. -Jtanima: "Now, Johnnie, how did your jacket torn ?" Johnnie: It was Tommv Brown ma that." Mamma: "Oh, what a stupid bo* you were to let Tommy tear your jacket." tonnnie: j couldn't he4p it. mamma. You Was sitting on him and holding him down 0) the ears, and]: couldn't hold his hands too, sould I, mamma?" Major Buffer: "Lady Vi looks uncommonly vell. Got such a fresh complexion-" Mrs. Scr at chain Yes. Fresh one every day!" Reform our spelling. Cut out the silent tetters. Then cut out the ones that make a aoise. After that we can bavesid)ne peace- Mike: "Be jabbers, ye are after using a iot tf matches to light yer pipe wid. Sure, wan *.<& £ of matches a we«&-lasts me a fortnight!"
INTERESTING FACTS. An Arab drinks nine or ten cups of coffee trei-y day. It is & peculiar thing that string games are popular all over the world amongst the coloured races. In Persia the dough for making bread is rolled out as thin as a pancake, and as long as an ordi- nary towel. Snakes are so short-sighted that they are un- able to see a distance of more than one quarter their own length. Silk as fine as any from a oocoon is spun by the Prima nobilis, a shellfish found in the Mediterranean Sea. Persons bitten by the bird of death of New Guinea are seized by maddening pains, which rapidly "extend to every part of the body. Lose of sight, convulsions, and lockjaw are the other symptoms which follow in rapid succession. Perhaps the smallest post office in Scotland is that of Berriedale, Caithness. The post office proper is so small that it only gives room for the operator and the machine. Notwithstanding its smallness, it is one of the most important in the North, as it is the receiving and dispatching office for all the telegraphic communications of his Grace the Duke of Portland, whose famous Langwell mansion is only 200 yards away. Another small post office is Hartwood, which is only capable of accommodating two persons.
--+- MORE IMPORTANT. ç, Young man," said the farmer, "I must bay you've done a heap o' talking about your family tree. Anybody would think you owned a whole timber-yard. Come out into the lane a minute." The youth in golf clothes accompanied him. Pausing by a weeping willow, the farmer said: I want you to take particular notice of this." What for?" That's our family tree. Thtt's what has heightened our ideals and stimmylated our energies. That has furnished switches fur four or five generations of us."
INTOXICATED WASPS. Wasps have a great fondness for over-ripe fruit, especially pears, plums, and sweet apples. The sugar of these fruits has a tendency to pass into a kind of alcohol in the ordinary process of rotting, and after imbibing large quantities of this liquid the wasps become outrageously in- toxicated. They crawl away in the grass in a semi-somnolent condition, and remain till the effects have passed off, when they will go at it again. It is while in this condition that they Jo their worst stinging. A person receiving a sting from tine of these intoxicated wasps will suffer severely from nerve poison for days.
0 HE WAS NOT FIT TO EAT. Not long ago a missionary fell among cannibals, who. after holding a conference, de- cided to cook him for supper. They communi- cated their intention te the unfortunate man, who, however, strongly advised them not to devour him, saying he was very unpalatable. See," said he, I will give you a piece of my leg to eat, and you will no longer wish to eat me." With these words he produced a knife, cut a slice from his leg, and sent it the round of the cannibals. The unanimous decision after tasting it was to let him go free. The leg was made of cork!
A SURGICAL ANT. It is said that the native Brazilian, far re- moved, as lie usually is. from doctors and sur- geons. depends upon a little ant to sew up his wounds when he is slashed or scratched. This odd creature is called the surgical ant, from the use to which it is put. The ant has two strong nippprs on its head. They are its weapons for battle or forage. When a Brazilian has cut himself, for example, lie picks up an ant, presses the nippers against the wound, one on each sida. and then give the insect a squeeze. The indignant anl- snaps its nippers together, piercing the flesh, and bringing the lacerated parts close together. The Brazilian at that moment gives the ant'« body a jerk, and away it fl OS, leaving the nippers embodded in the flesh. Of course, this kills the ant, but it has served its most useful purpose in life. The operation is repeated with other ants until tlls wound is sewed up neatly and thoroughly.
-+-- SERIOUS CONFUSION. t: It 's a great help to be able to size up the ni" ti you come in contact with," said a business man to his son: "but it is more important still that- you should first know yourself. For instance, a noisy lot tacked out of their club late one night and up the street. They stopped in front of an imposing residence. After considerable discussion, one of them advanced and pounded on the door. A woman stuck her head out of a second-storey window and de- manded, none too sweetly, Wifat do you wantr" Is this the residence of Mr. Shmithr" in quired the man on the steps with an elabcrait bow. It is. What do you want?" Ish it possible that I have the honour e, slipeaking to Misslius Slinlitli, Yes. What do you want?" Good. Misslius Slimitli, will vOll-hie-com. down an' pick out Mr. ShmithP The rest of utf want to go home!"
♦ MARRIAGE BY PROXY. Marriage by proxy, or, as it is called, mar- riage by the glove," is common in Holland, and is caused by the fact that many of the eligible young men after having finished their education in the schools of the Fatherland, depart fof Dutch India to engage in some lucrative com- mercial enterprise or to accept a position in the Colonial service. The scarcity of marriageable white women in that country induces the would- be husband to write to a friend in Holland, enclosing his wish for a wife. The friend selects willing young lady, generally with a sub- stantial dot. and otherwise conforming closely to the specifications of the letter. A photograph of the tit-cured one is enclosed in the return epistle. After the lapse of a few months, a soiled left-hand glove, with a power of attorney, is received from the far-away bachelor. The friend in Holland marries the selected bride in precisely the same manner as if he were the actual groom, and the young wife departs in the next India llItil steamer to bring happiness to the lonely one in the far East. A marriage of this description is as" binding as if the bride- groom were present, and is never repudiated. If either party to the glove marriage should die before meeting in India, the survivor would share the property of. the deceased in accordance with the laws.
A PINCH OF SALT. There is a metal called sodium which looks like little silvery globes, and is a. sort of cousin to gold and silver. If these little globes in their way over the world meet and are breathed upon by a yellowish-green vapour called chlorine, they vanish in an instant: and in place of the two, sodium and chlorine, there is a grain of salt. It is a happy thing in nature that these do "jome together very often, otherwise we should have no salt, and salt is necessary.for ell. sorts of life. It is found almost everywhere. It is in the oceans; there are also salt lakes and salt mountains and salt fields. Spain has a great mountain of salt: and Poland has some wonder- ful mines, where you are let down a-pit, and pome to workshops where hundreds of men are hewing out blocks of pure white salt, which shine and sparkle in the lamplight like diamonds. In America there is a famous salt lake. So It springs are very common. The sea wafer is pumped into broad, flat pans and left out in the sun to be dried up. Whrn it is dried up the salt is left in a crust on the bottom of the pans. There are also great salt works in Eng- land. If water gives us salt, so also does fire. After an eruwti.on the cracks and crevices rf Mount Vesuvius are often covered with a thick roat of salt. Huge blocks of it were once found very near its burning mouth. The people of Iceland, too, often carry whole wagon (o;uls of salt from their burning Mount Heda. There are plants, likewise, which can yield a small supply. By the seashore grows a grey, prickly, homely plant called saltwort. Our soda mostly comes from the ashes of this very plant. Do you know the curious and pretty ice plant? It sometimes grows in gardens, oftener in greeohouses. This is a great treasure to the people of Canary Islands, who raise it in large fields, pull it up, burn it, and drive a good trade with the soda which they get from the ashes, i What stores of useful things are to be found: in Nature. Animals which live on vegetation; "specially delight in salt. Wild beasts on the plains, the deer, as well as cattle in our bajn- yards, are fond of it. Indeed, life would perisfc without salt.
SCIENCE NOTES. I Addressing the French Aeademy of Sciences. f. Dastre, the eminent Professor of Physiology it the Sorbonne, described a new process for the sterilisation of milk by exposing the milk to th lltra-violet rays of a mercury-vapour lamp. A funnel should be used, and the milk slowly soured on its interior surface, which is iUn- iiined by the rays, as the action is limited to a small radius. The chemical composition of the nilk is not affected. Celluloid preparation by a recently patented method uses naphthaline in the place of cam- phor, so obtaining a cheaper and less inflam- mable material. The new mixture is made from 100 parts of nitrocellulose, 60 parts of alcohol, 30 parts of acetone, and 10 parts of naphthaline. To increase its flexibility, castor oil is also added. The unpleasant naphthaline odour disappears when the naphthaline cellu- loid is kept a long time in the air. A quick tanning mixture for producing a trong and soft leather for boots, shoes, saddles, belts, and other military equipment, and alsc especially for driving-belts is made as indicated below. Inferior hides, such as buffalo. may bf used. The hides receive the usual preliminary treatment, such as treatment with salt, lime, pigeon's dung, or acetic acid, and are then im, mersed for from eight to forty hours in a mix. IIIlre of approximately the following composition: Water 100 parts, ferrous sulphate 11.25 parts, potassium nitrate 4 parts, and potassium bi- chromate 1.25 parts. Acetic acid may be added to produce very soft leathers.
--+- TRAINED FLIES. ™ In a lecture delivered some time ago, Mr. F. P. Smith described some remarkable feats per- formed by flies, and some curious facts relative to a fly's intelligence. Flies placed in a glass case, after flying against the glass sides of the lase. appear to learn that they really cannot get away. Some flies trained by Mr. Smith will not fly away if the opportunity be afforded them, and even wild flies have been taught to give up their freedom. Mr. Smith has trained flies to revolve wheels, roll balls and dumb-bells, and <s of the opinion that the fly does not realise what it is doing, but that it is under the impres- sion that it is walking along a continuous sur- --+- « face. I
THE BIGH-TENSTON LINE AND HAIL- STORMS. The French Academy of Science is somewhat I nuzzled over the question of the influence pxerted by a high-tension line on hailstorms. In k recent paper presented before, the Academy the instance was cited of a chain of mountains which apparently attracted hailstorms, owing to the location of numerous valleys that diverted the storms along the line of the chain. Recently. a three-phase 45,000-volt line was built in this ricinity, and since then hailstorms have crossed the valleys and followed the high-tension line. Very evidently the transmission line exerted an nfluence on the storms, but the exact nature of this influence is difficult to explain.
IMITATIONS OF SILK. IMITATIONS OF SILK. Artificial silk is very deficient in strength, ri^iecially when wet, but strong threads and fabrics which have the gloss of liilk, and are not affected by water can be made by subject* Iii,, cotton to various treatments. The oldest process, mercerising or stretching the fibres itt a bath of caustic alkali, produces an inferior gloss. In newer methods, the cotton fibres are practically covered with a coating of artificial silk, either by dipping them into solutions of cellulose similar to those from which artificial cellulose similar to those from which artificial silk is made, or by treating them with solvents of cellulose, and thus forming the silky coating out of the fibres themselves. The iiliitations of II silk produced by these methods are very glossy, and very strong and durable, for exposure to moisture weakens only the coating and not tlw body of the fibre. »
SEGREGATION IN MILD-STEEL PLATES. C. L. Huston in the journal of the Franklis Institute shows, by means of a large number oi tensile strength and carbon determinations on test pieces from different parte of the eamo ingots, that a large amount of segregation occUrI in mild-steel plates. The carbon is always highest at the centre of the top of the ingot; next to this, the zone of gas-bubblao, which ex-4 tends all round the ingot, roughly parallel to, and some distance from, the surfaces of the ingot, is richest in carbon, the percentage falling Dff considerably towards the outside, and slightly towards the centre of the ingot. Thus in out case the carbon varied from 0.6 per cent. at the centre of the top to 0.15 per cent. at the edge of the top, 0.28 per cent. at the centre of the ingot, 0.23 per cent. at the edges of the bottom. and 0.30 to ,0,51 per cent. at the zone of gas bubbles. Since the tensile strength varies with the percentage of carbon present, Mr. Huston believes that the most satisfactory procedurt would be, in specifications, to leave a wide margin as to tensile strength. In his opinion, a lower tensile strength might be accepted if it ivere accompanied by a correspondingly increased ductility. --+-
WELDING A MUD-RING. Not long ago an interesting piece of work was done at the St. Augustine shops of the Florida East Coast Railway. It was the welding of a broken mud-ring without removing it from the boiler, and without any serious dismantling of the engine. W hen the work came to be done, it was necessary to cut a piece out of the throat fiheet lOin. by 14in.. also a piece out of the flue sheet Sin. wide and running up to the top of the grate-bars. This did not necessitate bringing the patch into the fire. When this was done, a line of lin. holes was drilled along the fracture in the mud-ring, so as to allow for a free flow of Thermit steel, by which the welding was effected. The ends were then cleaned to a dis- T.tuoe of 2in. from the fracture, after which the ring was expanded 3-16in. to allow for shrink- age. A sort of cup of beeswax was shaped up al)out tiie fracture in the form of a collar 4in. wide and lin. thick at the middle part. The operation of welding the mud-ring was in accord- ance with standard Thermit practice. The method adopted for suspending the crucible was cleverly Accomplished. This was done by what is commonly known in the shops a", an old man" clamped to the running-board bracket of the locomotive, with its arms down. Then a shank was taken from an automatic coupler, drilled, and slipped on to the arm, while another arm. with the crucible ring welded to it. was placed in the hole drilled in the shank. This arrangement held the crucible in position, a.nd it was possible to adjust it in any position de. fired. The ring was heated by means of a gasoline torch for about 50 minutes, until it was brought to a white heat, after which the Thermit was ignited and the Thermit steel poured into the mould. The weld was a most successful one in every respect.—" Railwaj and Locomotive Engineering." ♦
LUMINOUS PROJECTILES. I It is proposed to substitute for searchlights on warships guns firing projectiles which will emit intense light, either during their flight through the air or on striking the water. The short duration of flight, however, appears tc malie the [irst method impracticable. For the production of light on striking the water, calcium carbide is the Liiost suitable substance, as, on contact I with water, it; generates acetylene gas which, when ignited, prwduces a very intense light. The latest form of acetylene or carbide bomb com- prises two cylindrical wooden, shells, which tele- scope together. The inner shell is filled with ralcium carbide, calcium phosphide, and gun- 1 powder, not mixed together. It has an iron I head. and. at its opposite end, an orifice for the rscape of gas. The two wooden cylinders separate immediately on leaving the muz/Je of the gun. and the inner cylinder continues its, flight alone. On striking the water, the pro- jectile. after the first plunge, rises to the sur- face. Water enters the shell, and evolves acety- lene from the carbide, and hydrogen phosphide oi" phosphuretted hydrogen from the calcium phosphide. The hydrogen phosphide ignites spontaneously on contact with the air. and sets fire to the acetylene. The flame is not extinguished, but rather brightened, by contact; with water, so that an intense light is produced, even in a high sea. An intensity of 2.000 candles And a life ef three hours are claimed for these acetylene bombs, and they can be projected to iistances of two miles or more. Yet they form ferv incomplete substitutes for searchlights. They are f little use in the search for hostile torpedo-boats, because they are useful only when he position of the object to be illuminated is ilready approximately known. Even in such a :ase a torpedo-boat could easily escape from the trea illuminated by the bomb heft-re it could be mt by fhe enemy'* guns.
LATE AT NIGHT. I awoke when night was black as ink, The moon had gone to sleep, I think; The starry candles all were gone, And not a single twinkler shone. The corners were so very black, Stuffed up with night in every crack. I sat up straight and looked around, And first the washing-stand I found, And then the window—dim and Palo-- And next the shining towel-rail; But there was something by the door Which surely was not there before. I'm not the sort of boy to be Afraid of everything I see; And if this dark and silent thing Should be a thief come trespassing, I'd rather fight him all alone, And not call out till he was gone. So I climbed down on to the floor, And took my journey to the door; I crept along beside the wall, And past the wardrobe, dark and tall. My teeth were chattering noisily (It was so very cold, you see). The dark thing did not move a bit, And I went up quite close to it. I pulled as hard as hard could be, And down it came all over me. It was my top-coat—nothing more- Which Nurse had hung behind the door! I hurried quickly back to bed, And drew the blankets o'er my head. I never told about that night, And how I went with thieves to fight, 'Cause everyone would tease me so, For fighting my top-coat, I know. —
THE WOLVES AND THE SHEEP. Once on a time, the wolves sent an anabassy to the sheep, desiring that there might Le peace between them for the time to come. Why," said they, should we be for ever waging this deadly strife? Those wicked dogs are the cause of all; they are incessantly bark- ing at us, and provoking us. Send them away, and there will be no longer any obstacle to our eternal friendship and peace." The silly sheep listened, the dogs were dismissed, and the flocks thus deprived of their best protectors, became an easy prey to their treacherous enemy. — 0
BUSY BEES. Julia's mother took her to see the busy bees. They were in three large hives in the garden. There are some little girls who fear to go near to bees; and if they see a bee, they run away in a great fright. That is very silly. Hive-bees are too busy to waste their time in stinging girls or boys, except when they are obliged to do so in self-defence. If Julia were to try to catch one of those bees, the rest would fly about and make a great buzz, and sting her so as to drive her away. They want to make honey to serve them for food during, the winter. It would take a long time to tell you all about bees, and the way in which they build their cells and mak etheir honey. Those who keep bees can make plenty of honey, and wax, and yet manage that the bees may live through the winter. At* one time people used to kill all the poor bees, just to take the honey that they had made. That was not only cruel, but it was un- wise, for if they had let the bees live they would have had more honey from them the next year. In each hive there is one bee larger than the rest. and whom all the bees obey. She is called the Queen Bee. If another Queen Bee were to be put into the hive the two would fight till one of them was killed. ♦——
A FATAL GIFT. Once a man, it is said, was so greedy for gold- though he was already very rich—that he asked the gods in whom the world once believed, for power to turn into gold everything he touched. After some delay his prayer was granted. One morning he woke and found himself possessed of the coveted gift. With what joy he used it! Whatever he touched became pure gold. He touched his bedstead, and its great pillars be- came solid gold. He touched the ornaments in the room, and they were all turned into gold. Just then, when he was thinking to himself, "Noiv I'm the happiest and richest man on earth!" his little daughter, whom he dearly lovwl, came into the room. That morning she had found her pet bird dead in its cage,-and the tears trickled down her face as she came to tell her father and be comforted. "Oh, father!" she said—'anil as he put his hand on her head she suddenly stopped. The father looked down, and there, where his lovely, living daughter had been. stood a lifeless figure of gold! The lips were yet parted, a tear stood on her cheek, in her hand the cage, with the dead bird—all dead, a lifeless statue of gold, beautiful, but cold and dead! The father's lust for gold had slain his be- loved daughter! Ay, more. The man found he could touch the hand of no dear friend without turning him into a heartless image. —
QrEEX WII,HEL)f!X A'8 DOLLS. By Her Governess. The Queen-Mother attached great importance tc the manner in which her child played with her dolls, believing rightly that the elefnent of tenderness might be gradually developed in little girls by encouraging them to handle, treat and think of their dolls as though they were morsels of humanity. To this end a young French girl had spent pome time in the royal household, who, besides teaching the Princess to speak French, had instituted a. style of play with the dolls which was exceedingly charming and absolutely repre- sentative of real life. The so-called "children were always spoken of by their proper names; they had a large establishment of their own furnished with every possible convenience, and on such a scale that the "grown-ups" who happened to be in charge of them could, without discomfort, move about and use the prettily-proportioned furniture. The little family consisted of boys and girls of all sizes and a baby in long clothes. The care of them occupied a great portion of each day, as they were put to bed and got up, taken out for drives or walks, played games. listened to stories, and had their regular meals with as much seriousness as though they were really ex- pected to consume what was placed before them. To the Princess her dolls certainly meant a very great deal, and there is. no doubt whatever that they called forth a wealth of tender, protective love, thought and care, which were great factors in her early education. —
THE GOOD SHEPHERD. A little girl was walking one day with her father over one of-the Wiltshire downs, when she saw a flock of sheep coming up to them. The shepherd was not driving them, but walked in front of them with his crook in his hand, and his dog at his heels. When he stopped, the sheep stopped too; and when he walked briskly on, the sheep trotted quickly after him. Some- times, however, one or two of the hindmost would lag behind, and the shepherd then called to them with a cheery voice, and they soon quickened their pace, and came along with the rest. He led the way to a fold, and the sheep were soon within it, and the shepherd made them safe for the night. How good your sheep are, sir!" said the little girl. Why, miss, they know me well. I lead them in the morning to the green fields, and am always about with them. If they want more food than they can find on the downs, I give it them; if they want water, I lead them to it; if they are ever sick, I tend them. And I know every one of them, from the least to the greatest. And they know me. and soon find out that they are safer and better off by following when I lead." Then," said the little girl, they would be silly sheep if they did not follow you, and mind your voice." Her father was pleased to hear what his little daugh- ter and the shepherd said. "And who is it," lie asked, that takes care of you, my dear, as this shepherd does of his sheep?" "Is it not you, father," said she, "and my mother? You find me food every day, and 1 am always safe when I am at home." No," replied her father. we do no more for you than those old sheep de for their little lambs. We need some one to watch us as well as you. If you have food from us, we must have it from some one greater. And when you sleep, and we sleep at night, there must be some one to ,watch both us and you, if we are to be safe." I know what you mean," said the little girl; fit is God who watches and keeps vs safe." For Influenza take NT.,coels, Great Ptppetmint Cure. Never feils. 1/lj, 2'9
SCALE OF CHARGES. SINGLE COT. Line Inch inser. inser d a. d Parliamentary Notioes, or Notices relat to Sivemment Offices I-sr. Ismentary Election AdC-esses Prospectuses of Public Companies, Lega Notices, Municipal, Urban and Rural Coun- cils, Statement of Accounts, Announce ments, Tenders, &c.06.. 5 0 Sales by Auction 8 2 Parap-aph Advertisements among the News., 0 6.. 5 0 Municipal, Urban, anr Rural Council Election Addresses, Boartf Jf Guardians and Educa- tion Committee Announcements,' Sales by Private Treaty 0 6.. Railway Co.'s Train Service Announcement.. 4 8 Lectures, Sermons, Concerts, Balls, Theatrical and Charitable Entertainments, or Sub- scription Lists, Eisteddfodau, Publications, Public Announcements, &c •• 6 TRADE ADVERTISEMENTS One Insertion 2s Od per inch 1 Sneeia Cash Four Consecutive Inner- t Dis^ntf tmS "a; £ S T*rls*™ Bf l: J *■*««. Double the above Prices a re charged or Double Column Advertisements. CHEAP PREPAID ADVERTISEMENTS. Persons and Situations Wanted, Agency or Traveller, Part nerships, Land, Business Premises, and Businesses to Let or fo Sale, Apartments, or Houses Wanted or to Let, Lost or Found and Miscellaneous Sales and Wants of every description. Class fied under own headings, are charged as follows:- Number Number Insertions. of W orda 1 8 6 13 26 52 d sd sd s d £ s d t d 12 or less ..0 6..1 0..1 9.. 3 ..0 6 6..0 12 0 13 to 24 1 0 2 0 3 9.. 7 6..0 14 0..1 6 0 25 to 32 ..1 6..3 0..5 9.. 12 0..1 2 9..2 4 6 33 to 40 ..2 0..4 0..7 9.. 16 0..1 11 6..3 1 41 to 48 ..2 6..5 0..9 9.. 20 6..2 0 0..3 19 Sd. extra per insertion for every additional 8 words. BIRTHS, MARRIAGES AND DEATHS. Advertisements of Births, Marriages and Deaths.—One Shilling for 20 words, and 3d. each successive worda If booked, 2/6. TO ADVVBTISEKS. We would ask our Advertisers to kindly see that their AdTertitemsats are properly changed, but all copy for change of Ad- vertisement must be to hand not later than 12 soon on Wednesdays, otherwise it can- not be .attended to until the following WEEK igkcomal J makes p 5 good cakes. £ •j CAKEOMA 11 Is the NEW way-the I* K better way—of making cakes. It Is a perfectly pure cake j flour of fine quality, with all C the dry ingredients wanted in IT 1 a cake. The proportions are 1^ *6 exact and the mixing is per* £ fect. It saves time and trouble, ~jj and it makes the nicest and |T lightest cakes possible. IT It makes any and every 1# jJ cake and not only one kind. Lp And it Is economical in 8* use-it costs less than the 2* old-fashioned way. 3* From all Grocers, Stores. and Bakers n In the British Isles. In 3id. packets, each I* one containing a sheet of useful and 3# j practical cake red pes. J LATHAM & Co., Ltd., g* H LIVERPOOL. g* a B? T&Bi) p YYYrnrvrnrYVYV
THE POWER OF PLANT VA-FE. Last summer we noticed an extraordinary In- rtruice of plant growth, illustrating the great fctrcngth and hardiness of the ordinary plantain )eiif. During the course of some experiments we constructed a pitch floor as follows. The ground was scraped, and then a three-inch layer ol sand was spread over it, and on this sand a two-inch layer of soft roofing pitch was placed. This had been down for several weeks when we noticed one part of the pitch breaking open like a miniature volcano. On examination we found some green shoots comin-g through the pitch. The shoots continued to grow in spite of the great heat caused by the 8un shining on the black surface of the pitch. They finally assumed a flourishing condition. It skolild be added that before laying the sand a sheet of heavy tar paper covered the ground.—"The Strand Maga- l!)
LIMITATIONS OF WE-KLTIT. Wealth does not add to the largeness and liberty of life, as we who do not poseese it are apt to imagine. If poverty has its limitations, wealth has also. If there are many things which the poor cannot do because they are poor, there are many things which the rich cannot do because they are rich. Mrs. Crcneus cannot en- tertain this season at her country house because ehe has only four servants; Mrs. Lazarus, with no servant at all, and with four children, has a friend of her husband's in her hospitable guest- room every Sunday. Mrs. Croesus cannot ride to the village, for one member of one of her two horses is lame and the other horse is busy; Mrs. Lazarus walks with keen enjoyment. Mrs. Croesus has two gardeners to tend her hot- houses and her newer-beds. What does she know of the freedom of Mrs. Lazarus, who pores over the florists* catalogues to see how she can secure the richest colour combinations with her meagre allowance for flowers, and digs joyously in the black mould, and watches the children of her love and tending coming up to greet her? Mrs. Croesus had a nursery-maid for the baby and a governess for the next in years; Mrs. Lazarus sings her awn babes to sleep, teaches them their first lessons, and lives over her happy childhood by living with them in their own imaginary world.From The Girls* Own Paper and Woman's Magazine."
BACHELORS. All men are born bachelors, few remain so until they die. It is the years between 20 and 20 which are generally fatal to that state, and translate the majority of us into married men. Marriage is not as inevitable as death, neither is it as peaceful. Sometimes the danger of succumbing is slight, and men pass through the critical period without trouble, sometimes much skill and finesse and a certain measure of luck are needed. Something depends on the shape of the bachelor's nose, and something on tins conditions of his bank-book. At thirty the bachelor approaches his prime; most of his com- rades have fallen by the way; he has probably supported victims to Hymen at the altar, knows the cost of christening-mugs and rocking-horses, and (at second-hand) wkat wives say to their husbands when they are annoyed with them. The next ten years see the danger of his joining the ranks of married men lessening; in the next it dwindles almost to nothingness; at fifty the edds are about twenty to one on the bachelor, and no takers. Look at Mr. Balfour; he has long been regarded as a hopeless case. How many matrons in the past have decided he would do for Mabel, or Gertrude, or Annabel, as the case might be, and risen early in the morning to encompass his downfall! And the nets were set and the pitfalls dug and the traps laid—in vain. The politician triumphed; he has proved his skill and resource in evading capture, and the freedom of the forests of May- fair and the groves of Berkeley-square are his. His career is a guide and beacon to younger men who wish to follow in his foosteps; faint. hearted bachelors, thinking of his success, will see what dogged determination may do.—From an amusing essay on "Bachelors," which ap- pasuv in the Windsor Magazine."
Business Efficient Biilposting. Parties desirous of having Bills Posted on ALL the most IMPORTANT AdvertisBmenit HOARDINGS in the District of Rhyl, Presta- tyn, Meliden, Dyserth, Rhuddlan, and S1 Asaph should send their Orders to BEECH BROS. T'M. vb-i -id District BILLPOSTERS. Advertising and Bfllosting Contractors. Head Office: 3, KINMEL STREET RHYL Ye Olde Firm. Established 1868. Our Hoardings Are Good, Substantial, and Well Kept. Our Positions Are the very best obtainable, situate at ali points of advantage to Advertisers, aad i8 MAIN THOROUGHFARES. Our Facilities Are Up-to-date for the Expeditious Fvartinf of Bills in Town or Country. Owners of the Billposting Business of the NORTH WALES PUBLICITY ASSOCIATION Members for Rhyl of the United Billposters' Association. Send us your requirements and we shall b* pleased to quote for Billposting in any part of the UNITED KINGDOM. All work under the DIRECT PERSONA) SUPERVISION of the Proprietor— All communication to MRS. BEECH, Manager, W. KELLY. Practical Billposter and Advertising Expert. Walter C. Davies HOUSE AND CHURCH DECORATOR 1, WATERLOO VILLAS WELLINGTON ROAD. WE GIVE FOR A GUINEA Ki'i rv»|>-nine Witney Blankets, each Blanket bound pink :111'<1 rarly for use; I Pair White Pillow Cases, full size, bt:llon<:d enels; I WhiteCounterpaue,3 yds. long by 2^ yds. wuie. >voveii pattern, good design; I Duehesse Toilet Set. sr»t Carriage Paid 0" receipt ojP.O.O. BROOKFtELDS, Market Sq., STAFFORD. ESTARLfSHEP OVER too VEAPS. /^lYCLE.—Marvellous sacrifice. Gent's new 1907 Machine, highest grade, fitted with Clincher tyres, Crab be roller, lever rim brakes, back and front, the very latest Perry's 1907 ball bearing free wheel, plated rims, coloured centres, frame black enamelled, and gold liaed, mudguards; magnificent machine, not soiled, complete with gas lamp, bell, pump, spanner, etc. Great bargain, JB4 10s., worth double. Will send on approval any distance before cash senL-" HOUSE," St. Madge, Pitman Road, Westo u-sucer-Mare. IMPORTANT TO MOTHERS.—Every Mother J. who values the Health and Cleanliness of her Child should use ABLE" NURSERY POMADE. One applies- tion kills all Nits IL.1& Vermin, beautifies and strengthens the Hair. In Tins, 4!d. and 9d. Postage Id.—Geo. W. Harrison, Chemist, 118, Broad Street, Reading. Agent for Rihyl—G. E. €r rat ton, Chemist, 2, Queen's Square, and 20, Aquarium Street; St. Asaph—-J. Emrys Jon", Chemist; Denbigh—Harrison Jones and Co., Chemists; Colwyn Bay—J. H. Adfcmwoa. Sywell House School s Boys RHYL. Course of Instruction:—ENGLISH SUBJECTS, FRENCH, CLASSICS, MATHEMATICS, BOOK-KEEPING, and SHORTHAND BOARDER RECEIVED. Headmaster—F. WELSH, B.A. Next Term 15th September. H Established 1874. Q WILLIAM llCKERSGILL, Undertaker. SRul bOFk 361, Wellington Road. RESIDENCE- 50 Wellington Road. Awarded 2 First Prizes, London, 1895 and 1898. HIGH-CLASS LUNCHEON & TEA ROOMS. PhillipThomas COOK AND CONFECTIONER, AVONDALE RESTAURANT AND HYGIENIC STEAM BAKERY, 63, HIGH STREET, RHYL Dishes, Veal and Ham, Beef-steak and KidMJ Pies to Order. MILK BREAD, HOVIS, FAMILY BREAD Delivered to all parts of the Town. Excellent Assortment of Lunch, Madeira, u4 other Kinds of Cakes for Afternoon Tea., A Good Variety of Fancy Bex Chocolates, a.. NOTE THE ADDRECS—2 DOORS FROM THE POSC OFFICE. Hotels Visitors to Rhyl Should not tail to SEE LATE Sir H. M. Stanley's Home The Cross Foxes Hotel Glascoed nr. St. Asaioh All the Coaches through Bryn-y-pin Pass (The Switzerland of Wales) stop here. It is a pleasant walk from Rihudaian or St Asapb Picture Postcards of the old home may be purchased here. Wines, Spirits, Cigars, T. EASTHAM. Proprietor. Mona Hotel QUEEN ST. & MARKET ST., RHYL. High-Class Family and Commercial Hotel. Wines & Spirits of the Choicest Brand. Proprietor TOM ROGERS, of St. Helens. UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT. LORE IIOTEL, HIGH STREET MARKET STREET, RHYC (Near (Post Office and Sea). Noted for ALES Drawa from the Wood. FREE FOR WINES AND SPIRITS, Which are of the Choicest 'Brands. ALL ORDERS PROMPTLY ATTENDED TO. Proprietor, W. DARE, (Late of Windsor Vaults, Rhyn. T. IIULLEY, BAR AND CONFECTIONER, FAMILY GROCER AND TEA DEALER, Castle Temperance Hotel KINMEL STREET, RHYL. Froah Supply ef Butter aw4 Egg. always on hand. First-class accommodation for Visitors aa4 Commercial Travellers. rRI J A T& APARTMENTS. Businesses. POWELL'S BALSAM WII.L CORE YOCR CoraH Powell's Balsam of Aniseed.—For CoupliB, Colds. Powell's Balsam of Aniseed.—Bronchitis, Asthma, Powell's Balsam of Aniseed.—Influenza, Night Cough. Powell's Balsam o Aniseed.—Safe and Reliable. Relieves Instantly Of all Chemists, Is. 1 2s, 3d. & Set minder.rll B t C (I Ut fir-. • • T. Amos Jones (BARITONE VOCALIST), DOUJBLE MEDAtLISTf, R AM., TEACHER OF SINGINa, & Terms ior Oratorio, Ballad, and other Concert*, Eiateddtfodau, etc., on application. 72, West Parade, Rhyl Apply for Agents' terms, to Agency Dept., Lipton Ltd., City Road, London, E.C. Can do a big and profitable business by sellinf Lipton's Tea, Coffee. Jams And other articles of cvery-iay household consumption. We assist pushing Agent9 in every possible wa with liberal and varied suDplie* of ad CHESTEK STEAM LAUNDRli Victoria Road # (CloM by the Northgate Station;. CHESTER. 1 All the arrangements are on the most ap- proved modern system for Washing, Ironing, Drying, Packing, &c., and the management most efficient. W. H. LIPSHAM, Secretary & General Manager) (Chester S4.a.m Laundry Co., Lta.) Telephone No. 411. inspection is specially invited on any day excepting Mondays and Saturdays. Charles Egerton House, Sign and Decorative Painter* Paper-hanger, &c., 10. ELWY STREET, RHYL ESTABLISHED 1833. Oils, Paints, Colours, and Varnishes always fa Stock. A good selection of WALL-PAPERS and Pattern Books, by the best makers. Agent for Messrs. John Line and All Wall Papers. Boneing and Larding a Speciality. THE OLDEST ESTABLISHED FISH SHOJI &c., IN THE TOWN. WalterClarke&Son Fruiterers, Fishmongers, Poulterers, and Licensed Dealers in Game. 2 and 3, WATER STREET, And 2 and 3, MARKET HALU ACENTS FOR HORNER'S CREAMS, Telephone, 11.. c;j