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CHIT CHAT. A NEW SORT of harp and violin strings have been introduced as more sonorous than the Roman strings, while at the same time they are more dura- ble, and capable of resisting all atmospheric influ- ences, which have often proved fatal to harmony in theatres aud rooms. BY A RA (N-GAuor- kept at the hall of the Leeds Philosophical and Literary Society, it appears that, in the Month of September this year, there has fallen sixteen times as much rain as in the same month last year. THE VINTAGE has been GOT in throughout the Moselle district. The weather has not been favour. able, and the grapes, though rather abundant, are not expected to produce wine of as good a quality as usual. THE INVERNESS HARRIERS lately found a hare in the neighbourhood of Fort George, which, after a beautiful run, was seen to take to the sea under the walh of tLe Fort. The hounds were hallooed for- ward, and reached the strand ere their gatne got out above 60 yards The pack gallantly taking the water, a most interesting ea hunt took place, when one of the dotts, Old flimbo, maintaining his leading character by sea as well as by lat,d, swam into poor puss, and bore her ashore in triumph. THE ELDEST SO of Prince Polignac has entered the Bavarian army. ANOTHER SUICIDE AT LONDON MOXOMENT.— Last week, a lad, about 16, precipitated him- self from the Monument, in Fish-street Hill. On his being taken up it was found life was Extinct. THE MYSTERY UNRAVELLEO.—A lady of rank complained to her fashionable shoemaker, that her shoes had burst on the first day of wearing them. Upon which, taking them up, and glancing his eye at the sole, he exclaimed, Oh, I don't wonder; I see clearly how it has happened! Why, yo"r ladyship has walked in them." PHYSICIANS OF THE HOUSEHOLD.—A gentleman who was aecustomed to take his regular exercise on horse-back, and whose chief drink was asses-milk, was asked by an invt)i|^ friend, to whom a doctor was daily administering pil!and draughts, How he contrived to keep always in such excellent' heabh, and what medical man lie employed?" To which the other gravely replièd," jUy physician is a horse, and my apothecary is an ass." WHAT flower is emblematic of a fop addicted to fighting ?—The dandy-lion. EPIGRAM. I'll laugh at them that laugh at me," Dick cries You'l be for ever laughing," Will replies. MARCH OF INTELLIGENCE.—"Jim, How does the thermometer stand to-day "-I- ours siondi% on the mantel-piece, right agin the plasterin.New York Paper. COMFORT for the Gloofny:-Affixed to a cottage in Cook's-grounds, Chelsea, is a printed notice that the inmate goes out cheering THE NUMEROUS ACCIDENTS which have occurred in the Old Bailey since it has been paved with wood have at length awakened the City authorities to the expediency of making some alteration, and workmen have been employed in "nolchillg" the wooden blocks. IMMIGRANTS AT QUEBEC.—The number or pas- i-esiger- arrived at Quebec, to the 8th of September, this year, was 70C,0. In the same time last year, 2605. CHATHAM RACES.—A new species of race is to come on between two zebras, that have been training for the purpose for some time past. PATRICK," said an employer, the other morning to one of his workmen, "yoo came too, late this morning; the other men were at work an hour before you." 11 Sure, and I'll be even with 'em to night, then." '• How, Patrick ?" Why faith, I'll quit an hour before them all, sure." A PROPERTY OP STONE.—A Mr. John Malcott, in a letter to the Times newspaper repecting. stone for public buildings, mentions a property which we do not remember to have seen noticed before, viz., that all stone made uxe of in the immediate neigh- bourhood of its own quarries is more likely to endure the atmosphere than if it be removed therefrom, though only 30 or 40 miles. FEMALE CO-,dPoSITOR!The New York Evening Post states, that the practice of employing women at the compositor's case, is gradually making its way in America, in spite of the opposition which it has experienced. LONG POALMS—At a meeting of the Perth Town Council, held 011 Monday week, Mr Kiunoch, pre. centor in the Wet Church, gave in his resignation, which was accepted. Councillor Menzies remarked, that, according to teport, Mr Kinnoch had been in- duced to resign from the enormously "long psalms he had to sing on Sunday. No human lungs could stand it.-Perth Chronicle. KILLIVG THE I)gVIL.-A country girl- attending a Qtiakei- meeting, asked by a friend how she liked it. 's Like it! why I see no sense in sitting for hours, without saying a word it is enough to kill the devil." YeF., my dear," replied he, that is just what we want."—American Paper. Are your city ordinances strictly kept ? asked a stranger, in reference to the ordinance prohibiting the selling and firing of backers, torpedos, &c. Oil yes, sir, they arc kept in the clerk's office." That seems to be the only Place where they are kept. A CORRECT ANTW5".—Madam, do you think frock coats are becor)si)tg garments ?—" No, sir, they are garments already." —-American Paper. SMELL OF THE SHOP.—-A field preicher, who had been a printer, observed, in the usual harrangue, "that youth might be compared to a comma, man- hood to a semicolon, Old a.-e to a Olon to which death puts a period or full stop, A SruMP OnATOIl, who wished to conciliate some Germans previous to an Section, observed, that though he was not a German himself, yet he had a brother who was I-einarkably fond of German sausa- ges.-American paper. NOT LOST.-A gentIcmao crossing a narrow bridge, asked a countryman whom he met, if it was not dangerous, and whether people were not lost there sometimes?—" No,' he replied, "I never knew auy body lost here in my life; several have been drowned, but they were all found again." EITHER WAY wlL1, Do.—«< Will you have me, Sarah ? said a young man to a modest girl. I- No, John, said she, y°° may have me if yo" will." RAILWAY CARRIAGES V. CLOUDS.—"That there cloud," said a Yankee, pointing to one, the shadow of which was passing rapidly over the ground, "is trying to go ahead of the engine. I g-uess it'-Il be behind UIi and 20 minutes to. spare. We can get a- head of the fastest cloud going now, and give it time to take in water.Ainerican Paper. QUITE HANDY.—There's a gentleman in New York whose face has become so wrinkled by his constant exposure, that his wife uses it to grind nut- megs on. WHBTTUG A RAZOR.—A young fop, who had just begun to shave ior beard, went into a barber's shop, and after a grand swagger, desired to be shaved. The barber went through the usual movement, and the young sprig jumped up with a flourish, exclaim- ing, U Maw foine fellow, what's your chawge?" "Oh, no charge," was the reply. No chawge! how's that?" -1 Why, \ve iu-e always very thankful when we can get soft oaK fkva (to whet our razors on.-American Paper, -< What town was Chahlrey like'when he was making a bust of a celebrated authoress?— Chipping— Norton." Dr. John Thomas, Bishop of Lincoln, was married four times, the motto, or poesy, 011 the wedding ring, on his fourth marriage, was- if I sarvive, I'll make them five." PLEBEIAN PLEASANTRY.—A French Abbe, who was ex'remely corpulent coming late one evening to a fortified town, asked a countryman whom he met, If lie could get in at the gate?" I should think you might," said the peasant, looking at him jocosely, for I saw a wagon of hay go III tllli morning." RATHER LANGUID. A friend of ours," say. the editor of an American paper, "is growing weaker and weaker every day; he has got so weak now that he can't raise five dollars." THE MARQUIS OF HUNTLEY'S FAILURE has ex- cited considerable sensation. His debts are said to average 9600,000, whilst, from the schedule of funds, it appears there are not 1.. 6cl. per pound likely to be realized to pay the debts. This tOWII suffers only d £ l0,000 Dundee, £ 20,000 5 Montrose, £ 30,000 and Aberdeen, £ 100,000. The noble marquis has gone ad interim to Paris.-Arbroath Herald. There is a man down east, rather a facetious chap, whose name is New. He named his first child Some- thing, as it was Something NeW. His next child was christened Nothingtil beillg Nothing New. CUTTING A SON OFF.—Sheridao, having threat- ened his son Tom to cut him off with a shilling, re- ceived this retort-16 Where will you get it." CHARLES KEAN, we regret to say is dangerously ill in New York, and totally unable to fulfil^ his en- gagement at the National Theatre. The local journal., entertain very alarming apprehensions for his speedy recovery.