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PILES.

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HOMOCEA INSTANTLY TOUCHES…

EXANO (HOMOCEA FORT)

HOMOCEA SOAP. HOMOCEA SOAP.

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me as iflll& tined-off herrings. Cut away, yoi» young son of the gutter, and fill de pottel." "Yes, Mr. Kleckser," replied the boy, starting off upon his errand. He came back in a minute, as if struck by a sudden idea, and whispered confiden- tially, I say, Mr. Kleckser, sir, vould you like it hieed 11" Hiced!" exclaimed the German. "Vhat you mean, imp?" Vhy, with the chill on, o' course," returned Pordy. "Vhat else? Look 'ere, Mr. Kleckser. I'll tell yer 'ow I does it. Fust I pumps the bottle nearly full. Then I goes to the pastrycook's round the corner There they keeps them spicy tarts and the shaky stuff-vhat d'yer call it ? Oh, blaak mangy. Veil, they've got hiced vater there, too: an' so I says to the svell vith the vhite hapron behind the counter, says I, Mr. van Flewker sends his complimunks, 'e does, an' he'd like some hiced vater.' Then the svell fays, says 'e, I There it is in the filter.' All right,' says 1. So I fills up the bottle from the filter with the hice-cold vater, vifceh it's fit to friz your innards till yer might skate upon 'em, and that 'ere hices the lot. Now d'yer hunderstand ? Poor beggars!" added the boy compassionately, half aside; I elpose they don't know vhat hiced vater his in furrin parts." chap 20 Get avay, leetel humbug!" roared Kleekser, half amused, half angry at the novel recipe, while the other clerks exploded with glee. "Fetch de vater dis instant, or I'll pull your tonkey ears to tvice their longness. Veil, I'm sure, retorted Pordy. That's all a cove gets for vantin' to do another cove a sarvice. See if I 'elps yer agin, that's all!" Vill you pe off, I say!" cried Kleckser, snatching up a ruler and throwing it with an aim at the errand- boy's head that only failed by reason of his ducking. This movement caused that missile to strike M. Par- landet, that moment entering, a smart blow in the region called by the learned the epigastrium, and changed the benevolent smile beaming over that worthy gentleman's countenance to an expression of severe anguish The errand-boy disappeared, leaving behind him a tableau. Kleckser still in the attitude of the quoit- thrower who has launched his discus, horror gradually creeping over his face, and raising his hair as he per- ceives the effect of his shot. M. Parlandet, who has sunk into a chair near the door, clasping his hands in dolor over the affected spot, rocking to and fro in fruitless gaspings to recover breath. The three clerks at the desk, divided between their sense of the ridiculous, and of the impropriety of laughing. Whereunto are added, presently, the blue goggles of Mynheer Fabian van Flewker himself, who has fol- lowed his manager to say a final word, glaring in at the door in mute amazement upon the scene. "M. Kleckser exclaimed the merchant, "can you explain what is the meaning of all this ? What is the matter with you? What ails M. Parlandet?" I-inteet-really-yes-M. Parlandet," floun- dered unhappy Kleckser, blushing up to the roots of his hair, then becoming dumb. "Explanatory, doubtless, monsieur," observed the merchant, drily. Still, I fail to gather from your lucid explanation what has exactly taken place. M. Parlandet, I appeal to you. Will you favour me with some interpretation which I can understand of this singular scene ?" Kleekser cast a piteous glance at Parl, who man- fully came to the rescue. It was not worth his while to make an enemy, even of so comparatively unim- portant a person as the foreign correspondent, and the opportunity he considered he now had of secur- ing Kleckser's gratitude was too good to be thrown away. M. van Flewker, my esteemed and honoured benefactor," commenced Parl. He had by this time recovered breath, and now placed himself in his favourite position for making a speech-one hand in his left waistcoat arm-hole, the other blandly flourished in mid air. Van Flewker had sown the whirlwind, and must reap the storm. He had tapped the stream of elo- quence, and must stem the deluge of its burst. He shrugged his shoulders philosophically, straddled across a chair, leant his chin upuu its back, looked at Pari, and listened. The manager began But two minutes since, M. van Flewker, I was listening to the words of wisdom flowing from your honoured lips, and was happy. I was, apparently, in the enjoyment of my usual excellent health. Now, esteemed benefactor, I have received a warning that I am mortal-that I must die In one word, beloved patron, a sudden and afflicting spasm of the heart smote me as I crossed this threshold, and I sank into a chair powerless, breathlex,, helpless, the pitiful wreck you He expanded his arms to their fullest extent as he concluded, and stood before Van Flewker like a sign- post. The merchant nodded, and opened his mouth. Before he could speak, M. Parlandet instantly turned on the flood again. You will say that affords no explanation of the appearance presented by M. Kleekser. But M. Kleckser is y,ung, he is kind-hearted and noble, he is my frieud. Beholding me stricken down suddenly,' helpless and gasping, in the flower of my age, his instant impulse was to rush to my assistance. He must have been arrested in his career by his horror at perceiving what his inexperience doubtless took for the hues of impending dissolution overspreading my pallid coutenance." Emotion here apparently stopped M. Parlandet's further utterance. His explanation seemed satis- factory, although his face, ruddy with rouge, rendered its veracity a trifle doubtful. Van Flewker nodded, rose from his chair, and was quietly leaving the room with the remark So that was all," when his.eye fell upon the fatal ruler which had temporarily impeded M. Parlandet's breath. And that, M. P ar landet. p., he asked. chap 20 For that, respected benefactor." answered Pari, promptly, lam unable to account, except that in M. Kleckser's benevolent anxiety for my welfare, it may, perhaps, insensibly have escaped from his nerveless hand, and have flown towards me Van Fiewker smiled. The tale was ready-witted, though, as it happened, he knew every word of it to be false. For, having run against Pordy in the passage, and cuffed his ears for not takinsr better care, the boy in his eager self-defence had blurted out the actual reason of his sudden exit from the counting- house. Very ingenious, M. Parlandet," said the merchant, and quietly walked away. Farl gazed after his chief for a moment with a look of dismay; then, suddenly recovering his spirits, snapped bis lingers, and addressed himself to Kleckser. Dear Mr. Kleckser." he said, with a smile; I am awar§_of the warmth of yourfriendshin. Favour me- A

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