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[A.LL RIGHTS RESERVED].
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[A.LL RIGHTS RESERVED]. TECHNICAL AGRICUL- TURAL EDUCATION. a- No. 7. TECHICAL EDUCATION IN RELATION T9 DAIRY FARMING. BY PROFESSOR JAMES LONG, (Author of "British Dairy Farming," "The Dairy Farm," &c.) It is quite possible that the critical reader may question the value of technical educa- tion to the practical dairy farmer, but the term is a comprehensive one, and it is quite as possible to oonvey information to the prac- titioner through the medium of experimental work and -of scientific investigation" as it is to convey it to his sons in the class room. farmers have been educated through the medium of science very consilerably during the last ten years. The majority of thinking and reading men among them have derived immense information and advantage from the investigations of chemists in connection with artificial manures and feeding stuffs, to say nothing of the important information which has been derived from the examination of soil and the study of the physics of agricul- ture; if suoh a term may be employed. CONCERNING MILK. The business of the dairy farmer is to pro- duce milk, or, to put it iu a more concrete form, milk solids, through the medium of good cattle fed upon suitable foods. We are quite aware that where milk is sold in its natural state the proportion of solids which it contains is never carefully regarded by the producer, so long as it reaches the standard which the wholesale buyer institutes; but where butter and cheese are manufactured upon the farm, or where milk is sent to the factory for such manufacture, the percentage of solids is of immense importance, and it becomes the study of the farmer to produce as high a percentage as he possibly cm. To enable him to do this, hundreds of experi- ments have been made both in the laboratory and in the dairy. Digestion experiments have been conduoted upon almost all breeds of cattle and upon various systems of feeding. Machinery and implements have been inven- ted with the express purpose of extracting the highest possible percentage, either of fat, as in the butter dairy, or of total solids, as in the cheese dairy. A study has been made of the systems of cropping most likely to conduce to the best results in milk manufac- ture and, in France in particular, scientific men, who are at the same time praotical farmers, have made calculations based upon actaal farm work, to enable them to show how the highest percentage of nitrogenous foods can be produced upon the farm, inas- much as both the quantity and quality of milk depend to a greater extent upon the nitrogenous plants of the farm, containing what are generally desoribed as albuminoids, than upon any others. There is, therefore, a vast field for the exercise of both experi- ment and investigation, which will enable the advocates of technical instruction to carry it as close home to the practitioners of to-day as to those to the future. TECHICAL KNOWLEDGE ON A DAIRY FARM. In times past it has been argued that dairying could only be conduoted with success in particular districts, and it has been the commonest of all occurrences in all parts of England to hear particular soils and even farms described as unsuitable for such an occupa- tion. Undoubtedly there is some truth in these suggestions, bat the troth lies more in the fact that they are inconveniently situated as regards proximity to town or rail, or that a portion of the acreage is better adapted for sheep breeding, as much in consequence of the assistanoe sheep render in manuring as from any other oause. Where, however, it is possible to grow either good grass or good clover, mangolds, and vetches, there need be little apprehension as to the possibility of conducting dairy work with sucoess. The possibility of producing in abundanoe the most suitable plants for dairy cattle is the point which should determine whether a soil is suitable or not, and it is this possi- bility which is best disclosed where in- struction steps in to the aid of those who have not full knowledge of the subject, whe- ther that instruction is derived from a lec- turer upon dairy farming or from the published results of careful investigation. Again, given the possibility of producing all the requisite crops, the next question is how to produce the maximum quantity and this may be followed by another question, how to protect them against their many enemies, the insects, the birds, the parasitio fungi, and, lastly, from the weather. All these subjects are being dealt with in a more or less com- prehensive manner by those who are respon- sible for the information which instructors teaoh. The instructor himself may not be a person who has conducted original work, it is seldom that this is the case, but he derives his information in these days not so much from the study of any one particular work as from the study of current investigation, whe- ther it be conducted in this or in other coun- tries. It is, however, his duty to discriminate between work that is true, and work—and there is much of it—which mast be rejected, either because it has not been accurately per- formed, or because it has not been confirmed in a sufficient number of instances. It is educa- tion alone which enables the instructor and the same study that enables the student, and especially the former, to reject untrustworthy and to accept trustworthy data. MUCH TO LEARN. Farming is very largely conducted by rale of thumb. Experienced, thoughtful, labouring men are very often as well acquainted with the management of the land on which they have worked for a number of years as the men who employ them, and their knowledge is frequently of considerable use to their iemployers. Old farmers, like old labourers, are able to discriminate with wonderful accu- racy, and their advice is not to be rejeoted off- hand. The fact is that experience and obser- vation have taught them during the course bf years to a large extent what science, which is based upon observation, teaches the student. Farming, and especially dairy farming, is allied, and closely allied, too, to more sciences than one. We have suggested that it is largely indebted to chemistry, for the chemist has not only taught us how the plant is constituted, how it feeds and grows, but he has shown us what constituents of foods the plants of the farm especially prefer. The astounding importance of this informa- tion and of the data upon which it is based ought to be grasped by every occupier of the Boil who is tc-day dealing with material Which under such circumstances would unfold another world before his eyes. If but one farmer in ten were enabled by means of the present educational system to digest the details which show him how the plant feeds upon the constituents of the air and upon the elements of the soil excellent results will be achieved. The possession of such know- ledge could not fail to lead him further, and hi* anxiety to laaro will direct him to pursue his studies, even though they be but ele- mentary, into those fields which under the guidance of the scienoes of botany, geology, and kindred subjeots will enable him to some extent to discriminate between the plants of the varied soils around him, and of the insect life, at least that which is mainly responsible for the attempted destruction of his crops. It is true there is a good deal to learn. Science itself has so far failed to explain much that we desire to know, but the infor- mation will come in good time, and it will be obtained the- more rapidly if efforts are made by those who are responsible for the large sums of money now in the hands of the county counoils to provide for the indirect teaching which investigation would afford, as well as to provide for direct teaching, which is now becoming so general upon the majority of dairy farms. A large proportion of the albuminous matter in milk is removed from the farm. The produoer is therefore anxious to learn how to replace this matter, which is of the highest importance to the maintenance of the fertility of the farm, at the least expense. If in the production of large quantities of milk a demand is made for nitrogenous foods, it follows that in order to produce such foods a similar demand must be made upon the soil, and therefore it is to the soil that the farmer must ultimately look. The dairy farmer pure and simple has not the assistance of sheep or of the manure of highly feed cattle. Cows' manure is one of the poorest manurial matters produced on the farm, and recourse must therefore be had to other means of maintaining fertility; we believe that there is no subject connected with dairy farming which can be better studied or taught with greater efficacy. ESSENTIAL KNOWLEDGE. One of the most important branches of knowledge in connection with dairy farming is that which explains the properties of manures and an economical system of manu- ring the soil for the production of certain crops. The dairy farmer depends very much for the production of milk upon the crops he grows, but in many instances he depends too much upon foods wh'ch he is obliged to pur- chase. There is no question about the fact that the cost of such foods would be very largely diminished if by the aid of knowledge he grew them upon his own farm. The constituents of food, which are the principal agents in milk production, are the albuminous or nitro- genous constituents, which he finds in cotton cake, linseed cake, bran, malt dust, and beans. These constituents are absolutely essential, and when mixed in recognised quantities with the commoner and cheaper foods pro- duced upon the farm, such as swedes, man- golds, and straw, they compose a good ration, and the result is therefore a practical and successful one. We cannot see, however, any reason why this system of purchase should not be diminished by the growth of nitro- genous foods which will answer the same purpose. During the summer season we should select vetches, clover—including Trifolium incarnatum -in the south of England, lucerne and sainfoin where these crops will grow, and, under certain con- ditions, beans and peas. The two latter crops may alternate with the olovers in the four- oourse rotation, when the olovers will pro- bably grow all the better for the change. Now it so happens that scientific discoveries during the past two years have shown that all these leguminous crops have the faoulty of obtaining most of their nitrogen from the air-it is un- neoessary here to discuss the medium. They are therefore called nitrogen collectors or gatherers, and are consequently of extreme value upon the farm, because they do not rob it materially of the most valuable of all the constituents of manure and plant foods. If these crops, instead of being sold off the farm, are oonsumed by the cattle and returned to the farm in the form of manure, it is evident that the soil is enriched by this gratuitous nitrogen, so that less money is expended in artificial nanure, or in other words larger oorn crops are grown with the same system of cultivation than would otherwise be the case. Upon a soil where nitrogenous crops, such as the above, are systematically grown, there is always an accumulation of fertility, that is supposing they are not removed from the farm. Where, however, in addition to their con- sumption, a stock-feeder, suoh as a dairy farmer, is a regular buyer of cake, there is a further addition to the most valuable of manurial constituents and it can scarcely fail to achieve superior results. We can conoeive of no branch of dairy farming which is of greater importance than this. It is undoubtedly essential that milk should be produced, that butter of the highest type should be made, and that cheese should be perfect, but neither the one nor the other can be successfully carried out unless attention is given to the subject to which we have referred. Peoun ary success depends upon the economy of the system foliowed -the growth of leguminous crops, where this is possible, is the most economical of all systems. Hence, if this fact is recognised, and if it is also recognised that such foods as are bought should be those which are highest in nitrogenous properties—such as cotton cake —because of their double value as a food for the animal, and, subsequently, as a food to the soil, there need be no fear as to the result.
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The yard was originally the length of a king's arm; the foot the length of his pedal extremities, The height of the Emperor Napoleon 1. was about 5ft. 7in. The Duke of Wellington, at Waterloo, was about 5ft, Skin. in stature. It is computed by statisticians that about 55,000 persons in the British Isles die annually from phthisis alone. Somebody has computed that if 32,000,000 people should clasp hands they could reach around the earth. A medical journal deolares that a healthy man will suffer more from the prick of a pin than he would from the pains of dissolution in case he died a natural death. The sensory nerves convey to the mind im- pressions of what transpires in the external universe. In them the speed of the-current is from 50ft, to 100ft. a second, The thickness of the human hair varies from the 250th to the 600th part of an inch; blonde hair is the finest, and red the coarsest It was once customary in this country for a person going abroad to put out a certain sum of money on condition of receiving good interest for it on his return home. If he never returned, the deposit was forfeited.
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THE Editor of the Medical Annual for 1890 points out that potash is largely used to add to the solubility °* many of the Cocoas at present sold, but that, in marked contrast, MESSRS. CADBUKY supply an abso- lutely pure Cocoa ot the highest quality; and that the name OADBURY on any packet of Cocoa or Chocolate is a RUaraneed of purity. Lc5 C. BRANDAUER AND Co.'s "Circular-pointed Pens" neither scratch nor spur the points being rounded a new process. Seven Prize Medals awarded.— u ia. *a al3° drawn to O. B. and Co.'s new 8eries of Pens," whioh offers the novel advantage of one pattern being made in four degrees of flexibility, and each in three widths of points.—Ask your Stationer for a 6d, assorted Sample Box, of either eenes, Lea
A Lucky Joke.
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A Lucky Joke. It's only a piece of fun," said Millicent Manton. Everybody must do something for amusement. And it is 80 cruelly, fiendishl y dull at San Jean I" Dull, eh ?" Her eldest brother-elder by a good score of years—shrugged his shoulders. You find it dull, do you ? Well, you must remember that you insisted on coming, in spite of all our remonstrances. You thought it was a military post, eh, and that there was some flirting to be done ? Well, you've found out your mistake by this time. Yes, I have," frankly admitted Miss Man- ton, clasping her hauds on top of her curly head. And I wish to goodness I was back in dear old Chicago But in the meantime I must try and keep myself alive." Hugh Manton regarded her sternly. Who was that letter to P" he asked. To Phyllis Perkins, the schoolma'am." Humph I didn't know she was a favourite of yours." Neither is she." Why are you corresponding with her P" "I'm not. That letter was not from me it was from David Belfield, the express agent- or at least so she will suppose. He wants to see her-or at least so she will think—up at the station. And she'll go to him. She's just fool enough for that. How he will stare! And how she'll long for the cracks in the rail- way platform to open wide enough for her to be able to slip through and vanish from his sight 1" And Milly laughed exultingly. Her brother's eyes met in a dark frown. Is that your idea of fun ? said he. Milly nodded. A splenditl joke," said she. "Such a piece of prim perfection as that Yankee schoolma'am is. I haven't forgotten yet what a scornful look she gave me that night I was teasing poor little lieggv Willis at the sheet and pillow-case party. If David Belfield gives her another such glance when she presents herself uninvited at the station I shall feel myself avenged. All is fair, you know, on the 1st of April; he's very sick, don't you understand?" she added roguishly. He thinks he's going to die and has something to confide to her first. Oh, you may depend upon it, Hugh she will lose no time. But it is after train time, Milly; she'll have to walk." "Of course she will; that's part of the joke added the beauty, Eleven miles!" Yes, eleven miles. But she won't mind. "Look here, Milly," cried Manton, very angrily, you've done a mean and cruel thing. I did not think it was in a woman to play such a contemptible trick as that." Oh, you're setting up to defend the Yankee schoolma'am, are you ?" replied Milli- cent, defiantly. "Apparently she is the queen of all hearts." I don't oare a copper about Miss Perkins," said Manton, and you know that as well as I do. But I like to see fair-play. And I mean to go and tell her that all this is a malicious joke on your part." "Gc, by all means," said Milly, oalmly, "But I think you'll find yourself too late. Don't look at me so savagely. A long walk won't hurt her, and a short disappointment will only do her good." For deliberate cruelty and conscienceless fraud," slowly uttered Manton, give me a woman." He strode fiercely out to the sawmill, where the strong throbs of steam machinery shook the building, and busied himself among his workmen, while Millie, with a yawn, betook herself to a crumpled novel and a box of somewhat stale chocolate bonbons. She had come to visit her brother at San Jean under the impression that the far Pacific coast was a very lively sort of place, with plenty of picnics, yachting parties, and Govern- ment officers to pass away the time. I To her amazement she discovered that San Jean was a wild and solitary nook, far from the luxuries of civilisation—a Sahara in the woods. Her brother's wife was eminently un- congenial to her, being a mere domestic machine. Miss Perkins, the district school-teacher, took no pains to conceal her scorn of the gay city coquette, and Millicent was drearily counting the days until her mother should send a remittauce sufficient for her to return to Chioago. She had tried her best to get up a flirtation with the foreman of the steam sawmill, and with David Belfield, the handsome young official at the railway express office, but neither of them seemed inclined to respond and Milly Manton, like Mariana in the Moated Grange," could have cried out in sheer desperation, I am weary, weary I would that I were dead!" • « • • ♦ "Sick! alone! and has something to say to me that must be said! Ob, I wonder what it can be!" said Phyllis Perkins to herself, as she sped with the long, swinging stride of a true daughter of the wilderness through the flower-enamelled woods. The sun hung low on the edges of the forest when at last she ran up the rude wooden steps of the unpainted pine building above which towered the rudely traced sign, San Jean Station." All was still. The heat of the sun bad drawn little bubbling spots of resin out of the green boards, and the sweet spring scents came up from the glen below. Phyllis knew that the next train did not stop until towards nine o'clock, so that the quiet and silence seemed not unatural. She opened the door and went in. No one was there. The door into the ticket-office was open, but the seat in front of the desk was empty. L'hyllis looked around in some perplexity. Mr. Belfield," she called. The steep mountain side sent back her voice in a muffled echo. A sense of sudden terror came upon her—a blind instinct for flight. In the same instant she thought she heard a groan, Once more she looked all around her. Surely that groan had risen out of the very depths of the earth, and there, almost at her feet, was the iron ring of a trap-door leading to the cellar below. It was the work of an instant for her to lift the door and look down into the black depths. Help! help I" moaned a feeble voice. And Phyllis saw lying there, in a cramped attitude, bound hand and foot, with his pallid face streaked with blood, the poor young express agent. Is it you, Phyllis P be murmured. Surely Providence has sent you to my aid Get a knife-a sharp stone—something—and cut these oords They are tearing their way through my flesh I And a drink of water, Phyllis, for heaven's sake I And then-then you must hang out the red light; those brutes have piled rocks on the track just this side of the sharp curve to wreck the train I It's Tuesday night and the paymaster is coming down from San Francisco with the money to pay off the railroad hands. They'll be waiting not far away for the crash, but you must go on as far up the track as you can run and signal the engineer." And leave you P" She had been hurriedly outting the cruel bonds with her pocket-knife and now helped the victim to struggle into a sitting posture. If Ob, David, you must come, too, 1 can't leave you here to perish I" He passed his hand vaguely across his fore- head. They struck me down," he said, when I would not give them the keys of the safe. I suppose they thought I was dead when they flung me down there." She brought him some water in a gourd shell. He drank eagerly, and then she bathed the cuts on his forehead and washed the clotted blood out of the fair yellow curls. Now try to stand," she said. Yes, you are better now. I'll carry the lantern, and you shall lean on me. The air is delightfully cool and dewy now and the sun has set." You are a braye girl," said he, a spasm of agony passing over his face, "and if you can be so firm I should not shrink from a little pain. Yes, I will try to walk. Don't touch my arm I think it's broken. I'm sorry that I can't carry the lantern; it's a heavy, old fashioned thing. Now, if you'll let me lean on your shoulder But you are so pale Only from loss of blood. Go on The further up the track we get the safer we are What should I have done if-- But," with a sudden perplexed expression of his coun- tenance, "1 don't think I quite understand now how you came to be here." Phyllis lifted her frank eyes to his face with innocent surprise. Your letter," she said, "Didn't you write P" "1 write ? Certainly not." But you did." She pulled the crumpled half-sheet of paper from her pocket-the letter that had sent such a joyous thrill through her heart. "See! Will you deny your own hand- writing ?" It isn't my handwriting at all. Someone bag played a joke on you-or me," he said. But, oh, what a blessed joke, for I should have died if it hadn't been for you-for you, Phyllis That night the red finger of warning pointed from the signal lantern along the track, the rain slowed up before the point of danger as reached, and the evil designs of the wreckers were frustrated. An additional man and plenty of firearms were put on at San Jean Station, and an im- promptu vigilance committee sent up from among the sawmill hands and a sturdy corps of lumbermen down on the river shore. "But wasn't it strange P" said Phyllis to Mrs. Manton. "Who do you suppose wrote the letter P" I can tell you," said Mrs. Manton. It was Millicent who wrote it." Wrote that letter ?" echoed Phyllis. Yes, Millicent Manton To hoax you. I was so angry when I heard it!" Phyllis blushed to the very roots of her hair. Yes," oried a merry, mocking voice, it was I. And Millie came out in her white serge dress, with blue forget-me-nots in her belt, looking very lovely and very inappropriate to her surroundings. Didn't 1 fool you beautifully ? And to think that you never suspected!" Phyllis drew herself up with unconscious I could hardly Suspect," said she, that dignity. a lady could be guilty of such a trick as that! But I ought to be grateful, for I was able to save Mr. Belfield's life." And she turned away and walked quietly home. There's something more to tell," said Milly, her blue eyes glistening ominously. "She has not told me all; there's something the has kept back. But I can guess it. She has not only saved his life, but she has won his heart. Well, I can't say much for his taste, that's all," She shrugged her shoulders angrily. Hugh Manton, who had come in for a leather bnokle, smiled grimly to himself. Why are you laughing P" Milly wrath- fully demanded. "Oh, for no particular cause," said Hugh. "Only it seems to me that your joke didn't work exaotly as you thought it was going to ? Exchange.
FOOTLIGHT FLASHES.
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FOOTLIGHT FLASHES. 0 By "CRIIICUS." The play's the thiny.—Ef AM r.ET: Sir Augustus Harris begins his serias of fancy dress-ba^ls at Covent Garden on the 30th instant. The first number of a bright little leaflet called "Dramatic Opinions," emanal ing from the Play- goers' Club, has just been published. The paper is to appear weekly. Miss Eliz ibstli Robins and Miss Marion Lea have undertaken to give, on Twelfth Night of the coming year, a performance of Shakspeare's delightful comedy bearing that title. The Garrick Theatre will remain dosed during the greater part of Christmas week but imme- diately aftei wards the production of Mr. Sydney Grundy's play "A Fool's Fandise" uny be ex- pected. On the 23rd instant the Sf. James's Theatre is to doe, thus bringing to a termination the some- what brief run of "Lord Anerley." The bouse will not re-open until the 30th, when Mr. Comyna Ca r's new comedy is to bo presented with a strong cast. Rehearsals of Mr. Haddon Chambers's new play, The Honourable Herbert," are progres-iog so satisfactorily at the Vaudeville that it is now practically certain the piece will be quite ready for production before Christmas. The revival of "Brighton" at the Criterion liag proved so successful that Mr. Wyndham ii again compelled to postpone his intention of producing the promised new piece, which, indeed, might more properly be spoken of as one of several now pieces lie has at present in hand. Lat-st advice.* from New York furnish details of Madame Sarah Bemhardt's appearance in a new play ( ailed Pauline Blanchard," specially written for her by MM. Darmont and Humblot. In thii the authors' object 8°ems to have been to outvie Sardou in the matter of horrors, for even La Tosca hardly presents a picture more repulsive than that offered in Pauline Blanchard." Not content with luring dramatic critics to ex- perimental matinees, the budding dramatist, has just hit upon a scheme by which he hopes tf) obtain the opinions of experts upon his work without in- curring the expense of production at a theatre. For the future the critic, accordingly, is to be in- vited to devote his Sunday evenings to the hearing ind subsequent discussion of pieces recited by the ambitious writers themselves. Mr. Frank Lindo opens the ball at St. J imes's Hall on Sunday, when he will inflict upon his audience a new drama called" A Social Victim."
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POWELL'S BALSAM OF ANISEED.—World-wide is the reputation of this old and tried remedy for Coughs, Asthma, and Bronchitis. It assuages the distressing paroxysms of asthma, promotes a free expectoration of mucus in bronchial disorders. removes the sources of throat irritation in a night cough, takes away hoarse- ness, and relieves oppression of the breathing. Powell's Balaam of Aniseed ling no proximate, and is unique as a remedy for all pulmonary and bronchial ailments. Ask for Powell's Balsam of Aniseed, with the imprint of the well-known trade-mark, Lion, Net, and Mouse," on the bottle wrapper, and see you get tt. Established 1824. Sold by Chemists and Dealers in Medicine throughout the world. In bottle?, 1^. lad. and 2s. 3d. Family bottles, lis. Laboratory. 4, Albion-place, Black- friars-road, London, E-C. liefuse spurious imita. tions. # Lc898 HOLLOWAY'S PILI.s.-The ills of life are increased tenfi ld by the mode of life so many, have to led; most especially Is this the case amonKst the toilers in our factories and huge workshops of the manufacturing districts, whose digestions become Impaired and nervous systems debilitated by the protracted confinement aim enforced deprivation of healthy out-of-door exorcise, The factory workers may almost 113 said to have diseases of their own, readily ameuable, however, to treatment if uot allowed to proceed unchecked. Holloway's Fills are the most effectual remedy ever discovered for the cure of liver and stomach cnmpln'nts, a, they act silrei), but gently, regulating the secretions with- out we*ketiu\jj its nerves or interfering with. the daily work L5005
FUNNIOSITIES.
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FUNNIOSITIES. Language for "Turtle Doves"—"Pigeon 11 t, English." Some men are born great and grow smaller every day of their lives. "1 know two tunes; one is Old Hundred and the other isn't. I always sing the latter." Unless one is partial to sheets of water, one should always avoid the bed of a river. The butcher may meat a man daily for years without knowing him, but the man will have to pay cash. I'owlandjFlill once fyiahed a charity sermon by requesting all persons who were in debt not to place anything in the plate. Wool: Do you know anything about the doctrine of election ? Van Pert Only in a general way-vote early and often. Lillie Oh, Minnie, I have stuffed a pillow full of Cholly'a love letters. Minnie: What a soft pillow it must make. You've been sadly taken in," as the sym- pathetic slavey observed to the water rate before handing it to her impecunious master. A lady's favourite dog having bitten a piece out of a male visitor's leg, the lady said: "Poor, dear little creature, I hope it will not make him sick." Keeper to sportsman (who has missed everything all day) If them 'ere rabbits was a yard longer behind, you'd be after makin' a. fine bag, sir. Nayther.—Mr. Ilogan (after hammering on the door for five minutes) Is it dead or alive ye are? Mr. Grogan (within): Nayther i I'm shlapin, Mr. Mugg: Beautiful view, isn't it, Miss Sharpe ? Miss B. (gazing at him): I can't say 1 care for such an expanse of plain scenery, Mr. Mugg. Friend: How's your son getting on, Janks ? I hops he's grown up a credit, to the family. J.: Yes; he has, the young rascal. He gets credit everywhere. A query for students of Macaulay Would it be right to term the confidence trick, as practised in the days of the Csesars, a Lay of Ancient Rome r" Mr. Brown (burrowing in a bureau drawer): I never can find anything I want in this house. Mrs. Brown: Yes, you can, dear. You can always find something to growl about. Assuming the population of the world, according to the latest estimates, to be aboti'. 1,450,000,000, it is estimated that 1,050,000,000 are non-Christians, and, of course, 400,000,000 only are Christians. It is hardly worth while to dread a thunder- storm, as there is only about one chance in a million that a person will die from a light- ning stroke-which is doubtless the most in- stantaneous and painless of all causes of death. A philological statistician calculates that in the vear 2000 there will be 1,700,000,000 people who speak JKngliab, and that the other European languages will be spoken by only 500,000,000. If a division of the real estate of the globe was made each one would only have a small lot. Some one has figured it out that, taking the whole land surface of the globe into consi- deration, there is, on an average, 2acres to each person. Oilicer, Royal Irish Why were you late in returning to barracks last night, Private Atkins ? t'rivate Atkins Train from London was very late, sir. Officer Very good. Next time the thrain's late, take care y' come by an earlier one. Something in a Name.-Ouest: flow's this ? A pound a day Stopped here a year ago and paid only half that much. Proprie- tor Just so. Then it was the M'Ginnis Tavern; now it's the Hotel M'-Ginnis. A newspaper editor says:—We have re- ceived a notice of marriage for insertion to which was appended the original announce- ment, Sweethearts at a distance will please accept this intimation.' You have omitted one item," said a de- parting guest to the landlord. What's that?" asked mine host. "The bookkeeper said good morning to me to-day, and you've forgotten to charge for it." A young Prince of the House of Monaco was asked why he had married a rich old woman. "Mafoi," was the gay young Prince's reply, what poor fellow, in a hurry to get a bank-note cashed, troubles himself to look at the date of it." Why do you call those chess complica- tions, White to move and mate in three moves problems ? Because they are diffi- cult to solve. Some are pretty old, but hard nuts to crack all the same," ".Then why not call them chessnuts ? Franklin I have always bad an idea that after a couple had been married for some time that even their thoughts become, to a certain degree, identical. Am I right, Peck ? Mr. N. Peck: Guess you are. About now my wife is thinking over what she'll say to me for coming home late, And so am J. Old lady Doctor, do you think there is anything the matter with my lungs ? Physi- cian (after a careful examination) I find, madam, that your lungs are in a normal con- dition. Old lady (with a tsigh of resigna- tion) And for about how long can [ expect to live with them in that condition ? Lord Sandwich said: "When I was in Paris I had a dancing master. When I left him I offered him my services in London." Then," said the man bowing, I would take it as a particular favour if your lordship would never tell anyone of whom you learned to dance." The ways of auctioneers in different parts of the world vary greatly. In England and America the seller bears the expense of the sale, but in France the puroiraaer bears the cost, 5 per cent being added ifco his purchase. In Holland it is still worse, the buyer being required to pay 10 per mmt. additional for the expense of the sale. Gainsborough once took part in a law suit, and when in the witness-box rhe happened to speak of the "painter's eye" in a professional sense, the counsel for the other side, wanting to:confuse him, said: And, pray what do you mean by the painter's eye ? "Why," answered Gainsborough, it is to an artist what a lawyer's tongue is to him." At a wedding recently the officiating olergy- 9 man having concluded the marriage service, gave the young couple a suitable address. He had not, however, prooeeded far in his dis- course when the bridegroom, going up to the verger, whispered in his ear, Tell your guv'nor to out it short; I've got the oab by the hour I" A blind fiddler was plaving at a wedding party in a roral district, lie kept the dancers well and happily at work, and so admirably did be handle the bow that he excited the wonder of a musician who was among the guests. At the oonclusion of one of the dances the musical visitor stopped before the performer, and said, I am delighted with your playing, which to me is all the more wonderful because you cannot see. Tell me, how do you manage to remember the tunes and variations ? Do you play by the ear, or how p" "Well, sir, to tell you the honest truth, I have never made a contraot for so long a period as to play by the year. I generally play bv the niarWt."