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UP AND DOWN THE COAST. ......r'J"'...i"....",-"-,",--,",-,-"""""""-"",-""-"",,,,-,-""V"-,",-,,,-,,,,-,,",------_........-_...._-_........--.---'-...............-....."-'-'-........-"-'


UP AND DOWN THE COAST. .r'J"i" "V" LOAFERS. In every town there are loafers who seldom work, but who always seem able to obtain drink. There are ragged loafers, out at knees and elbows, who hang about bridges, street-comers, railway stations, and stable yards, and ask passers-by if they have such a thing as a penny about them and there are respectable loafers-honorary mem- bers of the thirsty club—who are very particular about the cut of their clothes, and always speak of themselves as gentlemen These loafers use a good deal of their spare time in discussing public men and public events, and in their trot estimation are keen analysts of times and cha- racters. They are great wags, too. Over a glass of beer, they cast out their ghostly jokes, and laugh at them like gentlemen. They are very particular never to forget that they are gentlemen, and, of course, whatever they do they do like gentlemen. They swear and lie, and forget to pay de:;ts, but they never cease to be gentlemen Nothing is more interesting than to sit unknown and silent among a lot of these loafers, when they are "in funds," and have got the chill taken off. What ability they possess With what ease they settle the destinies of empires. How consummately they un- ra,-el the mysteries of life. Cabinets are reckoned up like sums in simple addition. The deep laid schemes of Premiers and Generals are seen through as easily as the holes in a ladder. Doctors without patients give Dr. Gull his quietus; lawyers without clients dispose of Lord Chancellors, and decide off-hand the nicest points of law; captains without ships manoeuvre fleets and win battles officers without commissions lead armies and de- cide campaigns tradesmen who never could earn a living at the businesses they were trained to make vast fortunes in trades they do not understand. Untrammelled by facts the loafer settles everything to his own great satisfaction. From his half-drunken and Imaginary attitude he looks down on poor hard working humanity as demn'd ungentlemenly, don't you know." Young men anxious to see what has been mis-named "life," sometimes fall into the hands of these loafers. Fortunately the mockery is so obvious—the shams are so distinctly labelled that only the very greenest are deceived. The loafers are so very particular to keep in mind they are gentlemen that when one of their number happens to get found out, which is deemed to be a most ungentle- manly proceeding, they cut him forthwith. Wrong- doing they delight in, but to be caught and punished is intolerable. MODEL MEMBERS. There is a Board of Guardians in Merionethshire which has a very high rate of pauperism. One of the members of that Board makes speeches about the evil consequences of out-relief. He is, in fact, very indignant the Board does not reduce the rate of pauperism, which he says, and says with truth, is excessive. Of course everybody knows that out-relief can only be checked by careful attention to the relief lists, but as soon as these lists are produced, and very often before, this member gets up and takes his departure! In the newspapers he appears very like a useful Guardian, but he is—a sham. A SUGGESTION. I have been informed on good authority that the drain- age of the flats at Aberystwyth has dried a spring at Llan- badarn, and is also drying up Simon's Well. What shall be done with Simon's Well after it is dried up, I cannot imagine, unless we convert it into a garden, and grow greens on it. MORE LIGHT. Aberdovey is as nice a place as there is on the coast, and in the matter of brass bands need not fear any compe- titor in Merionethire. It is not every town that owns more brass bands than lamps. Perhaps Aberdovey is the only town in the United Kingdom that boasts of two efficient brass bands and not one public lamp. Music is a humanizing thing, but light is not to be altogether despised, and with all proper humility I venture to suggest a compromise between light and music. Instead of two bands and no lamps let there be one lamp and one band. Will the members of the Local Board consider this proposal? There is another matter. Aberdovey can- not prosper as long as the hotel is empty. Every water- ing place must have a large hotel for a certain class of peopla. This hotel may land its proprietor with great regularity in the bankruptcy court; but, no matter, one of the indispensable requisites of a watering place is a large hotel. If it keeps the proprietor well, if the pro- prietor has to keep it, and the public have to keep the pro- prietor, still well, but not so well. HOPEFUL SIGNS. The country everywhere "with verdure clad is look- ing its best. The prospects of a bountiful harvest of use- ful and beautiful gifts are brighter than for many years past. Flowers are a glorious crop already. The lanes are full of the scent of hawthorn blossom. The fields are like jewels set in green, and gold. The mountains are each aseparateglory,and whoshall describe the woods? Nowisthe time for weary men to go into quiet places and give them- selves time to think. There is a meaning in this tangle of life, and never is that meaning made clearer than in quiet moments when irritating forces are removed. "To know how beautiful this world can be lanes, woods, and iields should be visited now. Once a mau learns how beautiful this world can be," it can never again be anything but beautiful to him as long as he lives. Bountiful harvests will bring gladness and plenty to thousands of homes where gladness and plenty are not frequent guests. Now is the time of rich promise to be fulfilled in autumn let us hope. A CONVERSATION. Tradesman—Really, sir, you are the thirteenth com- mercial traveller I have seen in my shop to-day. Commercial—I am sorry to hear that. Did you give any of them an order ? Tradesman—No, I certainly did not. There were eight of your sort here yesterday, and Commercial—There are six more at the hotel. We tossed odd man out" who should come first. Tradesman-Will you kindly tell the other six they might as well not come here. Commercial-Can't you give me an order? (Palls a sample of the goods he travels in out of his pocket.) Just a line, you know, if it is ever so little. Tradesman—Trade is bad. People have no money. Commercial—It is bad. I never saw anything like it, and the road is swarming with boy travellers. I expect to see the next lot in permabulators, accompanied by their nurses. Tradesman—I really cannot buy, Mister. It's no use, indeed. What do you ask for that (pointing to sample). Commercial—(Brightens up, and mentions a price which he thinks remarkably low)—You cannot do better than that, I am sure. If it were not for the wretched state of trade, you would have to pay about double the price I have asked you. Tradesman (walking to one of his shelves)—See here, I will sell you as much of the article you are offering, only a better sample, at lower prices than you ask. Commercial (examining article)—Do you mean it. Tradesman—I do. (Walks to his invoice file, which he shows. ) Commercial-Good day, sir. (Pockets his sample and disappears.) The Coast. PERRY WrSKLE.















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