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THE COURT. -----

POLITICAL GOSSIP. --

LITERATURE AND THE ARTS. -

MOTIVE POWER IN A NEW SHAPE.

A FRIGHTFUL ASSAULT.

ASSASSINATION OF PRINOE ALFRED…

EXTRACTS FROM " PUNCH " &…

Railway Lines for Music.

From our Neuralgic Contributor.…

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From our Neuralgic Contributor. BrE,-So you want comic copy do you ? Well! you won't get any from me, I fancy, unless you likt some- I thing of this sort. Why is a bad tooth geierally E called a hollow one P—Because it makes you aolloa. Or I'll send yon a parody, entitled "Begone, dull £ Caries." <; No! I sternly refuse to write while suffering ii this way. Do you know what neuralgia is like P No not you sitting in your comfortable arm-chair in your dfioe. Well, then, I will tell you. It is as if one particular hollow tooth in yonr head were a small furnithed apartment let to a restless lodger, who keeps on let- ting up, pushing his chair back, ..turning round tlree times, and then sitting down again, and driving tin taolzo into (jilt) carpet. After that I suppose you won't want any comic o<py from me, and if you do, you won't got it.—Yours, OLD RALGIA. A MARGATE MARTYR. —Because your trip didnt agree with yon, you need not call on us to throw ID all the nautical poetry that was ever written. Beside the song is "What are the wild waves saying?" no, "playing," so that the allusion to pitch and toss wai not intended. ROMANTIC. composed by Moon light" want freedom. As that respectable female, Mrs. B- but no! we will respect the privacy oi domestic life-as Mrs. B. would say, You've got the cramp in your lines along o' sitting out in a damp evening!" GRUMPY is very angry because we haven't inserted the contributions he has sent us, and won't transmit him large sums of money for them. If he will kindly send us his address, we will take care to avoid the street. A YOUNG HOUSEKEEPER. domestic servant generally requires a month's notice, but you can turn off your gas without any warning. GROWLER complains that the parish authorities or somebody" have laid down gravel to mend the road in front of his house, and the noise is insuffer- able. Well, he had better begin to remove it, and he will find the parish will take it up sharply. A WETERAN says the temperance people are bother- ing him eternally and tea-urnally to take the pledge, because he is so, fond of grog that he often sees du piicates. He had better tell them to pledge him in a foaming cup of wine." INGENIOUS ICHTHYOLOGICAL DISCOVERY. are more than pleased to have it in our exclusive power to state—and the statement will probably allay the fears of many an over-excited, fervid member of the Church-that the much-talked of and much- dreaded Seal of Confession turns out, after all, to be no other than that harmless creature known to all showmen, such as Barnum and the like, as The Talking Fish." GAMMON, IF TRUE. —By accounts from Hampshire 1 we learn that flitches of bacon in that porciferous county now fetch, wholesale, Is. per pound, and that a breeder in the New Forest last week refused a guinea t each for a litter of pigs seven weeks old. It may well be feared, as it is, that bacon in the South of England will soon be 2s. a pound for what can you expect j but preoious bacon when Forest pigs of seven weeks old are guinea-pigs P THE WORST CON. OF THE SEASON. —When you dine with your friend, and you both have Harvey's j Sauce, why is it equivalent to your riding Pillion { with him ? Because he'd Harvey's Sauce (halve his horse) with you. QUITE CONTRARIWISE. —We are told that "like cures like." We wish our clever homoeopaths would invent a much more valuable system to society by which dislikes should cure dislikes." AN ACUTE ANGLER. —The Judicious Hooker. POLITICO-GEOGRAPHICAL. — Members of the Go- vernment say they prefer the Bark of Ben-out to the Bight of Ben-in. A CON. GUN- DP.UM the difference between a soldier who's served his ammunition and a soldier who's served his country P The first'II discharge his musket, the second must-get his discharge 4

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FRACAS IN THE DUBLIN EXHIBITION.

OUR MISCELLANY. -+-

SUICIDE OF A YOUNG WOMAN aT…

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