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1 THOUGHTLESS HUSBANDS AND…

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1 THOUGHTLESS HUSBANDS AND NEGLECTED WIVES. A Neglected Wife," in a letter to the Daily Tele- graph, thus sums up her complaints against her k^Bmvlry fond of reading the articles in The ffd- graph, and I want yon to favour me by giving a w»d yiit to husbands. I have been marnedonly a M«e [eU least lore; enoutrh to have Ljii jove him, if he you how much I loved my ^biiid, a m0 wjves ought would only be a little more kind. hln and when he to submit to their husbands In every morning, keeping comes home at one or two ™ it»g quite right, and me waiting tea till eight or nine,. he y ,f they love each that all married men do so. But X a y &11 day t0 some other. Yesterday 'Sunday) he we to whom he was friend's house, where resides a y°!"g t come home till past once engaged to be married, and d hoWiiegot away th mid right. He said he did not ^ow^^ j know Jf the young lady played and he would not say and had not ceased to love ma a^og breaking my heart I feel do these things, which are nearly brea^ t i feei so unhappy, and I have no ^ite to you, feelinVa° confide in. So I L m0 troublesome, and that vrm sured ihat yon will not think me^ hustonri.'a^ Will tlinm <?ut someI h <jr flnlj nnthinVingly ciniduml ot.hf ra. too, who tnong"^°V'gara it nnf. ifo little "lK a come rest, This letter as may be readily imagined, evoked many others on the same subject, from which we have selected the following. For many years I P^Ye read your paper daily, and have noticed the invariable fairness of your remarks but I have never read an article more just, kind, and I hope calcu- lated to do more good, than the one on a "ANeglected Wifp." Scolding wives, extravagant wives, in fact, women's weaknesses in every shape and form, are constantly held up to ridicule and reproach in the papers. Very few men would have had the fairness to admit there is a reverse side to the picture, y°u °ave now done. "Women are guilty of many follies, have weaknesses without number doubtless, but their hearts are very tender and easilv bruised by unkindness, or select from those they love. C )uld any eloquence of yours teach those men who have good wives to remember how limited are women's opportunities for enjoyment without their husbands, and also to realise how the thought might sting that wife who, waiting up hourafter hourforherhusband when he is enjoying himself away from her! "He has had all my youth and lreshness; I have helped him with my brain, onward to success I have saved to get him comforts, and hidden petty difficulties from him that his mind might have ease; ani now I am getting passle, my spirits dulled by the wear and tear of life's troubles on the system, I am over- looked, cast aside for every fresh attraction." I have a hus- band who by nature is kindhearted, and who would be horrified at the bare idea of striking me with his fist, yet who lashes me more severely than with any whip I am approach- ing thirty, and there are younger and fairer women now. V handsome, of a?reeab!e manners, and my own age, but, of course, looks younger. Five years ago he could not bear to spend an evening away from home; Bince then my diaries !record that it is seldom before two a m. he comes in. He does not mean to be unki; d, but billiard tables are increas- ing in number very rapidly. He goes for one game and stays longer. Then, if he wins, he must give So-and-so his revenge another night. Therefore, with first one attrac- tion and another, time passes on, and I spend my evenings, after the children are in bed, alone. Friends say, "Why sit up? Go to bed." Yes, it is easy to do that. But will the dull, aching heart aumit of sleep ?—Yours, &c. A WIFE AND A MOTHER. Tho letter of "A Neglected Wife" has awakened a veiy a.ad echo in my < wn heart. 1, too. love my husband very dea.T'y> Erid have the bitter sorrow of knowirg that be cares noth-'ng for me. We have met with a reverse of cir- cumstanoes, and I have done with the barest necessaries that he might have at least some of those comforts to wh'eh he has been acc*.«tomed. I keep his books, and I try to be to him all that a good and loving wife can be, and yet he has not scrupled in his moments of passion to raise his hand against me. I, too, have known what it was for my husband to pay that attention to others which should have been de- voted to his wife, and 1 have also known the bitter agony of being told bv my husband that he never loved me, but that his whole affection was and is given to this day to a lady to whem hewaseugtged years ago. Let it comfort A Neg- lected Wife" to know that there are far more miserable ibeings in the word than herself. Yoiirs, <X:c ANOTHER NEGLECTED WIFE. WUI you permit a few words of advice to "A Neg- lected Wife,' from a wife of more than thirty years, and the mother of married daughters. Do not hope for a complete and constant return of) our affection. Home is not nearly so important to your husband as to yourself. It is wise to lace early the certainty that you must find the greater part of your own happiness f. r yourself. If you hate chil- dren they will occupy your affecticns, perhaps for life. Never 4. elt up for your husband, and never inquire where he has been if he teiis unasked make no angry remark, but, if pos- sible, tell him )our occupations in his absence, as co' lly and as easily as you can, remembering you are engaeed to ttand by his side and not behind him. Many a husband grows in- <lifferet:t. becauso his wife neglects her duty to herself, lest she should be called selfish. If you have had a good educa- tion, cultivate some special part of it which needs no home ■encouragement—history, social Etnd political, drawing and painting; teach yourself some modern language, singing, gardening, even in flower-pots; visiting the sick and poor, Mot as a member of any church or society, but for yourself. Make it a duty to yourself to give a fixed time daily to your- S»TO»ne' a y°n wi''l you gradually become indifferent w wUat will be otherwise a fearful shadow on all your T»i^re aDd *utnre life and. should j on be happy enough to «n it f?i?ny p jrt of y°nr husband's affection, YOU will rejoice AN U IUUJ, and value it at its true worth.—Yours, &e., H. H. you w°uld write a few words stra.ght a„ vhe hearts of husbands who, either by thought- lessness indifference, or neglect, devote many a loving wife Ao a life of unliappiness; but I dared nnt (might seem to yon only the discontented cry of a woman A toving wife will e.idure po much in silence llJd Jnrdt thoughtless or contemptuous coldness, may, and do some' times make her heart rise in momentary rebellion; but she will never complain to relations—she will to the 'very last uphold her husband, and wish him to stand well in the sight of all. ft is, then, only through a public medium that good •can be done us. We must honour and obey our husbands-yes, indeed, that Is a pleasure to a wife. She will think no sacrifice too great for JÜs happiness she will fling herself wholly and entirely into the gulf of his necessities," and only ask for a little love, a little consideration, in return. Believe me, you can much good by a few words for wives who are linked, not to brutes who would raise their hands against a woman, or -who would act with systematic cruelty, but only to men who forget to be kind-for;,cet to be coiirteoue-foreet to show the love they feel perhaps.—Yours, &o., ONLY A WOMAN. At the time of my marriaee I occupied a very humble position in life; and, although possessing no very great busines s qualifications, J had some small amount of pluck, and starved with a determination to push onward, and have one so vvith a reasonable share of success, and now occupy, for a working man, a very good position, with an income sufficient to procure all the comforts that can be wished for. But, in coi'<«equ.;nce of my wife's ideas being very far in advance of my station in life, and, as a result, having acquainted with people having double and treble myfcco *he has become (iUs&tisfled with her bome; an«»as •entertain her friend* in a manner If' 3ife she leads ma I have not the ekill to de crlOQ out it is som^thin" awful to contemplate. Although having but a «mafi family, this constant strwning to keep up false ap- pearances has almost beggared me. Although my income is ■considerably aboye the lowest amount liable to taxatien, I am positively in a worse position than many lower-class workmen. ( I am always received with a gloomy countenance and short snappish speech. Always tired, and often unwell, there is no rest or peace at home. My wants are neglected, and re- monstrances treated with defiance. In the midst of all my misery I have never, liita the husband of your first unhappy wife, deserted my home for private visiting or public amuse- ».' confldently believe that more misery is caused by vain, thoughtless women than by neglectful husbands in the lower and Hpper middle classes. In most cases where fami- lies live above their means, the yanitv of the wife is the cause; and woe to the wretchod husband who dares remon- strate !—Yours, &c., A BROKEN-SPIRITED HUSBAND. A great deal is written and said about "neglected WtTea." Have not our dear husbands quite as much, or even more, .to complain of than we have ? They take us as we are, to work for, and they do work hard for our comforts and en j oyments. They are responsible for all our former debts if we have any and how many of them, after making our homes pretty and comfortable, as far as lies in their power, have to put up with ill temper. ill health, bad dinners, weak tea, and dislike to Bmoking I Depend ths husbands are as good as the wivea-I know mine is; and whenever we -quarrel it js I who provoke, and my dear husband, has ever a kind word and a levftig smile. We wives will worry about little things; we wives 40 not study our husbands enougit; we wives fancy we want more money, more change, more devotion than even the best &nd most devoted of husbands can give Let us alter, and th«re will be very few neg- iace^-YourV &c.. m°r° happy homes bright A WIFE WHO SEES THINGS IN A JRiqht LIGHT. Aly opinion Is, as a wife of many years' standing, that tttfie little comforts of a husband were more studied at nOIRe he would feel much less inclined to go elsewhere to seek them. Of course there are exceptions, as some men are Tnoraify bad but the generaltty of them. I feel convinced, are not <o. any more than the women. Let a woman only be agrees.ble to her own husband as she is to others, and shn TfiU always find him anxious to remain at home, rather th leave her for others that he does not in reality care ne least about. The first years of a married life are always *he most difftelilt to get over; but be blind to some faults, -!o*^n iIour husband find a cheerful, happy home and a iiv t w.lle> and he will never be wishful to leave it or her. •elpfttti waa a'waJ*! that my husband should find nothing _v"~ere that he could not have at home, and it succeeded. XUUTT(F <fcc., AN Experienced WIFE AND MOTHER. J, have iWad with a feeling of deep interest the various it K8 'Jat-have appeared in your columns on "Thoughtless and jOgiected Wives." As a wife o;. b^t four years' ?' *?ay allowed to express a few opinions ,on the whi^h caDnot thinking that much of the negieet of Vhrti Jar-in?.8 comPla'fJ-and husbands too—is occasioned by hands "g apprecia.t4,cu of and sympathy with their hus- night alter ntoht 1 be,iev0> drjven from his home derail RR hf to' .exactly oy his wife's unkindness, but tm common tl8 °ccupa&onB and hers have nothing t^TCd Wou.ld iizten with interest if hi W would witwSt e 8<ibje.ctc fit converse on which i^sttes me«nP^f.^e{eDga8e- Instep ,pf making him feel Wfato haTO Wm r aVd comfort te Iier, and that she wou him tboth body andmind aiie? the fatigue and tc ^e„d^.shefc^aHy by her indifferenoe di-es him from he. ■ K'eets him with a volley oi re- proaches this is, in many homes, the cause of; eBtrangemei, »Witw^en husband an4 wife; and not only •his, but I havb' loving husbands wounded and degraded »Llh! Wlfe'4 tr, his friends. Should he urex- ot of y ^ri Tina. to dinner or i?a,instead a hea»n^ welcome from his wife, thete is in in the „ er a positive courtesy and kindness, been Presence.. why ? iicrely because she has lose ail Jt.Ijttle out of her v "UcIi tu'iinKa make a husband as to choose hence in the won he has BO highly honoured can we woru)l^r. above all other^ v g^fce his home and how look forenjoym In8t«»d of seeki he should that the e>ewhere? I do Wish even to suggest but I believe thatS, Wife" is one of fciT)d of women and hardened, n^°s^en, unless they depraved Those neglected won over by love ftu^ sympathy. «'zenhyr-iuPe(i8prite» have never tr* what this nnon it we shall have n? ^0> them try now, depend lewer Neglel-ted Wives "^5v ^0,1shtful HuBbanu8 'and &C., JUSTICZ?.- J have been married now aom t, Rifled to give my oplninn^ „ years, aud am there- iSa wK» «4 Bmb-rtJiSjSJajif of one as the other, I least doubt* ?n«fr\hink that the greatest cause of this negieet ig And of .en commences from the most, trivial occurrences bntat last assumes the mastery °vff tdfll8rc;,eUon, and Caise?ul to say and do things which obilite!p P«ot for each other ana thus kill love, for without re p ioye canaot exigt' How often do we find trifling things, doors would be passed over without comment, uPBe, *"Qt|y of ht.r.}^ which the slightest control of tongue and temper wouid prevented Does it not behove everyone oth man and "ife, to exercise this control? And I maintain tnat, if e*er- "C. 8^d, there would be far less neglected wivt i, Yours, &c., AN experienced hua&AISD. It "vi]3g read the letters in your paper, referring to 'cted husbands and wives, I beg to say, I think p P for** Dahke troubles for themselve?. I have now been a wi year and nine months, and can only say, it hits been there k "'P'eat time of my life. I have no family, therefore event* ^nld be more excuss for my husband spending thinti having nothing to amuse him. I cannot help inaitA KK w'fe'3 fault if she does not contrive to has Ko 4.^ '^hand's home comfortable and happy alter he will «i 8 all day for her. Many of my acquaintances nnf auo\ v their husbands to smoke in the house. I can- miaia fry laying that I think the men are quite right in going where they are allowed that luxury. My husband always spends his evenings at home with me, smoking and reading tho pai*T.—lr.-maln, yours truly, ONE WHO WOULD NOT BE UNMARRIED FOR WORLDS. I will not cease to sympathise with the "Tender Mother," the Devoted Wife," or the "Neglected Wife," but all I ask is just or e kind word for that poor, sad, forlorn, lonely cre-tturf The Widow." Now, to you I, for one appeal We want your advice—your guidance. We have the rich widow—sy, and the poor wltow; we have the blue-stockiog widow and the namby-pamby ditto j we hfive the bonnie wee, sprightly widow, and we have the flat- footed frumpy widow—the black-ejed, the blue-eyed, the loving-eyed and, yes, the artful, cunning-eyed widow. All have their own particular charm, or vice versa; but still they are and must be styled, unhappy widows. They did love they were devoted, ever fond, ever faith- ful hut now, sad, desolate, forlorn. Will you not, can you not, be the grand philanthropist of the day, and conceive some good, wholesome scheme for setting these lonely ones once more' in the hemisphere so peculiarly their own ? It strikes me that it Í3 in your province to tell us what we ought to do. Once in Sour years-that dear delicious leap year—I am toll we are allowed the privilege of selection. Yet, then we may ask for the love, the pro- tection-may I say the fond adoration ?-of the nobler sex; but whp.t do we get in return for our long cooped-up courage? Nothing but a quiet No." and a red petticoat (a silk one). nell, tt J'bil pbttiuuab is yuuil lu i!y wiiy | but wlmi Willit HS U'lllll, BlunMily, it)ge, and happiness.—llavinu once-oh, yes, truly once-known its bliss, don't think us very wicked if we say we'll try it again only alloir us tho. chance —Find a corner for this lament,, and you will oblige yours truly ONE OF THE KOKLORNS. I venture to make a practical suggestion, which, if it were acted on, would tend, perhaps in no slight degree, to lessen the number of "Neglected Wives"— and "Neglected Hus- bands," for there are suchfilso. Letthehusbandbe*'though?- ful" tnou^i, from the earliest period of his married life, to keep his mother-in-law at an affectionate but respectful distance; not to allow her to have too close and constant personal intercourse with his wife. And I would say the same thing with regard to his unmarried sister-in-law, if that sister-in-law happens to be an elder sister to his wife— especially if swe happens, through disappointment of ad- vancing years, to be losing the probable chance of forming ctAtjugal ties herself and, still more especially, both with regard to his mother-in-law and sister-in-law, if they happen to be ladies who claim to be strong-minded and who go in warmly for the independence and rights of women. Such an influence allowed to come in constant contact with the wife, especially if she be of a more plastic nature, and without the most consummate tact and judgment to counteract it, it is apt to act as the thin end of the wedge, disturbing the absolute unity which ought to be entire and inseparable between her husband and herself. Other ears. other hearts are open to her unconsciously she is rendered leas wholly dependent upon his. In the little differences which will arise between the best regulated couples she gets her mother's and sister's sympathy they take her part as against her husband's; the husband feels that there is a cloud, which, at first no bigger than a man's hand, has yet risen over the sunshine of his home; he becomes, however, slightly, touchy and restrained. Other differences arise they magnify as they multiply. The mother and sister no longer sympathise or, rather, they do more-they either commiserate "poor dear Mary," who stung by their pity, settles down angrily or sullenly into the notion that she is ill-used, or they advise her to resist; and resistance means—what ? A henpecked husband, or a house divided against itself-and such a house cannot stand it falls, and amid its ruin wanders either a neglected or forsaken husband or wife. When domes1 is differences have become chronic, it is often hard to say whe, e any one quarrel has begun; but I think that the first outlet to the waters of strife miy often be traced back to such an unwholesome influence as I have alludcd to heing allowed to interfere with, till it take the place of, that influence which eveiy husband ought to have and exercise ovrr his wife, and which it ought to be the honour of the wife, and not a thinx unworthy of her, to acknowledge as supreme. Let the young husband, then beware of bting in too close quarters with his mother-in-law and lethim cherish affectionately, but at a distance from himself and wife, any e'der and strong-minded "Sister Anne."—I am, sir, yours, &u. F. The discussion now proms: on in your paper is being read with a great deal of interest, not only by the married folk, but also by those who have themselves some hope of entering upon the blessed (?) state of matrimony. Some wives that I know, when their husbands come home in the evening, immediately commence asking numerous irritating questions relative to business, and then annoy them by detailing all she little domestic affairs and grievances that have happened curing -the day-how Sarah was an hour longer than she ought to have been sweeping the dining-room, and how cook was in a bad temper, and had been rather impertinent and various other trifle* that cannot interest a man. Let her not forget that no matter how worried she may have been during the day he also has been much perplexed, and comes home to find rest. If she thinks continually of this she will en- deavour to meet him always with a cheerful countenance and loving worns; then, when women learn to do this we shall have very few complaints from neglected wives." But a word or two to thoughtless husbands When your wives thus study > ou, do not take it altogether as a matter of course, but show them-as you can in hundreds of ways-that you are grateful, and that you fully appreciate their for- bearance. lUchter says, "That love requires not so much proofs as expressions of love." It would be well if both hus- bands and wives would think of this maxim.-I am, Sir yours, &c., PETITE. I am, very hopeful of the good that will come out of all this wordy war, and beg to add my mite of experience of twelve years of married life. Now, alas I am without the happiness, but I can look back to much of solid comfort, and truly believe that matters would have been much better if we had seen ourselves as itheas see us." The vast majority of people marry on slight knowledge of each other; they c. have not, nor can they create, the constant opportunity of being in each other's society, by which means the knowledge of character and mutual fitness maybe ascertained. There must be a similarity of thought or a happy spirit of ac- commodation." This is the basis of all future comfort, between two classes as wide apart as the poles, the re- ligious and the non-religious wcrld. The former will ac- commodate from principle^ the latter from motives of expediency; the first will always be, the litter seem to be. I, as a medical man, see plenty of both classes. I feel that I shall be quite safe, in a future choice, if I select a woman, who from girlhood to maturity has been always the same type of character, known by all to be such. My avocations would deny me the constant opportunities others have, although it may lurni-sh me with special facilities for knowledge of character; but I shall be quite content to trust my happiness and my children's to this common groundwork of action, without which I could not respect the woman, nor would she understand me. Husband and wife must be all to each other. Tneir ta.%tea may be dis similar, but there must be endurance of each other's weak- nesses. It is bad policy to shelve a husband's hobby," to snub him to her female" advisers "—a class that ought to be shut out of every home—and to m^be him feel uncomfortable at her want of good breeding or taste. If a woman, like the drowning tailor's wife, will cry "Scissors" as long as she has reath, let her but to husbands that are to come. to those in existence, to the candidate wives or widows, I will say real love will find out the approach to the most stubborn heart • and If religious life comes after marriage, you have «L nower sure to win sooner or lafer—the source of prayer— and th" exhibition on your own part of a life, different it may be to the past, but consistent with the new life you have re- ceived.—Yours, &c., VIATOR. Having fulfilled the three phases of womanhood as wife, mother, and, alas widow, I can speak from the ful- ness of a woman's nature to the hearts of my young sisters, and bid them be of good cheer and go on to meet the shadowy future of wifedom without fear and with a brave heart." Can it be that the women of England, who possess the happy privilege of choosing their husbands, are so weak, so untit for the post of a wife, as to take to wailing in the public papers over their private woes, thereby disclosing their,own unfitness to he the companion of a man ? It has been said by a cynic that "man is the natural foe of a woman. Truly, there might be some excuse for his becoming so when he finds the woman whom he has chosen as his "companion for life" guilty of the treachery of exposing the misery of his home to the public. Let our "girls" know early how to help in making home" happy. Parents should cultivate the special gifts of their daughters, looking on into the future, when Euch "hived honey" may prove sweet and supporting in time of need. It is said, A) en, as a rule, are selfish. Be it so. Pelf-abnegation in a woman may be a virtue, where in a man it might be deemed a weakness. It seems to me that, if sisters would study their brothers in the home-life, it might help them to the better understanding of the value of feminine influence over the masculine nature. Men require not so much the comforts < f a home as its brightness. '-L'hey return from the external life—weary if they work, bored if idle. Let them find affection and cheerfulness to greet them on the threshold, and then "home "will be to either brother or husband all that the sweet English word is meant to express. A wife must study find guide the idiosyncrasies of the husband she has given herself to. This is not weak- ness, but strength.-Youfs &a., C. J. M. R. As a sympathiser with neglected husbands, I would Prefer an alteration of yonr title to Neglected Husbands and Thoughtless Wives." I am sure there are many who will agree with me in this particular; for how many are there, hard-working, earnest, and active business men, up early and late in order to provide for and raise their wives and families to a higher position in life, when he returns to his home after the labours of the day-perhaps after some misfortune or unforeseen loss in trade, things not having succeeded accord- ing to his expectatIOns-finds himself rather irritable and in- disposed, which acts as a natural consequence of disappoint- ment, instead of meeting with cordial sympathy and kind- ness from the partner of his life, is exposed to sharp criticisms on his so-called carelessness, and why did not you do so and so ? —the consequence of which is, unless the hu*band is one in a BhaJP display of anger and turmoil, and through le^H om °;1 tl,ePart of the wife I hope tbought- .'l1 glv? a nere attention to their husbands' nortant oM^tatPhP1?etiS' remembtI";ng that it was for this im- portant oh] ct that they were first created. And may this discussion lead many wives, and young ladies also, to emulate those virtues of which the wise man speaks when he says j, a virtuous and wise woman is rather to be chosen than thousands of gold and silver," is the earnest desire of W. P. H. I have been much interested in reading the corre- spondence about "Neglected Wives. Not .one of your cor- respondents appear to give what I consider the true reasons of matrimonial unhapplness. I believe them to be simply these. In nine cases out of ten, courtship ends at the altar or, in other words, the same care is not taken to please or study each other after marriage as before. What girl thinks of going out if she expects her lover ? Does she allow him to fllJd her in slovenly attire, sitting fuming and grumbling over petty troubles ? Do they not generally make the best of themselves, and, if they have been in trouble, endeavour to appear all'smiles$nd sunshine? But take the same girl after marriage. SIie ha* attained the height of her ambition -a husband, home, and probably a position. Very soon her husband and her home, instead of being her first study, are her last, and only sought as a last resource when out-doer pleasures cease to please. The Neglected Husband comes home to find his wife out, his evening meal left to the servant; no bright face to cheer him—all looks desolate. Poor man! he might as well be single. Is it to be won- dered at If, after perhaps a succession of lonely meals, he avoids his home, and seeks companionship elsewhere ? The second reason, I believe, of unhappiness is—women are too fond of striking the iron while it is hot The husband returns, tired and worried with business; perhaps may utter a hasty word. The wife, instead of keeping quiet, uses her sledge-hammers of remonstrance, ajid at the same time poura into his already weary ear all her fancied grievances. Would she only wait until her husband has cooled a little, and then in a gentle, loving way remonstrate, and inquire the cause of his vexation, men would not be so ready to run away from home to avoid being henpecked. We have been married five years, and are as happy as the days are long; each year teems happier than the last. I have always ftlt that we are lovers still, and take more care to please my detr hiulj md now than when we were courting. If he is a little bit crusty I let hnji alone, and all soon comes right. We have no family, but are perfectly contented in each other's society, and consider our home the dearest place on earth. If I can Or only induce one out of the many who will read this to profit by these hints, I aliall feel that f have given my mite towards lessening the number of "Thoughtless Husbands" or "Neglected Wivea.Yours, Ac NUMBER TWO WHO WOULD NOT BB UNMARRIED FJR WORLDS, I am a husband of nearly thirty years' experience, ^4 I thought this morning that the face of my old woman was poft and as fair as it was some twenty-nine seasons back. I tui&Jf I can tell why. I do not play at any game of er chance, I ne,ver ¡j¡et drunk, nor stop out o'nights; indeed, I am only too glad to rp«t at home, and, above all, I court my wife as much now as I did wi.en she was "sweet eighteen." If I can manage it, I remember her birth and weddiug days A new dress, a jewel, or even a simple flower and should she boo jveji I try all I know to smooth her pillow, and, above all, I never tUow either children or servauts to rebel against her authority as distress of the house—I need scarcely add ferity* house is s. happy home. I said to a would-be dauoht the other day, Lbot .cut for a loving, affectionate lovin* 8ister, and if you use her well you will get a (' e aild mother for yourself and little ones." M&?18 a thing, I take it, nch what the couple please to make it." ■ Yours, &c., FAOT. artfif/orcfever'eaonirh^at the "Neglected Wife" is not ffiMAn^vtokeeohfrn umuae and ioterest her husband sufficiently R/H?? home during the evening. A younc wife should ind that a man's habits and pursuits KQ totally different as a bachelor, or even as a married man. to those of a woman; and it is necessary that he should be weaned or schooled gradually and carefully to a new mode of life. Be has been accustomed to spend all his spare time m roaming about, going here, there, ánù everywhere: in fhnrt, always on the motion, indulging in the freedom and licence of his friends' chambers, and making IIp their parties of pleasure, enlivened frequently by the fair sex. In pur- suing this sort of life, much money is spent unprofitably, and lrequently upon those whose interest it is to use the art of fascination, or worse, to trade upon the passions and weaknesles of our sects; but it is exciting and enjoy- ab'e to a rational extent, and a good knowledge of tne world and its ways is gained. In my opinion a man should have sufficient moral courage to resist mar- rying until he feels that he has had enough of it, and can settle down and appreciate a quiet home aBd the love and care of one, and one only. But it is too often the case that a man hurries a young woman to become his wife because "other fellows are after her," and he is afraid of 10si.LIg her, or has become weary of the monotony of courtship. The honeymoon is an agreeable change for both, but the hus- band begins very soon to tire of wandering through shady groves, and mooning, and quoting scraps of poetry, and is anxious to get bacl^tohis business, or to see his bachelor friends, and breathe freely and carelessly. Generally the young wife is rather spooney, and hang» about him, wishing to go wherever he goes, particularly if she suspects (as she generally does) that he will see some pretty girls or an old sweetheart; and she. generally assumes a look of severe ..Tirl t-aof- ha.A.l.'l. tn O littlfl qilifct Oil i fnlH dignity H* mmna '.la htmm. fhillp.j care to give them a hearty i:1Vita.tion, particularly iI hi5 means be limit6d. Now for my receipt. The young wife should stUdy her husband's disposition and habits, aud be- come acquainted ",ith. the extent of his msan*. It' lie showa any restlessness, rr de-sire to go ont at nights, she may feei certain that he craves for 1. hat which he cannot obtain at home, and sbe should act accordingly, and satisfy his desires. She should sympathise, talk, and take an interest in his business or pleasures, and keep him amused aud interested by discussing his favourite topics, He will won flud tllat it is more agreeable and saving to wn1k out with his wife. hnd stay with her during tte evening and jf she would en- courage him to invite his friends, sans certUnonie. and brine their sisters now ana then, so much th3 her,ter. He wIll feel proud of her and she ounht not to show jealousy or annoy- ance, for she can at any time, in a quiet way, weed them out to her own liking. She should also get into the hahit of reading to him, particularly if he is not agoodtulktr. Young married ladies too frequently show a coldness to their hus- band's bachelor friends, and will leave the room and sit like Patience upon a monument, instead of joining in conversa- tion and keeping them indoors smoking their cigars, and listening to a little music. Alas! mu'ic is generally for- gotten after marriage, and she is no longer the fascinating girl that sbe ns id to be, but quiet and commonplace. I tep.r I have trespassed too much upon your valuable space, but will write again if my letter is a-ppreciateù-Yonr obedient servant, AN ARTFUL DOG.

WIFE MUKDER THROUGH JEALOUSY.

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