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THE w STAR" STORIES
THE w STAR" STORIES No. IV. POOR 'P"RIN CE. CHAPTER I. THE PRINCE. About two years ago one of the best-known figures on the Paris boulevards was undoubtedly the Neapolitan Prince, Prince dei Cittadine. He was one of the handsomest as he was certainly one of the shabbiest of Tortoni's customers at the amiable hour of the absinthe. People wondered how it was that the severe maitre d'hotel of what is still the most fashionable cafe in Paris could allow so really disreputable-looking a man as was this Prince to enter such a cafe. The reason was that, ever since he had been in Paris, de Cittadini had been a customer at Tortoni's, and a very good customer he had been at times. The story of his ruin had been the one day's gossip of the boulevard. They said that it was at the Pommes de Terre Club that, in a furious game of baccarat tournant the last blue bank-notes that remained of one of the finest fortunes south of .Naples had been lost. Others said it was little Aimee who had levanted with the debris of what she had destroyed. It was along the beaten -path -that the Prince had gone to his ruin—like so many before him like so many who will follow him. Very few, however, knew the real rea,son of the' wilful follies that had brought him to be what he was. Dei Cittadini was no fool, and if he had acted like a fool in ruining himself in the old, silly ways, it was because, a great sorrow being his, and a large despair, he was indifferent to all things else. He had this sorrow and this despair to drown, .and it was in his mad follies that he had attempted to do so. There had been much method in his madness, though none of his friends knew it. The reason of his sorrow and of his despair was a common one. When he left Naples to see life in Paris, he was in love with a charming young girl, who at the time had told him that she tod loved him, and would be his wife whenever he might desire that to be. Only six months later shehad married another man, a man his inferior in every way, and within a year had died of her own hand for shame and sorrow at the alliance she had con- tracted. It was from the day.that Prince dei Cittadini had read in 11 Ptingolo, of Naples, of the suicide of La Marchesa di Mirevolta that he had begun to plunge. It was not long, either, before even he had reached the end of his tether. Pa.ris has swallowed up bigger, men and lirger fortunes in even shorter time. Dei Cittadini got very little pleasure out of the process. Most men who ruin themselves, have at least a good time of it whilst the ruin is going on. Cleopatra had. doubtless, some kind of enjoyment when she swallowed her pearl "à la vinaigre," the costliest aperitif that history has record of. Dei Cittadini, on the other hand, seamed neithar to seek nor to expect pleasure in return for the money lie squandered. When little Aimea—or was it the croupier at the Pommes de Terre Club ?—had taken his last pile of bank-notes, and the Prince was a ruined man, he merely shrugged his shoulders, laughed, and said "I am ruined. Taut mieux. Life begins to be interesting." None of his friends laughed with him, but that was natural enough; as he had no money. His sister, the Principessa di Moiiteleone, hearing of his distress, entrusted the bankers to pay him through his agents in Paris a monthly pension of one hundred francs—that is, in English money, twenty shillings a week, about a third of what she paid her second "oHicer of the mouth," or chef. The Prince accepted the pension, but spent it .each month on a costly bouquet which he sent to his sister. It is kind of you," he wrote to her, "to give me the means of showing you that I still love you." After the fifth bouquet the Princess gave orders that the allowance should be stopped. How did the Prince live ? He had a small room in a hotel, in the Rue Tronchet. This cost him twenty francs a month, including service. His breakfast consisted of a penny roll and a cup ef black coffee. which he pre- pared himself over a spirit lamp. His dinner-the only real meal of the day—he took at a prixe-fixe restaurant at ane shilling. His aperitifs Tortoni's cost him one franc a day. His expenses were thas largely covered with four pounds a month. To earn these four pounds was difficult enough for a man of his habits and prejudices, but he usually succeeded in doing so each month. Per- haps one month he would make more, but then, again, another month he made less. He had, like the many needy outcasts of Paris, number less voca- tions. He gave Italian lessons, 'he played in suburban orchestras, he distributed prospectuses in the streets, he posed as a model to painters, he com- posed patters for street beggars and hawkers.; he even tried his hand in the cast-away tobacco trade, collecting stumps of cigars, cigarette-ends, and selling the tobacco thus obtained at the weekly market on the Place Maubert., He tried all honest means of earning a livelihood. He never did a dishonourable thing. If he had cared to be dishonest, or even merely unscrupulous, with his knowledge of the world, with his manners, and with his name, he I could have been the most successful chevalier dyIndustrie in Paris. But he did not. That is dirty," he would say when any- thing of the kind was proposed to him. It was not long, however, before he grew dis- gusted with his life of poverty. To the contrary of his anticipations, he found the struggle for life very far from being interesting—cruel, dull, monotonous I, and unpicturesque. It was then that he regretted his folly. What possible reason had he to ruin himself ? Because the Signora M had married another man, who had maltreated her, and she had committed suicide ? How did it help matters that he was ruined ? If he had committed the same suicide as she, well and good; but this felo-de-se was so much worse-this social death, which was life and suffering in death. And years went on and on. The hideous struggle continued. He was now wall past the middle age, and it seemed to him as if his life had always been thus-a needy struggle, an incessant privation. At times he would look at fashionable restaurants from the street and ask himself Is it possible that I ever dined there?" He had reached that lowest stage of misery when the patient. accepts his suffering without revolt and falls, without attempting to escape, into his routine. His only consolation was his name, and his only pleasure was the one hour daily he spent at Tortoni's. People used to laugh at him as a penni- less Prince, and he would often be reproached for wearing his title under the circumstances. Why should I not ?" he would say. Is it nob my name ? Was it not my father's name ? Have I done any- thing to disgrace it ? He could not understand why sometimes, when he was gathering cigar-ends in front of some cafe, one customer would nudge another and say You see that man ? That is the Prince de Cittadini. A genuine Prince, mon ølwl" To enjoy his daily visit to Tortoni he had often to go without a dinner, but he would not, and could not, deprive himself of his only pleasure. He had a special suit, which he put on to go in every afternoon it was terribly shabby, but still re- sembled the garb of a gentleman. He liked being amongst respectable people even for a short time, even though he felt that he was but an outeast, and merely admitted on sufferance. Sometimes the sight of the happy ones of the world would make him so discontented with his position that he would try his fortune at one of the many gaming- tables of Paris in the hope of some piece of luck might be the first rurig of the ladder out of the alough in which he found himself. He invar ably lost his all, as it was easy to foresee he would, see- ing what was A very small capital he used to ap- proach the tables. If I could only get a couple of thousand louis," .he used often say, even only-a couple of thousand francs, and could play with these, I should be certain of making my fortune again. CHAPTER II. A PROPOSAL. One morning in December,:at the coldest time of the year, the Prince was awakened in his little attic on the fifth storey of the Hotel des Anglais by lirst somebody knocking at his door. At first he made ce answer, because he was afraid that it was his landlord, with whom he had had an animated dis- cussion on the previous evening, and who had threatened to turn him out unless his long-due rent was paid. The Prince was just then in a very bad way indeed, literally without a sou he had fasted two whole days, and had no reason to hope any change of regime for at least two more days to come. He had no friends from whom to borrow money, and nothing to pawn. As the knocking, however, eontinued, he was at last forced to open the door, admitting, instead of an irate landlord, an obsequious little Jew attor- ney, with whom he had done business years ago, in the time of his days of fortune, and whenever he needed money. This man was an agent d'affaires, occupying himself with all kinds of jobs, honour- able and otherwise, but chiefly otherwise. What brings you here ?" asked the Prince, getting back to his wretched bed. I want a Prince," said the agent d'affaires. For some board of directors on a swindling con- oern, I suppose. You know it is quite useless to propose anything of the sort to me, don't you ? Get out Beg pardon, it's nothing of the sort. It's for a marriage. Allow me," he continued, holding up his hand li allow me to state the case to you, and then accept or refuse as You like; but don't be violent. A certain very wealthy lady who is unmarried at present-she is a widow, by the way-has the ambition to be a Princess and to be married. She does not wish to have anything to do with her husband, but to preserve her entire freedom. Indeed, it is to be understood that immediately after the marriage the two spouses shall separate, and have no further communication with each other. No, there are no children to be fathered or anything of that sort. It is a perfectly honour- able affair. The lady will give her husband five thousand louis on her wedding-day, and I shall have the pleasure of paying- that sum over to him, minus any commission he may think fit to pay me. Now, I have on this piece of paper a list of princes, authentic princes, in Paris, to whom such an offer can be made with some chance of success. Your name is fourth on the list, and you are the fourth person on whom I call. The first, a Bavarian nobleman, was out. He is at Mazas for card- sharping. I am glad to have found you." Yes, that happens often to me. I take it as'all in the day's business. Well, I was telling you about the result of my morning's work. My second Prince, a Sicilian gentleman, has been taken up by a wealthy widow, who means to marry him as soon as her year of mourning is over, and meanwhile makes him a very good allowance. The third, a Roumanian, was so completely intoxicated that it was impossible to make him understand the object of my visit. I hope to have better fortune with you." What is the lady's name ? Mademoi—I moan lViadame Alice Chenier." The Prince renectsd. I don't know that name," he said. "A very honourable lady indeed," said. the attorney, and one any man might be proud to call his wife." But apparently," said the Prince, the man who marries her is not to have the enjoyment of her society. How can one be proud of a wife from whom he lives separated ? Yes, that is the condition but there a.re pos- sible eventual modifications. Women are so cap- ricious. fflifin, one hundred thousand francs is a consideration, and "—glancing round the miserable room—"would doubtless be very acceptable to you. To put my offer in plain words are you prepared, Monsieur le Prince dei Cittadini, to give your name to an honourable woman who wishes to enter the married state, but is. at present, disinclined for the duties of a wife ? In short, she only wants to be married, and a Princess, and nothing else. I must add that I want an immediate decision, as the matter presses. The cash will be paid immediately after the ceremony, and you would be secured by a. bill I would give you on receiving your consent, payable on the day of your marriage with Madame Chenier. I should even be willing to make you a small advance, towards expenses of toilette, and to keep you in comfort until the wedding." So saying, the little man opened the pocket-book he held in his hand and took out a thousand-franc note. Do you accept ?" he asked. You are robbing me," retorted the Prince. The price is a higher one. It is double what you offer me. You want to make fifty per cent. com- mission out of this affair." That is my business," said the attorney quietly. Every man for himself. Please let me have an answer at once. If you accept, take this thousand- franc note "—he held it out-" and let me go. If not, I must apply elsewhere. I have a German on my list, who would do it for a quarter of the money, but he is such a notorious scoundrel,that I fear my client might object to wear his name. Well, do you accept ?" "I do," said the Prince, putting out his hand and taking the note, and I take your word for it that the affair is an honourable one. If I find out the contrary, I promise you to break your back." And Monsieur le Prince will be at liberty to do so in such a case," cried the attorney, who was much elated with his success. I will make out the bill I alluded you, whilst you sign me this receipt for the money I have given you." Oh, I am going to order something to eat," said the Prince. I will sign anything you like after breakfast. At present I am starving." I wish I had known that before," muttered tho little man "I could have got him for half the money." As soon as he had written and signed the pro- missory note, he handed it to the Prince and said, The marriage will come off as soon as possible. You must entrust me your papers, and I will attend to all the formalities. You shall receive due notice of the date, which will certainly not be later than a week hence. The marriage will be a civil one only. I say," he added, no nonsense. You are not a married man already, are you ? Be off shouted the Prince, or I'll break your neck Yes but you must first give me the papers." When he had gone, the Prince sent for his bill, and, to the great astonishment of the hotel-keeper, paid it with a thousand-franc note, receiving nine hundred and fifty francs in charge. At last he said, as he sat down to breakfast —" at last I get out of my misery. I shall be careful not to return to it. CHAPTER III. MARKIED. Two days later the maitre (l'hôtel of Tortoni's bowed to the ground before a most distinguished- looking gentleman, who entered the cafe at the hour of the absinthe. It was some time before he recognised the Prince, and was too well-bred a servant to show it when he did. The habitues were, however, less polite, and stared at him to their hearts' content. He was very fashionably and tastefully attired, and looked what he was. Do you see the Prince ? whispered S- of the Echo de Paris, to little M——, of La France. "The Queen of Spades has smiled at him at last." Yes," said M——, screwing his glass still firmer into his eye, unless it is the Queen of Hearts." "How cruel you are!" said S "you know the Prince is honour itself. But you cannot forgive him his name, democrat that you are." "It is not that," said M "But I know my Paris, and am cynical." That same evening the Prince received a note from the agent d'affaires :—" The marriage is fixed for Wednesday next, and will take place at the Mairie, in the Rue Drouet, at ten in the morning. I shall call on you to-morrow with some papers you must sign." On the following Wednesday, accordingly, the Prince betook himself to the Mairie in the Rue Drouet, accompanied by the agent d'affaires and a clerk of his, who were to act and sign as his wit- nesses. Madame Chenier, with her two witnesses, was in waiting in the public room in which the civil marriages are performed. She cast an indif- ferent g]ance at her future husband, but seemed pleasantly surprised at his appearance. The Prince examined her carefully and with curiosity. She was a very handsome woman, appeared a lady, and was tastefully, if simply, dressed. There wa.s no embarrassment on either side. The wedding, performed by the Mayor in his I tricolour scarf, took just five minutes another two minutes were spont in signing the ac-ie de marriage, and the minute after the newly-married couple separated without exchanging a single word. The Princess drove off in an elegant brougham, and her husband, accompanied by his witnesses; sdjoarncd to the Cafe Richelieu to finish the transation. The Princess's witnesses, who had been picked up in the Hue Drouot, and who made a profession of acting as such atci viI weddings, went to talk the matter over at a neighbouring marcharid de vin's, where they agreed that it was the strangest wedding at which either had ever assisted. l,la Magnificent, niagnificenb said the attorney, as they sat down in the inner room of the Cafe Richelieu. "You behaved splendidly. I saw that Madame Chenier was very pleased with your. Perhaps but that is not the question just now. It remains for me to pay over to you a certain sum against my bill." Which I had in my hands," said the,Prince. Tke attorney took a portfolio from his pocket, and, opening it, brought for a packet of bank- notes. Here are 94,000 francs," he said, holding out his hand for the bill. And I want a hundred," said the Prince. "No, no. You have already received one, as per receipt herewith. Five I deduct as my com- mission." "You are hard, my Prince. Well, then, I will add two thousand more, and let no more be said. Ah, you are reasonable. Yes, count the notes. All right, n'est-ce-pas ? So now we can separate. Apropos, you must give me your address. I may have one or two more affairs to propose to you." Not of the same kind. however." "No. You can't be husband to more than one wife, unfortunately, or I should have plenty of affairs to propose. You would not care to adopt an orphan, I suppose ? Not at present." Bonjour, mon Prince." Bonjour, Monsieur." That night the Prince went to the Cercle des Arts, in the Rue Taitbout. "Lucky in love, unlucky at cards, and vice- versa," he had said to himself. "This is ray wedding-night, and I don't know where my wife is. I ought to have some luck to night, especially with the capital I dispose of." At midnight, the bank being a strong one, he had lost 90,000 francs. At three in the morning,. after various up and downs, he was reduced to 500 francs. With these he took a bank at .the baccarat table, turned down nine eight times running, then burst the bank, rising from the table with 200,000 francs. He continued play as a punter with equal good fortune, and by the time play ceased for the night, or morning, he had trebled his dowry, after one of the moat exciting nights he had ever passed. A very pleasant wedding-night I have had," he said, as he returned to his hotel. i am now. compared to what I was a month ago," he said to himself when he had reached his rooms and had spread his wealth out before him, a wealthy man. By investing this money in Italians I shall have a clear income of one thomsand francs per month that is to say. ample enough to enable me to lead a comfortable life in harmony with my tastes and my position. And that is what I will do. Thank God, I can be happy at last." CHAPTER IV. AKD AFTEK. And he did what he had said. After taking a comfortable bachelor's apartment and furnishing it suitably, he invested his money, and settled down to a quiet life. After all the storms he had gone through, this was suprema happiness. It is almost well to have suffered." he would say at times, it teaches one how to appreciate the simple comforts of life." Of his wife he had heard nothing for two years, and had almost forgotten all about her, when one day, at Tortoni's, he took up The Cardinal liiehelieu, a blackmailing boulevard sheet, and read amongst the Echoes of Paris," the following paragrn.ph Amongst the fashionable folk to be seen in the Bois every afternoon is the Princesse dei C-. This lady fives heaself very offensive airs. Unfor- tunately for her high and mighty dignity, most Parisians remember the escapades of Madame Alice C-- at the time that she was the glory of La Grenouillere and the pet of the Elysee Montmartre. The Prince jumped up, ordered his carriage, and drove off to the Alle des Acacias. After driving upi and down the avenue—which just then was full of fashionable equipagas-f or about half an hour, he passed a landau in which he recognised his wife. She was admirably dressed, and looked superb in her beauty. Her eyes met those of the Prince. She was for passing him by without a sign of recognition, when he jumped from his carriage into the road, ran up to her landau, and entered it, taking his seat by her side. Madame la Princesse," he said, I must have a few words with you. I must, do you hear' Tell your coachman to drive up to some side avenue where we can talk." His tone was so determined that the lady felt forced to ob«y. Two minutes later they were walking side by side in one of the little lanes in the wood. Monsieur," said the Princess, you have not kept your agreement. You were not to molest me. Is it money you want ?" The Prince started as if he had been struck. I see mow," he said, that I have merited such suspicion. But Lichtenburg told me the affair was honourable. I did not think my rSle was to be that of the accommodating husband." Ah," said the lady. 1 ought te have known that any business pass- ing through the hands of that scoundrel must necessarily be of the dirtiest kind. But I was too wretched to think at all, except what a relief the sum that was offered would be." Well, what do you propose! What do you want I" I wish to claim you as my wife. I wish to be able to protect you, inasmuch as you bear my name, against such attacks as the one in the papers this morning. I am not responsible for your past, but I can make you respected now and for the future.. I want the right to punish any attack made on you—as bearing my name." But," cried the lady, I bought the right to wear your name. I paid £4,000 for it, which you accepted. I have your receipt." I know. I know. But I did not know the use you were going to make of my name. I did not fancy that it was to legitimate your conduct, for what is disreputable in an anonyrna, is permissible in a woman of the world and a Princess. As to your money, I hold it at your disposal. It has not been touched." What do you want me to do ? "To live with me as my wife, at least, in the eyes of the world. I do not care what you have been. I will protect you from insult, which touches me through you. Look at this he cried, spreading out the paper, which he had held crumbled up in his hand ever since he had picked it up at Tortoni's. Do you see what they say of you ? Mon Dieu he cried, 11 what is this ?" His attention had been attracted to another paragraph, also in the Echoes of Paris," which was just below the one referring to his wife, and was a continuation thereof. It is true that the Princess. aforesaid is under the protection of the Marchese di M (tha tragic suicide of whose wife at Naples has invested him with much romantic interest in the eyes of the ladies), and the Marquis is a very rich man. But this dooa not excuse the conduct of the Princess in entirely forgetting her old friends, and in treating former colleagues like the dirt under her feet," Woman he cried, seizing the Princess by the a.rm, is that the Marchese di Mirovolta that is meant ?" You hurt me she cried. You are brutal. Yes, I do know the Marquis de Mirevolta, and I shall ask him to chastise you for your insolence towards me. It is his: money you had." The Prince burst out laughing wildly, and, still laughing, ran away. The man is mad," said the Princess as she walked back to her carriage. (Test egal, he is a handsome fellow, my husband." There was a look of reverie in her eyes as she leaned back among the cushions of her landau. And the Prince ? Straight home he ran, laughing all the way. and never stopped until he reached his rooms. And here he did two things. He- wrote on a piece of paper the following words I am an impostor. I have lived in Paris as the Prince dei Cettadini, whose papers I robbed in Naples. I ara an ex-convict and a swindler. I have lived by card-sharping ever since I have been in Paris, and the money now in my possession is the proceeds of my crimes. I desire that it should be given to the poor. who will pray for my soul. (Signed) "CARL Rosso, ex-Convict, (alias Prince Carlo dei Cettadini). P.S.—I formally declare that I have no right to the name of Cettadini, and that Rosso is my real name." This declaration he put in an envelope, which he addressed to the Commissary of Police of his quarter, and laid the envelope on the table well in view. He then took a revolver out of his bureau- drawer, and deliberately blew out his brains. Poor Prince !—who lost all except his honour, and sacrificed his life to save his name. Madame was right. He must have been mad.— Robert H. Sherard in Pall Mall Bcedget.
ITHIS AND THAT.
I THIS AND THAT. <i One of the most interesting books of reminis- cences is that which Mr. McCullagh Torrens issues this week through Mr. Bentley. The story of Mr. Disraeli's youthful confession to Lord Melbourne that he was going some day to be Prime Minister is re-told. It appears that before telling the story in print Mr. Torrens thought he ought to see Mr. Disraeli about it. He did sea him in Whitehall- gardens, and g'ot the tale which he now reproduces in the late Lord Beaconsfield's own words. Mr. Disraeli said I do not remember having, in the days of Vivian Grey," ever seen Mrs. Norton except a.t a ball or the opera, but I knew her brother Charles, who was the handsomest creature that G-od ever made, and through him I became one of her acquaintances, and, I believe I may say, her friends. You remember the small house in Bird- cage-walk, where that wretched husband of hers chose to live, and where the menage was on such a limited footing that I remember to have seen a difficlllty about knives and forks, though the num- ber of guests was necessarily small. Lord Mel- bourne, from the Home Office, kept us waiting half an hour, nothing uncommon with him, for iu everything unimportant he was the most easy- going, dilatory, beg-your-pardon sort of man and before we sat down my good hostess presented me with great empresaement to him. The table was not long, but he was, of course, at the top of it, and I was at the bottom, and when our frugal feast was ended, he said to me, a propos of nothing: Well, youngster, what are you up to?" I hesitated for a moment to reply, and he added What do you want to be ?" This, of eourse, stirred me up, and I replied, I want to be Prime Minister." At this point Mr. Torrens tells us he interrupted Mr. Disraeli with the inquiries "Then you really did condescend to prophesy as we are told ? What did the Minister say ?" Mr. Disraeli went on He looked grave, and said quite in a business tone, Ah, that will never do. You had much better lay your account for some reasonable posi- tion when your friends come in (if they ever do), and qualify accordingly. But as for the lead, if you were in Parliament you would see that the succession is already fixed inevitably for the rest of our time in the Peels and Derbys." We had some quiet and agreeable conversation afterwards, and I met him once or twics in the same delight- ful company. But I don't think he thought much of me, and I was not thrown into collision with him except at Taunton, where Lyndhurst advised me stand against your old chief, Labouchera. Mr. Torrens recalls how ten years later Melbourne, who had never forgotten the dialogue at Bird- cage-walk, was overheard muttering to hirpself. By Jove! I believe he'll do it after all." Mr. Torrens' reminiscences of the Irish members include a curious observation on the late Mr. Parnell, of whom he says When standing at the Jabls to take the oath of ac'riiission, Bright, who sat near him on the front bench, was struck by his look, that had so much of craft and so little of time-serving in it, and—turn- ing to the colleague who sat beside him-he mut- tered through clenched teeth, as was his way lie has the eye of a madman." His unexplained reserve, which every day grew, if possible, more intense, at first repelled and then perplexed, but ultimately fascinated, the Celts and it became at last one of the spells that few of those near him ventured to make free with, far less to question. No book relating to the Parliament of 1880 would be complete without its story of Major O'G-ormau. This is Mr. Torrens's story Major O'Gorman would have taken it ill had anyone questioned the sincerity of his belief in the Church, but he made no profession of being what is oalled a practical Catholic, and the occasions were not rare, in or owt of Lent, when he forgot, towards sundown, the day of the week. One very hot afternoon, when he had been faithfully sitting, if not standing, up for the neglected rights of Iroland, he relapsed into a dose, during which the House, adjourned, and he found himself without a comrade in political battle, driven to the alterna- tive of seeking at his club, or in the precincts of the Parliamentary dining-room, for the renewal of the strength whereof he was not a little proud. Choosing the latter as the readier resource, he called for the carte, which an Irish waiter was prompt to lay before him. In a somewhat dis- satisfied tone he said, "No, not the fish; give me the other." The attendant muttered unobtrusively, but loud enough to be heard, This is Friday, sir": but the Major was obdurate, and, looking down the menu, pointed to a grilled fowl, which he desired to have with a pint of madeira. He had not long been engaged in the appropriation of the savoury viand, when the waiter approached, tendering him a visiting card which bore the name of the priest of the parish that had done most to return him. For a moment he hesitated, and then exclaimed. Well, take away the devil, and show in the priest." —o—. At all the post offices and post agencies through- out Luxemburg there is now a workman's registry office, or Bourse du Travail. Employers who want workmen and 'vyorkmen who desire work write thoir wants on postcards and send them to the head post office in Luxemburg. Here their wants are registered. In the evening, after the last post, a collection is made of all the postcards. Thsy are then systematically arranged and printed and the next day distributed to all the post offices. The Post Office officials then place the lists in con- spicuous positions, so that all may see them. It is stated that the posting of these lists has already been of great service. —o— An Illinois paper states that the President of the Humane Society has issued a want against Millionaire J. C. Doane for docking his horses' tails contaary to the Illinois statute. The highest penalty for this offence is imprisonment for one year. -0- A woman has been elected Assistant-Sergeant- at-Arms for the House of Representativee of the State of Arkansas. -0- Who would be an agricultural labourer ? A correspondent supplies the following as the budget of an agricultural labourer and his wife living in a village in mid-Essex :—The man,* aged about 50, has been in constant employ on a farm, and ia hale and strong. His wife is also in goad health, and two or three years his junior, Income at present time 12s. a week. To this must be added occasional small sums earned by the wife by odd jobs of washing and charing.. Expenses (approxi- I mate)—rent, 2s. Gd.; coals, 2s. bread, 2s. Sd. cheese, 5d. bacon, Is. Sd. herrings. 4d.; butter (margarine), 5d.; sundries, 3d. This gives a total of 10s. Id. for expenses of food and shelter, leaving a credit balance of Is. lid. To this must be added occasional doles of clothes, food, and coals. An elderly maiden, who has suffered some disap- pointment, thus defines the human race :—Man—a conglomerate mass of hair I tobacco-smoke, confusion, conceit, and boots.—Woman—The waiter, perforce, on theaforesaid animal.—Husband—Aninstrument constructed to growl over shirt buttons that arn't there."—Wife—A machine for darning stockings, sewing on shirt buttons, and making puddings and other things.—Father—A being who thrashes the boys, and won't fork over" as his fair olive branches desire.—Mother—A pleasant dream—a sweet vision of childhood.—Child—A compound of delightful and distressing' elements.—Child—An invention for keeping people awake at night, and for the aggrandisement of washerwomen. —o— At the meeting the Glasgow Chamber of Com- merce on Monday, President Balloch denied that there was a greater want of employment than last year. Shipping was severely depressed through over production, but large tonnage would force British ships into new channels, and would there- by tend to maintain Great Britain's position against other nations. Indications pointed to brighter times all round. They regarded Mr. Cleveland United States President Elect, as the pionear of Frea Trade in America. -0- They say that Misa. Tararaboomdeay is bringing back with her from America 18,000" 'dollars—aot a bad solatium, if the fact be as stated—for singing that song. The lady has been paid, they calculate, at the rate of ten dollars a minute, which is one better than the best ever achieved by the greatest of the prime donne. One i3 glad to find the prima donna going" second for once. -0- Mr. Pritchard Morgan, M.P., tha whilom" gold king" of Wales, and the redoubtable opponent of Mr. Goschen, on the royalties question, has been exceptionally quiet during the recess, and would seem indeed, coutrary to his woat, to have secluded himself from public observation. The explanation is that Mr. Morgan has been studying law, no longer as a litgant, but as one who seeks a new sphere of usefulness and profit to a counsellor in litigation. The Radical member for Merthvr has obtained a certificate which entitles him to be admitted a solicitor of the High Court of England, and thus armed he is reading up with a view of being called to the Bar, whera presumably he hopes to findfiiiore constant employment than in prospeetimg for gold among the Welsh hills. -0-- I am glad to see that the Queen has made a New Year's gift to the fund that has been raised for Paying off a debt on the Wesleyan Methodist Chapel at East Cowes. That £ 15 sent by the Sovereign to the Nonconformist Christians who are her near neighbours in the Isle of Wight is a timely rebuke to those of her Majesty's subjects who have only abuse and ill-will to spare for people who differ from them in religious opinion and I hope they will take it to heart as the Queen's expression of & wish for charity and toleration to- ward all creeds alike in her dominions. Her Majesty was highly pleased with the resolution she received from the Liverpool City Council, thanking the Queen for her handsome donation of £2,000 to the University College. -0- If there is any truth in the somewhat startling rumour that Prince Ferdinand, of Bulgaria, is going to marry the daug'hter of Herr Bleiehroeder. the wealthy Jewish banker of Berlin, the future Princess of Bulgaria will be the first Jewess who has ever aat upon a European. Throne as a Jewess. The wife of the reigning Prince of Monaco was baro. in the Jewish faith, but when she married her first husband, the Due de Richelieu, she accepted the Catholic faith, and she was. therefore, a Catholic when Prince Albert married her. -0- It is very well-known that the Prince of Wales invariably sets instead of follows the fashion in male attire, and that it is not the slighest good for &ny tailor to try and persuade him that such and such a garment is the proper thing to wear. H.R.H. has his own taste and knows it, and very soon lets the tailor know it, too. It is, however, not so generally known that he also dresses his wife aud daughters, and has done for several years past. The Princess has little or no trtSte in dress, 1 and never wa,s taught anything about it at homo, for the Danes are about tne worst dressers in Europe, not even excepting the Germans, aud they are bad enough in all conscienoe the moment they get out of uniform. —o— In Japan, if a woman is not married by a certain age, the authorities pick out a man whom they compel her to marry. This may keep down, the old maids, but it increases the number of male suicides. -0- This is how the Berlinese deck their tables. A few days ago, at luncheon at a Royal hunt near the New Palace, the long table was lighted by a number of Christmas trees with their wax candles, instead of the silver candelabra. The centre piece was a large cabbage made of papier mache, which was surrounded by marvellously-designed young hares, made of the same material, grouped round the cabbage, and staring hungrily at it. What did it all symbolise ?
FOOTBALL.
FOOTBALL. —— Jflepsrts for this column must be received not later than Tuesday iafternGon to appear in the current week's issue. GLOUCESTKR v. PENARTH. It was found utterly impossible to deoide this cen- test, a blinding snowstorm, accompanied by a cutting wind, sweeping clean across the exposed Penorth enclosure. The abandonment of the match occasioned much disappointment locally, as a very close contest was anticipated. Penarth, it will be remembered, suffered defeat in the initial encounter at Gloucester to tin# tune of 1 goal and 3 tries to 1 goal droppsd by George Shepherd. BRIDGgND V. PONTABDAWE. Pontardawe played Bridgend at the central town in cheerless weather and a flooded field. Smith kicked off for the visitors, and after much desultory play Bridgend registered three minors and a try, uncon- verted. Early in the second half Pontardawe obtained two minors, and Davies for that team secured a try. Bridgsnd got another minor, anÜ the game was drawn in their favour, Bridgend scoring 1 try 4 minors to 1 try 2 minors for the visitors. SOUTH WALES LEAGUE CHALLENGE CUP COMPETITION. Results up to present date Goals. Ply'd. Won. Dr'n. Lost. P'nts. For. Ag'st. Treharris 8 8 0 0 16 42 5 Cardiff 8 7 0 1 14 39 8 Barry Dist. 6 4 0 2 8 24 11 Cwmbach 7 2 1 4 5 7 37 Mount'n Ash 7 2 1 4 5 6 15 Traiewir 7 1 2 4 4 6 18 Pontypridd. 5 0 1 4 1 3 28 Bbiult 6 0 1 5 1 3 8! FIXTURES FOR NEXT SATURDAY. On the Ground of the first-named Clubs. Cardiff ▼. Blackheath. Dowiais v. Cardiff A." Moseley v. Newport. Newport "A" v. Abergavenny. Neath Y. SW[j,Hllea. Swansea A v. Neath A." Llanelly v. Pontypridd. Llanelly A" v. Aberavon A." Aberavon v. Penarth. Gloucester v. Manniagham. Treorky v. Penygraig. Pontardawe v. Ammanford. Llantwit Major v. Barry. Cardiff Northern v. Y.M.F.S. ltoa th v. Cardiff Star. Pontyinoile v. Cogan. Cogan A" v. Conway. Alexandra v. Grange Stars. St. David's v. Llwynvpia. Dynas Powis v. Cardiff Albion. Barry 2nd v. Cardiff Wanderers.
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