Evening Express

TP-DAY S SHORT STORY.] Th,e Cynic. '.Philip Desmond enjoyed the reputation of being the most brilliant journalist in Lon- don. He had made the Morning Mercury," the organ with which he was connected. Yet he was not a popular man. He had no Irien-d. though he was a-dmired by thousands. For he was a cynic. By this name he was known to every member of the staff of the "Morning Mercury." He might have written his name high had it not been for the fact that he despised the things which other men beiki dear. Though the offer of promotion was often held out to him. he refused to avail himself of it, preferring to remain a simple journalist. He was indifferent alike to either praise or condemnation. When the former was showered upon him. he scoffed; when the latter, he laughed. The look of jeering Bcorn on his face at such times caused his colleagues to regard him with open dislike, which, in a number of cas-es, turned to detestation. "He's carrying everything with a high hand," said Smith, the descriptive writer. "But he'll come a cropper before long. He treats us like ca.ttle, but he'll find it won't rin the end. The wheel -ocs round. He'll i7 in Queer Street some day." And yet, when in his "MIS. Philip Desmond had been a singularly sunny-tempered boy- Open-hearted, frank, generous, a favourite tith all whom he met. But, shortly before he attained his majority, the blow fell which embittered his liie. One day his father was the brilliant politicia.n. the leader of thought, the mightly intellectual genius— flattered, courted, lionised, by all sorts and conditions of men. The next day the founda- tion. oi his greatness was uprooted, and the edifice tottered, then fell to the ground. He was thrown from his horse while riding in the Row. and s-nstained injuries to hia head which affected the brain. After a short ill news he recovered a fair measure of health and strength, but his Public life was ended: a life of quietness must be his lot. The world at large heard the news with regret and tendered sympathy, then very soon forgot the affair. Where were the people who bad sought the man's com- pany while he had been in his prime? They bad gone a-hunting. "So this is the value of the world's favour," %wd Philip Desmond, bitterly. A year later his father died. The light of a dreary December afternoon was giving place to twilight, and one by one the street lamps were being lit. Philip Desmond, with his hands in his pockets, was standing in his private room. by the window, razinz abstractedly into the street below. The pale lamp-Light fell full upon his face— hip pale, proud, contemptuous face. It was an interesting face, bearing the impress of distinct individuality. And presently, as he "Kecajne the captive of thoughts he would t..in have put from him, a softer expression epept into it and chased away the hard lines, leaving it not urobeautiful. There was one to whom it was the best and dearest face on earth. 'Four more weeks, and then good-bye to all thfis," he said, softly. And a vision of battle- fields roee before his eyes, whither he was bound. The war of the Mam- tag Mercury" had fallen at the post of duty, Md he had offered to fill the gap. And now thgt he was on the point of leaving England, perhaps never to return, tender thoughts of thoee amorg whom he had moved came to -irtm, and nobody who had seen him then would have said he was a cynic. While he was thus occupied with his thoughts, a number of journalists were hold- ing a whispered consultation in a room in another part of the building. "It's a n*»t plan, Smith, a decidedly neat ;plaa," said one, Clarke cm by name. "But don't yon think it's a little too rough on the Cynic?" "Not after the way he's treated us. He's •■"a beast, and he'll get no more than his deserts. He wants taking down a peg or two, "Well. I rather fancy this affair wiH settle his hash. He'll be tbe laughing-stock of the whole staff, and I don't expect he can stand ridicule any more t.haji the rest of us. lIaveyou written the letters "Two ringh dra-fts; here they are." "Secured the other things?" "Tea An envelope and a sheet of ncte- paper with the eyrie's monogram m, also the-same Quantity of ladies' stationery, and ,7, a n d (Vwimeits .of Miae Stuart's and the Cynic's handwriting. Matthew-son here is the best coPyit. and he's urderta-ken to see the thing throuerh. Fire away, old man." Obedient to orders. Matthew son seated him- self, and exercised his skill upon the materials before him to the entire satisfao *i^- of his companions, who kept up a run-¡ ?iog a?com?niment of humorous ci?,uckiesl, imd low laughter. The next morning Desmond found among Ms correspondence a small envelope, with the superscription in a femir-ine hand. He Opened it. and read a a follows: Dear Mr. Desmond.-I want to see you on a matter of the utmost importance. Will it be convenient for you to meet me at the T- Rooms, Bond-street, to-morrow (Wednesday*, at 7.30 p.m.? Please pardon me for .rit.i1 a.nd do came, —Yours sincerely, MAGGIE 3TUAKT. Desmond gazed at the letter, wholly sur- prised. Mise Staurt was a "Morning )(,erour" typist. He had made her acquaint- ance in his private office, whither she came to type from his dictation, though latterly he had very rarely availed himself of her services. Her, desire to see him was unac- countable, yet he felt that he ought to go. Yes, he would go. The same morning Maggie Stuart was the Xf*cipient of an unlooked-for letter. It ran: D&ar Miss Stua.rt.-I fear yen will be very much surprised when you read this, but not dserpieased, I trust. I want to see you, to speak of my love for you, which I have secretly cherished in my heart for many weeks. fearing to speak lest youtr answer should be unfavourable. Will you meet me at. the Lennox Tea Rooms, Bond-street, to- morrow (Wednesday) at 7.30 p.m.? Pteaet oome: then I can tell you all that is in my beart.-Youcris sincerely, PHILIP DESMOXD. The girl read the missive again, again, and yet again: a rush of red dyed her cheeks; she buried her face in her slim white fingers. But presently she raised her head proudly, and an expression of tenderness was on her f-ce, and the light of happiness was dancin., in her eyes. For she loved hi,m-had loved trim so long; and now he loved her! And she prayed that she might be worthy of him, for she knew that he was at heart a good, true man: her keen love's eyes had pierced the veil of cynicism which hid his real self. Wednesday evening came, and she set out lor the appointed meeting-place. She caught sight of the man she loved waiting for her, and her heart gave a great bound. In silence they met. and clasped hands; hers vas qttivering like an aspen leaf; she dared not look into his face. He drew her hand under his arm and led her inside the tea- room. and in an isolated corner they seated themselves. He ordered the refreshm ent which neither of them needed, yet which was needful to justify their presence in the tea- tcom. Then they were left free to talk. He expected she would open the conversation, but she remained silent, so he said, cour- teously "Please explain the matter you wish to consult me about. I shall be happy to do anything in my power to help you." She looked into his face with astonish- ment. I do not understand what you mean," she said, slowly. It was his tarn to be astonished. "My dear Mise Stuart." he said. "gurely you have not-forgotten the letter you sent me making this appointment?'' "What letter?" she asked. "I sent no letter." He .stared at her amazed. "You sent no letter?" he said, lowering his Voke. "Then why are you here?" _by, you sent. for me." she said, timidly. "No," he murmured, huskily. She bowed her head in shame, and all the fuebiae went out of her life. But Desmond had seen a look in her sweet, pure eyes which cut him the quick. "Tell me more," he said, ^n low, urgent tones. "You say I sent ÏQ; you. Show me the letter!" "I can't," she whispered. "I'm ashamed. I do not know-what you will—think of we-- when you—when Y()'U- "Hush! child," he said. "Can I ever think of you as anything but pore and noble? Show me the letter!" She drew it from her breast and gave it to him, whereupon he handed her the one he had received, and together they read them. "I have not written this," she said, simply. "Nor I this," said he. ? believe my col- leagues are the authors of both. They hate me, and this is their revonge. I would not nave carea, ne added, Mtterly. 'had I been the one to suffer. But it is you whom ",hey have wounded. But what shall you do now?" She looked up into his face with trou-bled eyes. I | ?'I do not know how I shall face them," she said, slowly, "now that they know my shame. Yet I shall have to go back. Oh! dn not think me a coward. Bemember, I'm only a woman." He looked at her curiously for a moment or more, and then he said:- "I have a plan. If you will let me, I will tell them that you are my affianced wife." "Your affianced wife!" she murmured, trembling with excitement. J "Yes. It will be a pretence, you know, very difficult to carry out successfully, but it is the enly way to saye- you. dear Miss Stuart." "But how can it be done: she cried. "Listen," he said. "In three weeks I go to the Transvaal. Yes, it's true. Till then, we can act what I propose. Do you under- stand?" But when you come back," she whispered, breathlessly. "I shall not come back," he said, softly. "Oh! don't say that. You're mad!" she said, huskily. "It is the only way to save you. Come, do you consent?" She bowed her head, and whispered, so that he could scarcely hear: "Yee." Thus they went back. The next morning trie journalists, who had congregated in the general room, fully ex- pecting to witness the discomfiture of the Cynic, were dumfounded to see him enter with Miss Stuart. Without a moment's hesi- tation he led her to them, and said, in tones that everyone could hear: Permit me t-o present to you all my ama-noed wife. As such she is entitled to res- pect, even such respect as gentlemen such as you have it in their power to confer." The journalists slunk away like whipped curs. And then Desmond proudly conducted Miss Stuart to her room. She sat down, and he slowly, very slowly, walked to the door. She watched him, speechless. When he reached the door he paused, and looked over his shoulder. He saw something in her eyes which caused him to turn back. "What is it,Aaggie?" he asked. "Don't go, Philip." she cried. "I oa.n't bear it. Stay with me." He bent down and covered her lips with kisses. "Why, Maggie, I'm coming back soon," he said, smiling. "And you will not forget me when you are away?" she asked. "Never; my love for you is real, real, real. Can't you understand that I discovered after 11 had left you last night that i really loved you with all my heart and soul ?"

For to-day- have a Hot Corn Flour and Milk. Pudding. This pudding, made with good milk and Brown and Poison's u Patent Corn Flour, is warming and nourishing for the children, enjoyable ofr adults, a good dinner sweet, and an agreeable light slipper dish. But boil it well- 10 minutes by the clock-and be sure to use Brown & Poison's Horn Flour I Its delicate flavour and great purity make all the difference in tlfe pudding. Stewed fruits, such as figs* apples, and prunes or preserves go well with this ». -.«■ .A.

A NEW NOVELIST Mr. D. Praser Lumsden, who under the name of Lionel Laggard has written the Australian story, Sweet Isabel of Narra- ge-cn." Mr. Lumsden waa once chief reporter on the "Western Mail," and ia now the H,a118aro" of the Australian Parliament- that is to say, he is the head of the staff appointed to prepare the official reports of the Parliamentary speeches.

For Women Folk. I HOMELY HiNTS AND DAINTY DISHES A scald or burn, if the skin is not broken, cam be oared by placing the burnt pact in Strang stxia-water. A pinoh of carbonate of soda put into the t L--t will increase the strength of the tea. This applies particularly to London, where the water is liard, I A good pomade that will prevent the hair combing out. increase its growth, and give it a nice gloss is made by nixing together five parts of lard, the same of castor-oil, and ten parts each of glycerine and eau de cologne. Apply every morning. Soft leiné I Four ounces sieved icing sugar, one table- spocinfuj of hot water. Mix just warm in a small pan, and spread with a knife. Royal Icing: 3oz. sieved icing sugar, half white of an egg (unbeaten). Mix, beat for a quar- ter of ah hour. Force straight lines on to cake with a thick tube. Delicious and Wholesome Ginger Nuts Take lOqz. flour, 4oz. butter or lard, 4oz. sugar, 1 tablespoonful ground ginger, 5 tabiespoonfuls golden syrup, half teaspoon- fu! carbonate of soda., half teaspoonful mixed spice, 2020. lemon or orange peel, cut very fine. Beat the butter and sugar to a cream. add the syrup, flour, ginger, spice, and peel. Dissolve socla in a little cold milk. Mix and work all up into stiff dough, add- ing a little more flour if necessary. Pull off pieces the size of a nut and bake on well. buttered tins in a quick oven. These ginger nuts are very easy to make. Novel Little Cakes Put in a casserole a quarter-pint of oold water, a-bout 2oz. of butter, a pinch of salt, a little grated Lemon. peel, a few dropcs of orange-flower water. Put it on the are. stir- ring briskly. When it commences to boil draw it away. Take some flour (dried and sifted), mix into the saucepan as muoh as the water will take, being careful to keep it smooth and free from lumps. Put it again on the fire; etir until it dries, leaving the casserole without sticking to the fingers. Put it into a basin; let it oool gradually. Add two eggis (more if needed) one at a time, beat- iTIlg them until the paete sticks to the fingers. Form it into small round cakes, and cook 00 a baking-sheet in a nioderate oven. When oool, open them from one side in the middle, fill with whipped cream, sweetened and flavoured to taste or with preserved fruit. f Hering-saiat .1'.or QeUClOae flavour the German "Hering- sala-t" is unequalled. The smoked herrings used are soaked overnight in milk, next day remove skin and bones, cutting flesh into neat strips. As many potatoes as required are boiled (in skins); when fairly soft, but not overdone, remove skins, and slice pota- toes. Then mince a small quantity of roast veal, chop a few gherkins, a little beetroot, a sour apple, quarter of a root of celery] adding a little lean ham, and a few small onions (all minced). Add these to herring- fillets in salad-bowl with capers, salt, and pepper. To make the sauce a little of the miik in which the herrings were soaked is utilised, together with vinegar, a little claret, a dessertspoonful of gra-vy or meat-extract, and one saltsipoonfal French mustard, the <tre^sinig to be well mixed a.nd the whole tossed lightly together. Just before serving decorate tap with sliced radishes and beet- root, together with flaked hard-boiled Yolk of exg amd a liberal sprinkling of parsley.

NEWPORT EMPIRE That popular London West End actor, Mr. Rabert Caxt-er. supported by a specially selected company, will appear a.t ± ewport in a sketch entitled. Davy Giirriok." It is baaed on the episode in the famous actor's life 'where, in order to cure a lady of her infatuation for him, he feigns drunkenness so that be might disgust her. The mere fdrot that it is written by Mr. Louis C )b,ea at once stamps it as far ahove the ordinary, and in the capable hands of Mr. Carter and his clever company is sure to obtain more than the ordinary applause.

Hockey in South Wales • INTERNATIONAL TRIAl. Hockey is making very considerable head- way in public popularity in South Wales, and widespread interest is centred in next Satur- day's international trial match between representative teams of the North and South on the ground of the Baa-ry Cricket Club. It' is urged that, the numerous clubs in the district shJuLd cancel their fixtures for the -— — k W. H. EVANS, A-bersytwyth. [" E.JE." photo. 2-Ird, and that. their members should show their loyalt-y to the South Wales Hockey Association, by attending the international trial match. They are asked to t.urn up in large numbers and give the visitors a hearty reception. The bully-off will he at three o'clock sharp. The South Wales team is as follows:—Goal, B. Turnbu-11 (Cardiff), reserve F. R. Davies (Swansea); right back, E. W. Richards (Abergavenny), reserve D. T. John (Whitchurch); left back, W. Price (Chepstow), reserve H. T. Williams (Newport); right half. back, Guy Jones (Newport), reserve G. Collins (Swansea); centre half, F. S. Lyne (Newport), reserve W. T. Farr (Swansea); left hand, W. T. Farr Swansea), reserve C. D. Mitchell (Abergavenny); forwards. outside right F. G. Phillips (Newport), reserve H. T. Banwell I (Whitchurch), inside right J. R. Williams (Newport), reserve H. Sweet-Escott (Cardiff), centre forward T. W. Pearson (Newport),' reserve W. H. Evans (Aberystwyth College), inside left W. J. Luncan (Whitchurch)! reserve C. Richards (Swansea), outside leit W. J. Pallet (Whitchurch), reserve P. J. Adams (Barrv). W. H. Evans, of Aberystwyth College, is one of the moet promis.in.g players in the hockey world. He played for West against East at Llanelly, and distinguished himself by <playi'ng a mont unselfish game at centre forward, his feeding of the wings being per- fect. He is r??,,rye centre forwill? to Pearson in the match North v. South. Evans is always in perfect training. He was capped the first year of his entering Aberystwyth College. During the Christmas vacation he played for Bargoed against Barry Firsts, and distin- guished hi-mseif by scoring two brilliant goals.

ONLY DEFENDED HIMSELF > Robert Evans, marine store dealer, Iittle- d-ean Hill, was summoned by David Cole- man, gIPSY, Green bottom, for aseault at Littledean yesterday. Complainant, v who was rather severely marked on the face, said defendant came to him and without the slightest provocation sst about him and severely beat liini. Defendant said all he did was to defend himsel. He had taken oare of himself because complainant threatened him with a stick, wxwch he brandished over t head. The Chairman said the Court had decided to dismiss the ease.

FOREIGN MAILS. To be despatched from London Sunday, Jan. 17:- QUTWAftO.-M.rft'rtC- To United States. Ac., via Southampton. ? Azores by i'ortuguqao packet. Ma?D?Y, JANUARY I& Morning- To Egypt, by Kaliaxi packet. To Canary Ishicds, via Spain. INWARD.-Due Sunday— From Australia and Ceylon, via Naples.

LOCAL TIDE TABLE ¡.; I I 9 • ? s ? ? « 1 5« I £ 3 « S ? Sf ? I & I I: tl  OQ p? 1Q I  I );tl OOI 0 f" Satur- tJH. 0 2 | 0 21 I 04103 0 55 j058 dar, 1 E. 0? 0 51 0 35 0 53 1 26! 131 J.16 HE. I, 28 0 ,3 4 i 18 3 1 24 2 t 26 2 25 9J 24 10 bun- 1 21 1 22 1714 2 4 12 6 day. i 11. | 1 41 I 1 56 1 40 1 38 2 41 242 Jan t7 At 6 1-18 4 24 6 26 4 1 26 1 i 25 4 Ten?t JM. 2 ?0 2 33 2 14 2 lo?8' 3 M d?.. £ 2 56 3 11 2 47 i 2 53 354 356 jM':18? Hl'! 9 5 19 0 36 9 | 28 0 _2L?? I 26 10 lues- i M. 3 .9 3~46 .) 19-33U, 428-1' 43õ r.,v.. E.? 4 2 422 34944 51 5 2 Jan.19?? EP, t 30 4 102 1 ,0 5 1 2762()8295 28_ 11 Wed- 'M. 4 32 4 53 4 20 4 36 j 5 30 5 ?2 .?' E. 5 1 521 4 50 5 3 559 6 1 Jaa>.2, 0 < E. 5 1 21 10? M 3 3) 7 ?1 ? 6 4) 4 t Ht .32 3 5 ^9 5 <8 i 5 19 5 30 6 26 I 6 28 ) k'rs- t 556 6 14 5 46 5 561 65,653 ? & 56 6 141 _5 46 r56 ol 3 5 7 da*. EH* t 33 3 .2 8 ho 9 ?__3? ?4_ 0 3j 7 Jan.12 Eo Doc SUI. TRe*t& B?o. ;AleMadr? Dock.

BILLIARDS AT CARDIFF The finest ajid most exciting of all tie heats of 500 up yet played in the professionol tour- nam-ent at the ftnminer Hotel, Cardiff, was that between A. E. Hamman, Royal Hotel. and A. Turner, Exchange Restaurant, on Fri- day evening. Ha-mmen was only 186 when Turner was 460, and the odds were anything against the former. He, however, began to score in brilliant style, and put on a break of 133. Although nearly 200 behind when Turner wanted some 20 for game. Ham-man pulled up steadily until the game stood 499 aLl, when, amidst the greatest excitement, he made the winning stroke. Scores:— Hammam  500 Turner — —" 499 Stevenson, 8,223; Reece, 7,340. Inman, 16,444; Williams, 15.647.

AIR RtFLE SENSATION Several members of the Merthyr. and Dis- trict Air-rifle League were on Friday sus- pended for a month for taking part in un- authorised competitions. TTie members 80 suspended were T. Beach. Gordon Lonox; W. Davies. No. 2, Maekwoirth. Dowlaia; Reg. Preece. N.EJT.; and T. B. Evans, Merthyr Constitutional Club.

FOOfBALL BRIDGEND FIELD, EBBW VALE. MONDAY, JANUARY 18th, 1909. AUSTRALIA (Kangaroos) v. EBBW VALE. Kick-off Three p.m. Cheap Trains from all parts. elos MARLBOROUGH UNITED (strong Junior) Require GUARANTEE MATCHES for Easter Friday, Satur- day, and Monday, Weet of England.-Fortcr, lis, Kngleheait-roud, Catford, London. elBJ DOWLAIS THISTLES A.F.C. require home match January 23rd; will arrange home und home. »ire or ■write Evans, Treivor Arms, Penywern, Dowlais. ell9 CATHAYS HOVERS R.F.C.. Cardiff, want awny fixture with good juaior team, January 16; have ?veral other dates open; accept ?arantee.-ez, Cathays-terrace, Cardi'f. eMaSfia TON \v y X L AIS JUNIORS E.F.C. want home match for January 23; have al,?o other <*?«'• s open.— J. H. Wright ?ec., Iron ?ridge'road, icngw?-nlais. 6 £ oJli20

I BABEiS IN THE WOOD 7^ Pantomime Babes in the Wood," which has had so successful a season at the Royal, Cardiff, concludes to-day. Mr. Rollo B alma in has secured for several weeks companies that are bound to flii the house after the expiration of the pantomime season.

The sweet firl strolled along the block. The cheeky dude remarked, Ahem!" Not dreaming of the sudden shock That -tkld reward his stratagem. The maid remarked, with humour grim, "Your ooug-h seems bad to-day, I'm sure. You'd best take this," and handed him A bottle of Woods' Great Pejupermint Onire.

EUMMEB HOTEL, DUKE-STREET, CARDIFF. Firot-clas9 Billiard Table. Annual Professional Tournament, commencing Monday, January 4th, 1809, and Every Evening. Play will commence at 7.30 p.m. Haat3 500 up. Pj-st rri?e value ?12, Second Prize Heats. £ 6, Third Prize vuj?e £3.-G. atthew5. Pro- ,adue prietor. e5929 For Influenza take Woods' Great Pepper- mint Core- Never fails. 1/li. zig. LL6490 "LINSEED OOMPOPITO" with wftna water » 6D exeeUent gargfc for ION throut.

Wrapped in Flames MAN'S SUICIDE BY BURNING An tanuazing story of suicide by burning was toM at a Douglas inquest yesterday. Ha.rry Morgan, aged 28, son of Moses Morgan (an English organ, builder, established for several years in the Isle of Man), had been his father's loading workman in the coin- struofcion of v. £ 1,200 organ just ovened in a Wesleyaii' chapel. Since the completion of the orgatll he had been on the svive." A few days ago, in order to bring him to his senses, this fatne,r sent him a letter ask- ing for the re-payment of C20 remit. This worried, the son, and on Wednesday night He Wept Over It. His wife told him to face it like a man, and he thereupon threatened to do away with himself in a blanket, went next door, UlJ to the ibedroom, kissed her and the child, and repeated that he was going to destroy himself. The wife followed him downstairs, heard him handling the paraffin cam in the back- yard, and then eaw him strike a match and a.pply it to his clothes. He was instantly wrapiped in flajiies. She ram for help. Mearcwhile, the man tore off his clothes, which bror.ght strips of flesh with them. TiK-i he rushed into the house, wrapped himself in a blanket, and went next door, rang his neighbour up, and implored him to come to his aid, as He Was Burning to Death Neighbours followed him back to this house, and found him in awful torment, begging for waiter Taken to the hospital, he lingered till five o'clock on Thursday evening. On a scrap of pa. per he had written: ^"Kate, forgive me.-Yoars in earnest, Harry, your husband." A vesrdiot of "Suicide whilst temporarily insane" was returned, sympathy being expressed with the parents and wife.

Triumphs of Llandovery RE-UNION OF OLD BOYS AT CARDIFF Many good and highly creditable stories can be told of Llandovery School in the past, and they were re-called with m-uch relish at the annual dinner of Old Llan- doverians held at the Royal Hotel. Cardiff, on Friday night, when the Lord Bishop of Llandaff presided over a large number of "old boys." The Bishop proposed "The School and the Past and Present Masters." It was. he said, at Llandovery that they gained their first inspirations and aspirations, and, as an old student, he co-aid not forget the debt he owed to the broad foundatio-n of knowledge laid at Llandovery. He had learnt most of ¡ what he knew of that important modern "1- "I'T'" 1 1 ,1- 'I ,h,1 ¡ AT'- umguage, vy eien, at Lne oiu \.L;L1I- pla-uee.) It had kept itself abreast of scholastic progress, and they must all look back with affection to the old town and its remarkably successful educational institu- tion. Amongst its past wardens still living were the Bishop of St. Asaph, the Bishop of St. David's, and Archdeacon Owen Evans- (loud applause)—and amongst its past masters were learned gentlemen who had made their mark in the world of education. The Warden (the Kev. W. W. Toole- Hughee), in responding, said that eight years had elapsed si-nde he was appointed to his post as director of the destinies of the school. The school now etcod at its record stage, and there were no vacancies for boarders. Not long ago a very eminetnt educationist came to Wales with the ostensible object of encouraging education, and he said in one of his speeches that, after aJl, Llandovery, Brecon, a.nd Cowbridge were only obscure country grammar schools. ("Oh"; cries of "Where is he?" and laughter.) He (the warden) was asked to reply to this, but be did not think it necessary to do so. (Hear, hear.) Since their last meeting, on the results of the Oxford and Cambridge Board examinations, which most of the leading Braglish public took. Llandovery aippeo-red amongst the first eight. (Applause.) They had also during the past year gained three open scholarships and four exhibitions at the universities, and quite lately a boy paesed. into the Higher Civil Service, which was no small feat. But what encouraged him most about the state of Llandovery waos the high average attained by the boys. They had at present at Oxford three old boys who had attained the distinction of being con- sidered good enough, by their college authori- ties, to try for the blue ribbons in classics, history, and mathematics. (Applauee.) The same thing largely applied to their work in the field of sport, for they now had at Oxford amd Cambridge a great many boys who had been tried in all the big trial matches. At Oxford they had been fortunate enough to secure one "blue" this year, and he would be very much surprised if they did not secure a "blue" in Cambridge also before the end of Mr. Pritohard's time. (Applause.) He hoped that soon the school cricket field would be second to none in the whole of Wales. Cricket was a pet hobby of his, and he did all he could to foster it; as to foot- I ball, it could take care of itself in Wale6. (Hear, hear.) A gymnasium was now being built, which would cost about 11,000, and would be worthy of the best traditions of the I school. (Hear, hear.) The Rev. T. Theophilus, vicar of Tredegar, proposed the toast of "The Visitors," to which Dr. Lynn Thomas responded. The Rev. David Davies (Dinas Powis) proposed the health of the chairman, and the Rov. Connop Price (Caerphilly) proposed the health of the secretaries, Dr. W. G. Williams and Mr. C. M. Herbert, of Cardiff. Songs were contributed by the Rev. Coramop Price and Dr. AnuaJ.lt Jones (Aberavon), and a very pleasant evening1 was spent.

Passing Pleasantries. I "Is your parrot intelligent?" "Intelligent! Why, that bird can dD eve,-y. thing but talk." Does your poetry pay?" "Well, it just keeps the woaf from the door." I suppose you read it to him." Tatters (cheerfully): Good-mornin'! Farmer: It wouldn't be good-mornin' ef I offered ye work. Tatters: Naw; de word ud be more like good-day, then. They had been drifting about in the open boat for seven days, and had almost given up hope, when the look-out cried wildly. "A sail, a. sail!" The only woman passenger looked up and asked aoxiously: "Oh, is it a bargain sale- A clever fellow, whose shoes were the worse for wear, fell on a plan to get a pair for nothing. Having arranged with a companion as to the plan, he entered a shoemaker s shop. He laid his hat upon a table n th door, and, having got a pgir that suited him, he gave the sign by stamping h-is foot on the floor, when in ruahed his oompanioll, and, anatoh- inig up his hat, jam off with it The shopkeeper, seeing wiba>t triad happened, ea.id to his customer: a man off w h ich be did, ?,nd with your hat,-after h-im he did, and it is needless to edd the shopk, eeper neVer saw his shoes again. The laan-diord of a hotel met, as he started to go up his own stairs, a man coming down backward with a feather bed on hia shoulders. What have you there?" asked the la-zid, lord. "A bed for you, sir," answered the man. Nonsense—irt is not for moe! I have not ordered any bed." No. 2, Daah-sqnare, sir. "Ah, I thought so! It's next- door." The man turned and bore the bed off before the landlord's eyes, who did not discover his loes until too late.

NEW PANTOMIME SONGS I "Cinderella" continues to attract crowded houses to the New Theatre. New songs and dances are introduced, and lend added charms to a pantomime which for all-round excellence it' would bo difficult, indeed, to surpass. Mr. Hanbury had an enthusiastic reception for his rendering of the new song; Put me on an island with the suffragettes." Mr. Tom Fanoourt was all there" with his humorous song "Salome." Local allu- sions are most refreshing.

DOCTOR'S URGENT CASE I At Jjittled-ean yesterday Alfred Cresswell, surgeon, Cinderford, was summoned by Police-constable Ryland for riding a bicycle without a light, on the 3rd inst. The doctor sa-id he was called to an urgent case at Ruspidge, and ae he could not find his lamp at the moment, he went without it. Fined Is.

"LI:;£ED COMPOUND" with warm water « w Ccmentt lor mending aU things.. tMM Woods' Great Peppermint Cure for Coughs and Colds never fails. 1AJ. 2/9. [L549Q Father, dear Father, come home with me now. A persistent request out of date. He's home ere he's asked, and ready to vow With llOE' SAUCE th his meal he's ne'er late. elSl Printed and publlsned by Tbomaa Jones for the pro. priotora, at 68a, St. llary-etreet, in the City of Car. 4111; by James Norm-, cmu"treet, Swansea-, or R. 0. Williams, GJebeiand-street, Merthyr Tydfil; at the (hep of Mr. Weaiey William*. Bridgend—all la the County of OaD; by Jabez Thoaua, 22, HiCh-attest, Newport; at the (hop of Mj. J. P. Caffmy, Monmouth both In the County 01 Moo. IDOII.th¡ at the shop of Mr. SaTid John. LILDOUY, la the Cwtaty of Carmarthen; and at the offlow ot Mr. T. A. Davies, Tbe BuiwvJt, ttieeoa, la tbe uiuaty of Breetaoek. SATURDAY, JANUARY 16, 1909.

Amatory Letters I LADY COMPLAINS OF ANNOYANCE I WaJter Triots, a. jobbing ta.i.?r, was sum- moned at West London yesterday for I7 lishing a defamatory libel against Zvliss Susan St raker Dentin, daughter of Mr. R. S. Donkiin, J.P., of Wimbledon Common. fr. Bodkin, for the prosecution, stated thai | the defendant was an absolute stranger to Miss Dc,n;ki,n, who for some three or four years past had been the recipient of a nam- ber of amatory letters from him. She was in the habi-t of going- for walks on Wimble-! don Common and in the neighbourhood, and was afraid she might be annoyed by thiló I man while out of doors. On January 4 she received from him a letter consisting of dog-gerol verse, concluding a. follows Have just been t-hi-nking, As Mother Eve tempted Adam, I I might tempt Miss Donlrin. Accompanying the letter was what Dur-I Ported to be a Christmas card, which -bore the representation of an apple and a child, and also some verse. I After the Eummons was served on the de- fendant, he called at the house of the Don- kins and sa.w Mr. Dcmkin, who said: "Are you the raical who has been writing Iotters to my daughter?" and ordered him out of I the house. Miss Donkin ga.re evidence. The Defendant: I don't know the lady. I don t think I have ever seen her before. The letters I wrote were written to another lady I I had known for some years. I did not get I any reply, and I thought they were appre- ciated, and I continued them. They were not meant for Miss Donkin. It is a mistake froiij beginning to end. The lady I know lived near Miss? Don ki n, and I was given the wrong name a.nd address. The magistrate committed the defendant for trial on bail, and advised him to call the lady for whom the letters were intended as a witness at the sessions.

CARDIFF EMPIRE Fred Karno's G. P. O. with Fred Kitchen. pays its first visit next week. All who have seen this last Ka.rno production state t-hat it is funnier than a.ll the others. Fred Kitchen is a native of London. "I come from a very old theatrical stock," said Mr. Kitchen, "my father having been. for 57 years on the stage. He is 78 now, and certainly the oldest clown living. My first appearance? Well, I have no very distinct recollection of that, I was carried on in long clotries when I was only a few weeks old. That was at the Princess Theatre. Porte- I mouth, in a drama called The Dumb Man of Man-chester.' The first part I remember playing was that of a very young boy in a very old drama, 'The Sea of Ice.' I could not "I.. nave oeen more TIkan four years oJd then. I took part in a number of dramas and p".LD tomillie in and around London until I was fourteen. I "as pretty tall, and my experience ha-d given me the appearance of being older than I really was. Consequently, even at this tender age I was quite a man." Bottoming the bill will be a rich pair of Hebrew lmmorists-Howell and Scott to wit. [ This is their first visit to the Principality, as they have only lately come over from America, where they were secured by Mr. j Stoll's American offices. They are sure to make good and afford much entertainment tv Cardiffians.

'Spectators Kept atbayp, I « I THE YACHT CLUB TRAGEDY I Mr. Jenkins Hains, the novelist, was acquitted yesterday at New York, after a trial lasting nearly five weeks, of the, charge of aiding and abetting- his brother, Captain Peter Hains, in the murder of Mr. William EL Annis. The tragedy occurred in August last at the Bay Shiore Yacht Club, Long Island. Captain Harris and his brother were waiting on the quay, when Mr. Annis returned in his yacht. Captain Hains shot and killed Mr. Annis in the presence of the latter's wife, while Mr. Jenkins Hains, it was alleged, kept the spec- tators at bay with a revolver. The captain, who is awaiting trial, declared that Mr. Annas had had guilty relations with his (the captain's) wife. The trial c-f Mr. Jenkins Ilains has taken place at Flushing, Long. Island. The jury retired at four o'clock on Tliurs- day afternoon to consider their verdic-t. j They wrang'led and disputed all night, while the prisoner, maintaining to the last his air of nonchalance, slept peacefully in his prison f cell. Before noon the twelve men, dishevelled and looking exüessinJy irritated, returned to court and asked the judge for definition of the law relating to manslaughter. The defence, hearing this request, abandoned all hope. Surprise was all the greater, therefore, when the jury, at the end of thirty-five hours' consultation, announced their agreement oil a verdict of "Not guilty."

CARDIFF LADY'S FUNERAL I The funeral took place at Penallt Parish Church, Monmouthshire, on Friday of Mrs. Miles, of 17, Wordmvorthiavonue, Cardiff, widow of the late Mr. R. W. Miks, of Fenny Stratford, Bucks., who was one of a prominent family of lay rectors in that neighbourhood. On the previous day a requiem service was held at St. German's, Cardiff, by the Rev. Father Ives, and the funeral service at the deceased lady's former house was conducted by the Itev. F. Summers, vicar of St. John's, Newport, I ;assisted by the Rev. M. Harpur, vioar of Penallt. Some beautiful floral tributes sur- mounted a coffin of polished oak, with ¡ massive brass fittings, the funeral arrange- ments being carried out by Mr. Augustine I Stone, Cardiff.

THE HANDCUFF QUEEN A more than usually attractive programme has been arranged at the Palace, Cardiff, for next week, included in which ia Minerva, the original, woman gaol-breaker and Handcuff Queen, who will introduce her death-defying water escape. That popular little singer of sensible songs, Sable tern; the Waltons, eccentric acrobats; Kinnard, described as a merry magician; LiUie Lora-inc, instrumentalist; Cosgrove and Burns, with their entertainment, "The Singing Academy" Walker and May, coloured singers and dancers; Raymond's clever and interest- ing pictures, and Maurice Hoffman and com- pany in the historical episode, "The Death of Chatterton," make up the remainingitenisI of interest.

————————— ) For Chrvnic Chest Complaints, Woods' Great Pep, t Cure. 1/H. 2/9. LI/^ "LINSEED COMPOUND" (Amssed, Sene?, Squiu, 1 7",?u. &c.) for Coughs. Of Chemists only. eMM  ???? .?B??!?  nies-a nd zee vorld ees mine I /PARK DRIVE # CIGARKriKS Excellently made from pure Virginia of -delightful flavour-a cool and luxuril>us smoke and a miracle of value  1 0 2D  \0 Tobacycooun?tstj 0 FOR Substitutes Coupon in every acket-1 pe 100 given for coulons. Gallaher, Ltd.-The Independent Firm-Belfast & London 1- A 8QUARM ygsf "m- DR5NK < FRO? A '??y Ia SQUARE ?OW BOTTLE. 'R' ?&??????ttSMt? .¡,<. ;{' At. è:' ,i. I :,> > <h\ ^jjg  Ilave YOU Tried I Henry Thomson & Co.'s Old Irish (Green & Red I label) Whisky ? If not, there is a treat in store for you. It is a fine old whisky with a grand mellow flavour, and for punty and excellence cannot be beaten. Next time you are having a drink, ask for a glass of  H. opold <0 "° Old TJaO ,IrishWhis I Manufactured from JCHER'S I a GOLDEN S I cha., RETURNS Golden I SYRETTES Returns MS i ?.i'x:?c[i!reo!Mi:?!/bry n ????? ???'' their g!»:fagctured g»| LONDON. S. E and ?. ?.?, ?.L.? Cool Smoking, facsimile of HalfOunce Packet.

Although hot metal flew in all directions when a huge metal casting exploded yester- day at Messrs. Fowler's foundry, Sheffield, fifteen men who were working close by escaped injury.

That will make aj you eat make you t enjoy your food too- 1 plenty of other sauces 1 but only one H.P. ARE YOU EATING The ALLINSON WHOLEMEAL BREAD VIpE: IMPORTANT STATEMENT. In consequence of eome of my r.umero?e patfente not being aMe to obtain good wholemeal bread, L have g. the Natural Food Company (Limited) to supply the genuine artiole, made expressly to my instructions. Every loaf stamped T. R. ALIdNfiOX, in bold letters. Being unable to advise the brown bread of many bakers, and knowing the importance of proper wholemeal bread for building up a sound mind in a. healthy body, I am determined to see that my patients can obtain it pure—it is a NECESSITY TO ALL WHO WOULD BE WELI-.c-specially those suffering from constipation and its attendant evils To eat ALLXNSON BREAD regularly is the best way to main- tain Health and Strength." (Signed) T R. ALIJNSQN. Ex. L.R.C.P., Ed in. CAUTION.-The name T. R. ALUNSOX is on each loaf, and the paper band round the loaf also bears his autograph and photo- graph. NONE GENUINE WITHOUT. Speoial Baker: S. T. WOODS, 80, Penypeel road. Canton, Cardiff. Send postcard, and oart will call. Sole Proprietors: THE NATURAL FOOD CO. (Ltd.), aos. Cambridge-road. Bethnal Green. N.E. SUNUGHT WISHES ? HEW YEAR ?. A H? t jn r? ? t??s fr ??r) rrmD ? ? <U?th! !tt?  1:'   ? ,?. ? ? ?. ?)? ??kt:?_???..? ..?.L.-J?L—n?L A  t ? ? ? ?*y  'w' T ?  {? )*??t ? ?W?LJ? w w GUARANTEE OF PURITY ON EVERY BAR SUNUGHT SOAP HIE8UM3- TABLETS UULEU MT? ?!!)tjjj)))? We can't Improve the Quality! A Better Soap is beyond the Art of $oapmaking I But we can and have Reduced the Price! Because the Cost of Raw Materials is Lower I »i LEVER BROTHERS LIMITED, PORT SUNLIGHT. i The Name LEVER on Soap is a Guarantee of Purity and Excellence,, { 1 idL

OWNERSHIP DENIED Sidney Hart, farmer, of Westb ur y-on- Severn, wa-s summoned at I^ittledean yester- day, for Permitting the carcase of a. sheep belonging to him, to remain un buried in a fiet.d. Defendant demied it, etating that the oar case did ,not wloaug to him. The Chairman said there was some doubt aoout the case. Defendant had sworn the sheep waa not his, and as there was no erideaice of ownership, the case was dismissed.

For Children's Hacking Cougn at night. Woods' Great Pe-cipermint Cure. 1116. 2/9. "LlSSEKD COMPOUND" tor Cougna and Colds. Of I peorea efficacy. Sid. and Ifli. 9; £ beml«t« only. <6eM