Abergavenny Chronicle

BRAVE BRITISH AIRMEN. I —————— j How the bravery of British airmen has frequently held up the enemy advanco is told by the "London Gazette," which put- lishes the award of bars to M.C.S to the following officers:fi T./2nd Lieutenant (T./Captain) A. K. Cowper, R.A.F.—Bombed foe troops en- trenching, and caused great havoc, and after repeated attacks under heavy fire forced the foe to retire. Captain R. N. Wolton, R.A.F.—Discover- ing Germans massing behind the Front, bombed them reported by wireless to head- quarters, and directed the fire of our bat- teries which caused the foe heavy casualties. Lieutenant IT; Captain ) FitzMorris. H.L.I. and R.A.F.—Drove off a German aerop lane which was attacking our m'll from a height of 500ft. Afterwards he attacked seven enemy scouts and downed one T/Captaiu J. Leacroft, R.A.F.—Led offen- sive patrol which t1 troved seven fee 'planes without lose to itself. W

I NEW CHIEF OF STAFF. Major-General C. F. Romer, Brevet Colonel Roy-al Dublin Fusiliers, has been gazetted Chief of the General Staff. General Romer, the son of a former Jus- tice of Appeal, entered the Army in 1890, and has had a brilliant career. He served in the South African War and was men- tioned in dispatches; he weiit out with the Expeditionary Force in August, 1014; and later was Chief of Staff to the Canadian divisions. He was afterwards Chief cf Staff to General Pulteney's corps, and went through the Sümmc.

I SEAPLANE DOUBLE FATALITY. At a South Coast town en Saturday, ver- dicts of "Death from Misadventure" were returned in th-o cases of Lieutenant John Frederick Raymond Kitchen, aged nineteen, and Second Lieutenant George Cole, aged twenty-six, respectively pilot and observer of a seaplane, who were killed the previous day. The evidence showed that they ex- perienced difficulty with the machine in riing from the wkr owing to a rough sea. It struck a pier, overturned, and fell into Tt'no sea, the deaths of the occupants being duo to drowning.

I NO EVIDENCE OFFERED. No evidence was offered by the prosecution at Winchester Assizes against Sergeant- Major William Keep, A.S.C., who had been committed on the coroner's warrant for the manslaughter of Charles Rieketts, a lad, at IJnwley, by a motor-car. The prisoner, who had been acquitted at the magisterial proceedings, was discharged.

I CHEAPER BUTTER. The retail price of Government butter has been reduced from 23. Gel. to 2s. 4d. per pound. The cheaper butter, however, will net necessarily reach retailers a.t once. Somo days n:ust elapse, during which the retailer will continue to sell off his existing stocks at 2s. 6d. per pound.

I "VICTORY IN A FEW MONTHS." I Mr. G. H. Roberts, Minister of Labour, speaking- at an entertainment to American trooos at the Palace Theatre. London, on Sunday, said he believed that America's aid would determine the issue of the war, and he hoped that within a few months they might meet again to celebrate victory.

Mr. R. B. Walker, secretary of the Agri- cultural Labourer;' Union, has been adopted as Labour candidate for King's Lynn. Sir William Beardmore has conferred with Sir Robert Borden regarding the establish- ment of a shipbuilding varj at Dartmouth, Nova Scotia. The death has taken place, somewhat sud- denly, at Watford, of the Rev. W. Lower Carter, who was widely known in the Con- gregational iainktry. The Sheldrake Military Gazette," founded. at the conclusion cf the Crimean War, has suspended publication for the duration of the war. A verdict of "Wilful murder vaa re- turned by a coroner's jury at Maidenhead against Annie Smith, twenty-four, a laun- dry worker, whose illegitimate child, was found strangled and buried in the back garden of her home. The Council of the Printers' Pmsion Cor- poration state that arrangements have been made to assist in the -maintenance of all necessitous children of printers killed in the war, whether the father was or was not a member of the institution. The board and lodging allowance for land girls in Herts has been raided from 14s. to 6s. per week. Following a raid cn Birmingham billiards saloons seven youths were charged as ab- sentees. When four farmers appealed at Bedford- shire Al-,P,-a! Tr.i).)in: they found their men had joined up voluntarily. Admirals Sir Stanley Colviile and Sir Richard Peirso have been made Grand Cnl- cers of the Legion cf Honour.

Cuttings of Shrubs.—Most shrubs can be propagated at one or another season of the year by cuttings. In a closed propagating frame some will readilv root towards the end of June. These include, forsythia, lilac, staphyles, ceanothus, diervilla, and deutzia. Have ample sand in the soil, one-third, or even half, will not be too much until the shoots have made a few roots. Brompjton Stock.—These old-fashioned stocks are unfortunately not eo much grown as they were a decade ago. The Nice and ten-week strains are more favoured because the plants flower in about half the time from seed. In point of beauty, however, there is no comparison. Stately spikes of the Bromp- ton stock have no rivals. Sow the Med now on a border outside. In cold districts put the plants up in autumn, and give them the shelter of a cold frame in winter. Early Flowering (Thrysanthemums.—These plants will now have taken good hold of the soil and be making rapid growth. Four or i five shoots having issued, the result of a na tural break or "stopping," and attained a length of 6in., a further "stopping" may be practised, so as to obtain a bushy plant and greater floriferousness. The staking of the plants is often deferred till they have made considerable headway, with the result that they are spoilt through toppling over, or damaged by wind er rain. Frequent waterings during dry weather and syringe- ir.g the foliage are other items too often neglected; yet they are essential to success. » Double Gypsophila.—Few grow the single when once they have seen the double- flowered sort. Seeds sown now in a frame cr on a border outside provide the easiest method of increase. From 75 to 80 per cent, of the plants produce double flowers from seeds. Division of the clumps, cuttings, and root-grafting are practised, but seeds offer the simplest method of propagation. » Fig Trees.—These grow and fruit in warm districts if they rcceive attention. Do not allow the growths to become crowded at this time of year. Thin out and step the young shoots as they are produced. Each choot does not need to be stopped in the same way as is done with trees growing in- doors. Give manure when a number of fruits are swelling. » Tho Parsley-leaved Blackberry. — For general use in this country there is no blackberry so useful for the garden as the pa re,ley-lea ved one (Rubus laciniatus), excfcpt perhaps a good variety of the common sort. It has ornamental, cleeply-cut foliage, and bears an abundance of good fruit suitable for preserving purposes. It ripens much better in cold districts than most of the American blackWrrics, such as Wilson Junior, Law- son's, Kittatiuny, and so forth. It presents- no difficulty in culture and is a success in many gardens were the others named* are often a failure. Caro of Grafted Fruit Trees.-Towards tho end of June one may expect grafted shoots which have "taken" properly to h::ve made a few inches of growth. The clay will now need removing, having become haid. With a block of wood in one hand and a mallet in the other, as depicted in the diagram, a few taps will cause the clay to break away quite easily. Remove the tie. below. and retie just for safety. To guard against breakage at the union, a stake placed in the ground and the scion fastened thereto is to be recommended. For gome considerable time there is little power of resistance at the point of grafting, 'hence every care is necesary to guard against acci- dents. The Week's Work.—Careful staking of tlie border carnations will save much diaappoint- i-mént. The weight of the flowers is sufficient to bend the growths. Heavy lams and strong winds cause much damage IT less ade- quate stakes and ties are provided. In the to'vn and suburban garden foxglove is, an indispensable plant. It grows and Sowers freely in moist, shady positions and poor soil, where few plants thrive. Sow outside now where the plants are to flower or in a reserve bed. The sorts with spotted flowers are particularly pleasing. Nearly all fruit trees will derive benefit from copies water- ings in hot, dry weather. Give liquid manure once a fortnight to trees carrying heavy crops. If possible, mulch young trees to assist in keeping moisture in the ground. When the fruit crops are gathered the trces in pots may be placed outside. Plunge the pots to their rims in the open, or in beds of ashes. Keep the foliage clean by regular syringeing, and make sure that the roots have a proper supply of water at all times. Such well-known early varieties of potatoes as Express, Victor, Ninetyfold, Harbinger, or Early Favourite should now give profit- able crops, but only dig up as required. If really good examples of salsify are expected, allow each plant from 9in. to 12iu. t f sj ace, and whenever the soil approaches dryness, use the hoe freely in order that the surface may be porous and allow the free entry of sun and air. Early Celery.—Keep a sharp look out for green-fly. This often get-, into the heart of the young plants, and, if not disturbed, multiplies at such a rate that the whole plant is quickly covered, seriously check- ing growth, and one of the most fruitful causes of bolting or running to seed. C. » to sec d Tomatoe9 in Frames.—Providing a start is made with good plants, heavy crops may be taken from tomatoes growing in ordinary garden frames. Four plants will be ample for a frame 4ft. wide; plant at the bottom and train to the top of the frame, keeping the growth well clear of glass. Late Beetroot.—Thin out the late-sown rows of these, allowing each plant about 8in. Where the soil is very light a thorough watering after thinning is recommended. There is still time to make further sowings of globe beet, but, excepting where the soil is naturally rich, large bulbs need not ba expected.

NO HOME RULE BILL. I IRISH CONSCRIPTION ALSO TO BE DROPPED. Replying in the House of Lords to criti- jisms of the Government's Irish policy. Lord Duraon said that after the decisions to apply ^inscription to Ireland and to introduce Home Rule two great events happened. One was the discovery of the conspiracy of Sinn Fein leaders with the enemy, and that the plot was to mature at the very moment the Germans made their attempt; to annihi- late our Armies in France. That discovery made it impossible for the Government to pursue their Home Rule policy for the time being. Moreover, the favourable attitude existing at the time of the Convention had vanished. Ulster was hardening against Home Rule. and public opinion here and in the Dominions was changing. In these cir- cumstances it would have been folly, not statesmanship, to proceed with the prepara- tion of a Bill which there was not the ghost of a chance of anyone accepting. Without Home Rule they could not expect to secure conscription except at a wholly dis- proportionate cost. The second great event which changed the situation was that the Roman Catholic clergy advised their flocks, under penalty of eternal damnation, to re- sist conscription to the utmost. In these circumstances it was necessary for the Government, he would not say to abandon their policy, but to recognise the facts and to adjust their policy accordingly.

ENTERTAINING EPITAPHS. I There is a stone in Leamington Cemetery dedicated to the memory of one J. T. Bur- gess, who edited the Leamington fpa Courier." His career and end are ade- quately summed up in one word—"Resti.ng." A departed auctioneer who lived in the city of Worcester had inscribed on his memorial stone as an epitaph, "Gone." Brief, eco- nomical, and retrospective. In a Sussex graveyard may be seen a stone on which arc chiselled, after the name and date of death of the deceased, just two expressive words—"He was." But two of the stran- gest as well as the briefest epithets are to be found on stones in Cane Hill Cemetery, Belfast. On one of them, erected to the memory of a lazy fellow by one who evi- dently knew him well, are the words, "Asleep (as usual)." On the other, "Left Till Called For." A certain photographer has this inscribed over his grave, "Here I Lie, Taken from Life."

QUEER SUPERSTITIONS. I At Monte Carlo, the moment news gets out that a ruined gambler has committed suicide, there is a rush to the tables. The popular superstition is that at such a time the plunger is sure to win. Another card superstition is that if one player borrows money from another, he also borrows that player's luck. Salt was a very scarce and costly commodity up to a century or so ago. It was tremendously taxed. Hence the superstition that spilling salt will cause a quarrel. The case is the same 203 regards the ill-luck of breaking a looking-glass.

DIFFICULT FEATS. I One of the most difficult walking feats on record was accomplished in v. well-known pedestrian named Lloyd under- took for a bet to walk thirty miles back- wards in nino hours. This he succeeded in doing, with fourteen minutes to spare, on tho road between Haghot and Portsmouth. A still more eccentric wager was made by Horace Walpole's brother, Lord Orford, who backed a flock of geese to race an equal number of turkeys from Norwich to London. He won the bet, for the geese kept to the road all the time. The turkeys, when dark- ness came on, fiew to roost iu the trees, from which their drivers d-ai- l a hard task to dis- lodge them. The turkeys were two days behind the goose. An extraordinary walk- ing match was arranged in 1S07 by Captain Bennett, who undertook to trundle a hoop from Whitechapol Church to Onpr, in Essex, a distance of twenty-two miles, in three hours and a half. The stakes were 100 guineas, and Bennett won with nearly an hour to spare. Two years later a Cam- bridge man bet a considerable sum that ho would walk on stilts twelve miles in four and a half hours, no stoppage to be allowed ivnd his feet not to touch the ground at any time. He did his journey in three hours fifty-five minutes.

THE RATTLESNAKE'S RATTLE. I The rattle from the rattlesnake is do. veloped from the single conical scalo or epi- dermal spine, which in most snakes forma the internal tegument of the tail. The bone on which the root of the rattle rests consists of the last caudal vei-tebra and is covered with a skin which is the beginning of tho rattle in young rattlesnakes.

VERY OLD BRICKS. I Well-made brick3 are the most durable of building materials. In the British Museum are bricks taken from the ruins of Nineveh and Babylon which show no signjt of decay or disintegration, although they were neither burned nor baked, but simply left to dry in the sun.

COUPONLESS SAUSAGES. I The Ministry of Food announces that on and after June 24 cooked beef sausages may be sold, without the detachment of meat coupons, by registered meat retailers as well as caterers.

The last tramp found the pantry supplies exhausted, but the mistress made it a rule never to turn any away empty-handed. "Here's a penny for you, my man," she said to the frayed and ragged-looking indi. vidual who stood under the porch with ex- tended hand. "I'm not giving it to you for charity's sake, but merely because it pleases me." "Thankoo; but couldn't you make it a bob, and enjoy yourself thoroughly, mum?" A purchaser of a. riverside property asked the estate agent if the river didn't some- times overflow its banks. "Well," replied he, "it isn't one of those sickly streams that are always confined to their bids." "What is a sense of humour?" "A sense of humour," replied Mr. Growcher, "is what makes you laugh at something that happens to somebody else which would make yon mad if it happened to you." The Tich bachelor &ighed and looked at the beautiful girl fixedly. Then he spoke: "Things are at sixes and sevens with me. I feel the great need oi a woman in my home—one who "ould straighten out my tangled affairs a-- 1 make life worth living again. Her glai spoke an interest which approximated f etati(- -I. "Yes?" she queried softly. "-o you know of any good, able-bodied womaji I could get to clean the house V

CLUB WINDOW. I 0- The Marquis of Downshire tells nt I amusing story of how one day a friend od his, a young artillery officer, saw about fifty Germans coming towards him, apparentlj quite alone. This surprised hitn. But a sccond later he saw. that they were prisoners being "taken in" by a single small Scott soldier in kilts. "What will you give m« cne of those for?" called the officer to Jock "Oh," shouted he, "ye can have the lot fox a drink." Mr. Pringle, M.P., tells a good gtory of a certain member for a northern constituency about whom spread a rumour that he took too many doses of alcohol. The member at once went north to deny the rumour, and ex- pectd rather a. br.d time, but he was met at the railway station by a brass band and a cheering crowd. Now, about this rumour began the aggrieved member. "Not a -%v,c-rd!" whispered the chairman. "It's made you the most popular man in the place!" Lord Rhondda, in his schooldays, one day happened on the bully of the school behaving in a nastily truculent way to another boy— a very much smaller one. Young Thomas told the bully to desist, but was ignored. Then he took the task of defending the youngtiter upon himself, and hit out at the bully. There was a fierce fight, but Thomas was so determined and so strong in his zeal that he won. Sir Edward Clarke, K.C., tells an amusing story concerning Mr. Justice Lawrence. The teamed judge, who was noted for his polite- I IK-SB, was, it appears, passing sentence on a man, and in the course of his preliminary remarks he referred to him as a "pr&fes- sional burglar." The prisoner raised loud protests from the dock. "Here," he ex- claimed, "I dunno wot you mean by calling me a professional burglar. I've only done it once before, and I've been nabbed both times." Mr. Lawrence beamed upon him. "Oh, I did not mean to say," he remarked in his most suave manner, "that you had been very successful in your profession." I Brigadier-General S.ndeman-Carey, who is popularly known aa the "man who closed the gap," comes of a clerical fa,-Aily. His father was a clergynrtan, and Canon Tupper-Carey, the popular Vicar of Huddersfield, formerly of York, and previously of Lowestoft, is the General's brother. f' Sandeman-Carey" is an officer whose courage and personal mag- netism inspire men to "stick it" when they arc in a tight corner. » One of Lord Lansdowne's pet aversions is advertisement. This prejudice lends colour to an occasion when his attention was drawn to tho advertisement of a certain hotel. The proprietor, in order to attract his guests, an- nounced that all who stayed at his hotel were entitled to fino fishing in adjacent waters. Lord Lnnsdowne was inteiestcd in this announcement, for the waters happened to be on his private property, and tho fish which the hotel guests were invited to catch belonged to him After Mr. Andrew Carnegie had amassed his huge fortune a gentleman called on him to ask him to advance a sum of many thou- sands of pounds for a certain work. lie had heard of tho great ironmaster's generosity, and felt sure of success. Mr. Carnegie was on his knees looking on the floor for some- thing he had lost. "All right," he said, without getting lip, "go on with the work, you shall have the money." Just then in came auother man to report a fire which liad burnt down one of the buildings on the estate. "We must have the piace rebuilt," said the millionaire, as he still searched the floor and did not trouble to raise his head. "What are you looking for?" the first man asked. "Oil," said Mr. Carnegie, "I've dropped sixpence on this carpet, and the man that would wilfully throw away six- pence because he won't take L"L.IC troiible to look for it is not to be forgiven." At a dinner, Mr. H. J. Creedy, C.B., the private secretary to the Minister for War, told the following anecdote. "A business man," he related, "bought a number of those Do-it-now signs, and hung them around his office with the hope of smarten- ing up his staff. He succeeded. Within a week the cashier had absconded with a thou- sand pounds, the manager had eloped with the typist, and three clerks had demanded increased salaries." Mr. W. B. Berry, the well-known actor, is fond of telling an amusing story of a well- known comic man who returned from the Front in a depressed state of mind. "What's the ma tied" asked Berry. "Fed up with the ..rar?" "It's not that," replied the man gloomily. "The fact is I've found out that I'm only a tenth-rate humorist after all. There's not a man in my company who doesn't beat my tip-top wheezes twenty times a day!" • • » An amusing story is told in connection with the early days of Sir J. B. Robinson, the South African millionaire. He was cross- ing the Vaal River in 1869, looking for dia- monda. He asked the natives if they had seen any "pretty stones," and at last he found a man who had a diamond. It was a small stone, and the prospector offered him X10 for it, but he refused to part with it. He increased his offer to £12, but still the man refused. Robinson had not expected to be rebuffed in this fashion. "What will you take for it?" he asked, prepared to pay almost any price demanded. "Twenty goats," was the firm reply; "nothing less." "I sent off to the nearest farm," says Sir J. B. Robinson, in telling the story, "and bought twenty goats for £ 7 10s., and so got possession of my first diamond." It has not been his last, by any means. There is nothing more disturbing at the theatre than the late-comer; neither the audience nor the actors exonerate him. George Graves ,tho comedian, once "got one in" for some self-satisfied people who stalked in and noisily made their way to the first row of the stalls whilst he was singing a song. He stopped, regarding the late-comers with annoyance. Then, turning to the house, ho announced, in stentorian tones, "The Tooting express has just arrived!" 0 0 0 Amongst tho many good legal stories credited to Mr. J. B. Balfour Browne is the following: It appears that at the conclusion of the assizes at a nothern town, the legal luminaries indulged in a cricket match. A certain well-known judge presently occupied the wicket, and so persistently did ho dis- play the stonewalling tactics that his oppo- nents despaired of getting him out. After a futile appeal of- Ifleg before," the judge said to the umpire, "I wonder if I am to be ftn- Erisoned here until the next assizes." He had hardly spoken when an extra fa-st one re- moved the cross-pieces. "No, my lord," replied the umpire, with a sly grin, "you are bailed out. < w I Mr. Malcolm Ross, the famous Anzao war correspondent, tells the following good story. One evening a party of New Zealanders in the fighting zone spotted an animal. It had evidently loet itself, and it made an excel- lent mark for the rifle. But a subaltern told the men to desist until a proper identifica- tion had been secured. "If it's a bullock," he said, "we'll shoot him for beef, but if it's a cow we'll make her prisoner."

FUN AND FANCY. I — <— t Simmons: "Do you know his wife?" Kim. f mons: "Only through eoixic cigars she gave him." | Aunt Ma.ry: "My child, do not desire to- grow up. Your babyhood is your happiest time." Little Cissie: "That's what people eay when they have forgotten all about it." Casey: "There's trouble over at Clancy's." Costigan: Phwat is ut?" Casey: "A family foight." Costigan: "Shure, thot's. not uirouble; thot's enjyment." Dentist: "Excuse me a moment. Patient. "Where are you going?" Dentist: "Before beginning work oil you I must have my drill." Patient. Great Scot, man? Can't you pull a tooth without a rehear- &-i-I P Mistress: "I wouldn't hold the baby bo near the tiger's cage, Jane." Jane: "There's no risk. The tiger is a man-eater,' and th' child is a gir-rul." Mrs. Soames: "I've found out where my husband spends his evenings." Mrs. Mop- "At ]  omL- oins: "Where? Mrs. Sonirics: "At home. You see, I had to stay in myself last night." Fond Lover: "If I were rich, darling,, would you love me m-cre than you do?" She: "Well, I might not love you any more,, but I would look forward to our vcddin; day with a great deal more impatience- than I do at present." When my wife and I were married we- used to call each other 'Birdie. "Do- .you still do it?" No. I call her a parrot and a magpie, and she usually refers to me aa a jay." "Did you go and tell your papa. that Mrs. Fizzleglass is here?" said the little tot's mother. "Yes, mamma." "What did he say?" "I can't tell." "Why not?" "'Cos 'taint polite to whisper in coi-ripa!iy Lady: "What makes the fashion publica-- tions so costly?" Dealer: "The plates, madam—the pictures, you know." Lie, y I "But anyone can draw hats and dresses." I Dealer: "Ah, yes; only it takes a great. artist to draw faces that will look well with them Her head had dropped upon his shoulder.. "If only," he whispered, "thy cheek could remain there for ever!" Little thought he what was to be. Littlo thought he until he got 'back to camp and tried to move her check' from his tunic with :1mmonia. check from his tunic with ammonia. "Oh, Willie, Willie!" exclaimed his-- mother, shocked and grieved. "How often have I told you not to play with that naughty Johnson boy?" "Mamma," said William, who appeared in a regrettable- state of disorder, and with a. brub^ed face,, in utter disgust, "do I look as if I had been playing with anyboJy P" Mrs. Rankin: "When it comes to rt- | sourc-cfulness you can't beat Mrs. Amley." Mrs. Phyls: What do you Mrs. Rankin: "When she wants to ccrii b her floor she fastens a couple of brushes on the feet of her little boy, Willie, and let him pre- tend he is roller-skating in the soapsuds." The sergeant was taking a class in mus- ketry, slid after explaining as to cleaning; and handling the rifle, he began to ask (questions. "New, then, Private Murplhy,. can you tell me wbv we always take a tux- o'clock aim?" Paddy hesitated for a mo- ment, then said, Well, sargitit, because ife is pretty dark at seven "Bessie," said the- young man pleadingly, "this is the fifth time I have called at your home since I saw you last. Is there any way by which I can always be ur{: of find- ing you in, or, at least, cf always knowing- where you are when I call for you?" "You. might ring me up, you know," responded the pretty telephone girl, looking dreamily at her shapely fingers. First Student: "Here's a nice letter for a- fellow to receive! The scoundrel who wroto: it calls me a blithering idiot." Second ,1 Student: "What's his name?" First Stu-- dent: "That's just what I'd like to find out; but there's no signature." Second Student: "Don't you recognise the writing?" It must Le somebody who knows you." Frod: "Suppose a pretty girl were to" grant you the privilege of kissing her either on the right cheek or the left, which would you choo.se?" Jack: "Neither; I'd muke a.- choice between tho two." Mrs. Howard: "The walls of your house,, are very thin, aren't they? Mrs. Coward: "Oh, very! We could actually hear our- neighbours having celery for dinner yester- day!" Bessie: "Oh, Mabel! I am in an awful- dilemma. I've quarrelled with Henry, and he wants me to send his ring back." Mabe-1: "That's too bad!" Bessie: "But" that isn't the point. I've forgotten which; ia his ring." Ser" geant (to Private) "Don't forget- ,vc'r-a fightin' a hartful and hingenious foe. So be hartful, too; and if you run short of' ammunition, don't on no account let the- enemy see it, but keep on fir in A mud-bedraggled Tommy was plodding- wearily towards the base, when a subaltern, Flopped him. "Do you know that your re- giment is in the front line now? Why aren't you there he asked. "Well, sir, tho Tommy explained. "We were just going- over the top when the officer shouted, 'Strike for home and glory, lads!' All the others struck for glory. But I struck for home!" Bridget was a new maid in an artist'a family. One afternoon her mistress was giving her instructions as to the dinner. "Now, Bridget, don't forget the potatoes," said she. "No, ma'am," replied Bridget. "And will you have 'em in their jackets or in the nood?" Dilapidated Dodgework: "Pardon me, sir, but have you seen a policeman round here?" Polite Pedestrian: "No. I'm sorry. Dilapidated Dodgework: "Thank you. Now will you kindly hand over your watch and purse?" Farmer: "I have bought a barometer,. Hannah, to tell when it is going to rain, ye know." His Wife: "To tell when it's eoing" to rain! Why, I never heard o' such ex- travagance. What do you suppose the Lord has given ye the rheumatiz for?" Mrs. Money-Made, who employs a mother's help, inquired of the errand boy, "Who was it who took the bread from the baker yes- terday?" Boy: "The young lady." Jdrs. Money-Made: "Tho young lady! Who is that?" Boy: "Why, the young lady here. Mrs. Money-Made "If you call my help the young lady, what would you call me?" Boys "The old woman, mum."

I A C-3,000 RCPE OF PEARLS. At Marlborough-street Police-court on Saturday George Francis Levee. twenty-two, air mechanic. was sentenced to three months' imprisonment for attempting to obtain by false pretences from William Car- rington Smith, 130, Regent-street, London, W., a rope of pearls worth £ 3.000. He wrote to the firm, signing himself G. Fran- cis Levee, Grenadier Guards, and asking that several rows of pearls should be sent to him on approval. Asked for references, prisoner mentioned Prince Arthur of Con- naught, and stated that he had just bought an estate in Devonshire. Inquiries were made, and he was arrested. Levee pleaded guilty, and asked that the case might be summarily disposed of.

I GENERAL SEELY. Brigadier-General the Right Hon. J. E. B. Seely, C.B., D.S.O., M.P., a former War Secretary, has been appointed a member of the Council of the Ministry of Munitions. He will represent on the Council the "Warfare" group of departments, which includes tho engines, trench warfare, and munitions in- ventions departments. General S-Vely has been in command of a I cavalry brigade in France.

———'——— i I,GOOD-BYE, MOTHER." "Good-bye, mother, and all the family. God bleæ you all. Remember me to all my friends." This note was found on Private Terence Goodier, whose body w?a dMc-overed in a pit at Knowsley Park, Lord Derby's Lancashire seat. At the inquest it was stated that Goodier suffered from fever and trench feet, and a verdict of "Suicide whilst of unsound mind" was returned.